Attack First, Ask Questions Later
by ajhoran
Summary: This is a slow burn romance between Gibbs and my OC. There is an age difference and it's rated m for a reason. Natalie Kane meets her family, someone who works for NCIS, and gets adopted by the gang but her attraction for Gibbs and his for her comes into play.
1. chapter 1

Attack First, Ask Questions Later

Chapter 1

Natalie Kane was the most nervous she had ever been in her whole life. Last week someone had tracked her down and told her that she had family she was unaware of. Apparently her mother was the illegitimate daughter of someone who was looking for them. He was some big shot in D.C. Natalie just moved to D.C. to start her doctorate degree at Georgetown when some private investigator knocked on her apartment door. It was her second day in the city. The guy was good. He gave her a dossier and said that if she wished to contact her maternal grandfather he would be grateful for the call and then left.

She hadn't even fully unpacked, not that she had much. Her mom passed just this past spring in a car accident. They lived in a small town in northern Pennsylvania until she was accepted to Columbia in NYC. Her mom moved with her to New York as Natalie was only 14 when she was accepted for her undergraduate degree. Natalie graduated 3 years later with a double degree in Biology and Psychology. She proceeded to get her masters in both over the next 3 years before applying for her doctorates. She applied to Columbia, Harvard, Princeton and Georgetown. Accepted to all four schools she made the difficult decision to move from New York to Washington. It wasn't that difficult, it meant she got away from him. And the place she lost her mother.

At 20 years of age, looking towards her 21 first birthday, Natalie sat on a small sofa in her tiny living room staring at the yellow-orange folder handed to her by the most plain man she had ever seen. In fact, she couldn't recall much about him. "I guess that's what makes him so good at his job" she muttered. Taking a deep breath Natalie reminisced on the day her life changed forever last year.

Natalie closed the door to their apartment at 8pm. She had spent the last 4 hours at the lab doing research for her thesis on The Root Causes of Transgenderism and was looking forward to her home cooked meal and a long weekend with her mom. Instead she found her mom tied to a chair and her personal nightmare holding a knife.

"Glad to see you finally made it my love," he stated walking towards her. "Your mom and I can't seem to agree on the status of our relationship. She seems to think we have broken up and I keep telling her that we are going to be together forever, I had to restrain her. We are going for a ride Natty." She was frozen. Her mom was bloody and bruised with a few slashes here and there. Hyperventilating Nat looked to the door, "I wouldn't if I were you," he said menacingly, "I'll slit her throat, and she's the only family you have left."

Natalie's birth father, George Kane, died in a farming accident when she was just 2. Mallory Kane was the only family she had left. Mallory was disowned when she got pregnant at 16, her hypocrite of a grandmother kicked her out. Granny Mae was a mistress to some married guy when she was in college and Natalie thought that was rather hypocritical. There was no lost love for Granny Mae. Mallory was Natalie's whole world. She couldn't loose her.

They left in his car. Natalie was tied up in the front seat and her mom was laying down in the back seat. "I don't understand why you would do this, I said I didn't want to go out with you." He was near tears. They had been friends since she was 16 and they met in a criminal psychology class. He was always so nice to her. Most people resented her for being so smart. She just felt like an outsider. At graduation they shared a drunken kiss and Natalie said she never wanted that to happen again. Since then he had been distant but friendly. This was completely unexpected and for the life of her Natalie couldn't seem to recall anything in any of her psychology classes that would help her defuse the situation. 2 days ago, when they were in the library marking essays for classes they were teacher's assistants for, he asked her out to dinner this weekend to commemorate their upcoming graduation. A date, he clarified. Natalie wasn't interested. He was upset and left and she hadn't seen him on campus since then.

As they were driving on the Brooklyn bridge he kept getting more and more upset that and saying she would understand, soon enough she would understand. Natalie yelled because they were dangerously close to hitting another vehicle. He swerved to miss it. At the high speeds and angle they hit the side of the bridge the car flipped over the side and plummeted into the cold water below. Natalie was knocked unconscious and was pulled from the car by a off duty police officer. Her mother was trapped in the backseat and drowned. There was no sign of her kidnapper. Police found a collage dedicated to her in his apartment and dozens of journals documenting his declining mental condition. She was informed recently a body washed up on shore and the identification was tentatively his. Natalie was no longer in love with New York. Everywhere she looked she saw him or her mom. So she accepted her position at Georgetown (they offered her a full doctoral scholarship as long as she taught two classes a semester until she was complete) and moved.

Natalie rented a small mini-apartment in Washington near the university. It was an old converted mall. All the units were under 400 sq. feet. Her living room was also her dining area with a small corner sofa and convertible coffee table/dining table. On the opposite wall was a mounted flat screen tv with numerous book shelves filled with books and dvds. Next was her tiny kitchen with mini fridge/freezer combo, 3 cupboards above a sink with two lower cabinets, one contained her cleaning supplies, the other was dry goods. She also had a mini stove and coffeemaker on her counter. She put in the smallest microwave stand known to man that fit along the wall before her bedroom and had her microwave there with two pots and two frying pans in the cupboard below it. Her bedroom could be accessed with a pocket door. Her bed took up the majority of the floor. It was just a mattress on the floor with curtains and lights hanging around it. It was covered in a variety of pillows. Her mom was a bit of a hippy and they style seemed to rub off on Natalie. Her walls had a few shelves with the only mementos she had kept from New York. Including the only picture she had of the only guy she ever loved, Brian. He was with her during their undergrads. He went on to medical school. He was the only person to understand what it was like to be a child genius, he started his undergrad at 16. He was her first and she always had fond memories of him. She wished him the best. They kept in touch through e-mails and the occasional phone call. The picture of them in central park was next to various photos of her with her mom and their cat when she was growing up. Opposite the doorway and next to the entrance to her bathroom was a wardrobe that kept some of Natalie's clothes and all 5 pairs of shoes. It wasn't much. There was a small dresser beside that beneath the only window that kept the basics of her clothing, socks, underwear, bras, shorts, tank tops, t-shirts and pj's. Her bathroom was small. You could barely turn around in it. It had the basics, toilet, sink with small vanity and her stand up room only shower. Natalie figured she'd be spending the majority of her time on campus and didn't need much room. The mostly furnished apartment worked perfectly for her.

The building itself was very old and was one of the first shopping malls built. It was open to the public during the day and was security guarded at night. You needed key card and code access to enter the building after hours. The main floor was designated for businesses. There was a café that was open from 7am until 10pm. It also had a small convenience store attached to the café. Two lawyers offices were across the hall. A gym was at the back of the building and took up about half the downstairs floor space on one side. The other side was a daycare. There was a tailors, pet grooming salon, massage therapist office, embroidery store and a private investigator. Apparently the very private investigator that visited her just now. The top 2 floors were apartment units. They ranged from 200 sq. feet to the two 800 sq. foot 2 bedroom units. There was a few empty apartments at the moment but the manager told her they didn't stay empty for long. They usually rented as short term leases for those in DC for short times but their long term tenants were mostly professionals like herself. There were two doctors, five or 6 people who commuted and only stayed during the week, and a bunch that either worked on capital hill. There were two families, one was a single mom in medical school living in one of the smaller units and one living in one of the 2 bedroom units. Young family with just a baby. The other 2 bedroom unit was taken up by the manager.

It was getting late, nearing 9pm and Natalie could hear the shops closing up and the guards locking the doors downstairs. Any business that stayed open afterhours usually did so for those living there. The only exception was the gym which stayed open 24hrs. It had a separate entrance on the street so their members could come and go as they pleased and their locked inner door could only be accessed by employees and building tenant key cards. Natalie's trainer usually met her 4 times a week at 9:30 at night. Natalie liked the trainer. He owned and operated his gym and held private classes if need be. Natalie had been starting Krav Maga in NYC before she left and loved that her trainer taught it. He was actually former Israeli Mossad. He came in especially for Natalie after she told him what happened to her. She wanted to feel safe again and didn't want to freeze. Tomorrow would be their first session.

Natalie went to her kitchen and started her kettle, she needed tea if she was going to get through the file sitting on her coffee table. She kept staring at the two business cards attached to it. One was said Ronald Glover, Private Investigator and in small print beneath that retired DC metro detective. The other was clearly for her grandfather, Tom Morrow, Director of NCIS and in small print said Naval Criminal Investigative Service.


	2. chapter 2

So I happened to have two chapters done up soI figured I'd get this one published as well. It could be a bit before I get another one posted.

Obviously I do not own anything with NCIS and I'm just playing with the characters in my own little world. I make no money from this but I do own my own original characters.

Reviews are always welcome and I'm flattered to have interest in my story.

Now onto the story, enjoy.

Chapter 2

Natalie sat sipping her chamomile tea and opened the file. The first page was her mother's birth certificate. Parents listed as mother: Mae Whitefield and father: Thomas Morrow. Her mother's full name was Mallory Elizabeth Morrow. There were legal files with Morrow paying Granny Mae a sum of money to care for her mother but then her grandmother moved away and cut off ties from Morrow. There were bank statements showing the returned checks for years. Her mother's marriage to her father was also in the file and her own birth certificate. Natalie Maureen Kane. After that was a letter from her grandfather, hand written.

Miss Kane,

I have asked Mr. Glover to search for your mother. I have been searching for Mallory for over a decade with no luck myself when I hired Ron. Ron and I went to high school together back in the day. He's informed me he has found you and rather than disturb your life too much I thought a letter may be welcome. I would like to start by giving you my condolences on your mother's passing. I'm sorry that I never got to be a part of her life like Mae and I had agreed upon. My marriage had hit a rocky point when I met Mae and started an affair. I deeply regret the pain I caused both her and my wife. Mallory was not something I was prepared to deal with when I had two boys at home. However I fell in love with my daughter the first and only time I held her. My life became complicated after your grandmother disappeared and I was not able to locate her or my only daughter.

10 years ago I was the deputy director of NCIS and thought that perhaps with my newly appointed position I could start looking for my long lost daughter in hopes of catching up. 6 months ago I hired Ron to look for her. He's given me a background on yourself and your mom but I would very much like to meet you. My wife has passed and I've already lost one son in the air force while my only remaining child is in the navy. Scott is married but he and his wife did not have children. You would be my only grandchild, if you accept me.

Natalie, I cannot begin to understand all you have been through and will understand if this is not something you wish. If that is so I will accept it. But know that I would very much like to meet with you, get to know you and you are very welcome in my family. While my wife Janet knew about your mother she never knew about you, nor have my sons Scott and Thomas Jr. You and your mother were kept secret and you can remain a secret if you wish. I understand you are starting Georgetown in the fall to complete your doctorate in Psychology. To have two masters and soon to be a doctorate under your belt at your age is truly remarkable and I want you to know how proud of you I am.

If you would like to talk, I can be made available at your convenience. Anything short of a national emergency can wait. You have my card and I've written my home and cell numbers for you. You can also reach me at NCIS in writing if you prefer. Or e-mail since the younger generation leans towards that. I do look forward to hearing from you but if not, I understand, it's a lot to accept into your life.

With warm regards,

Tom Morrow

Natalie read and re-read the letter in her grandfathers handwriting. It was clear he wanted the personal touch as opposed to a printed letter. He had nice handwriting if a little sloppy, probably from years of writing things out before computers. There was a smudge near the bottom, probably a tear she thought. It brought tears to her own eyes thinking of the hell her whole family had been through. How each member was torn away from each other. Natalie wanted to meet her grandfather. She just didn't know how. How does she contact him? A letter? Just call him out of the blue? Then what? It was almost 11 pm when Natalie made her decision.

 _Tom Morrow POV_

As director of NCIS Tom was often at work late. Since the death of his wife Janet, from breast cancer, he didn't like going home as much. That was unless Scott was home on leave. It was a Friday night and he was going over some of the latest reports when his assistant popped her head in. "Director?" she asked.

"Cynthia I thought I told you to go home over an hour ago, its late and there's no need for you to stay" he told her looking up in surprise.

"I know sir and I was just finalizing your itinerary for next weeks defense conference but I got a call for you, I know its late and she clearly didn't think anyone would still be here…" Cynthia trailed off watching his face. "I have her on line 1, she didn't state what she wanted, but I thought it could be important if she's calling this late."

Tom nodded his head and picked up the receiver on his phone, "Thank-you Cynthia, now please go home," he ordered her gently. "Director Morrow" he stated confidently though the phone.

"Oh, um," said a sweet voice on the other end. "I'm… well. My name is Natalie Kane" and with those words Tom's heart stopped. He gave the letter to Ron earlier this week and never expected to hear from her this soon, if at all.

Clearing his throat he thought of how to respond, "Miss Kane-"

"Natalie please, or Nat" she interrupted.

"Natalie then. I am very pleased you called. I wasn't sure…" he trailed off.

She chuckled, "Neither was I to be honest."

"Are you here is DC, my understanding was you hadn't moved from New York quite yet," he asked. He heard her ascent through the phone and continued, "I'll be honest I'm not sure where to go from here and I desperately don't want to pressure you."

She chuckled again and Tom smiled at the sound. "I'm not sure either sir, but I would like to maybe sit down sometime." Tom felt himself relax. She wanted to get to know him. He was glad. He always wanted grandchildren and his eldest son was close once before his death. Scott and his wife had no interest in children. He had three fine grand-dogs. Two beautiful German Shepherds and one funny little daschund.

"I'm free whenever you would like my dear," he told her.

Natalie responded, "Well I start course planning next week and classes after that, along with my research." Tom worried it might take a bit to co-ordinate their schedules. "But I am free this weekend. Not tomorrow night though, I have a prior engagement."

"How does dinner Sunday sound?" he asked hopefully.

"I am free for dinner tomorrow if you wanted something sooner sir. My engagement is my trainer at 9:30." She gave him such hope when she said that. She wanted sooner.

"Tomorrow night then. Say 1800, sorry, 6 pm?"

Natalie chuckled for the third time during their conversation and Tom couldn't help but chuckle back. "I'm familiar with military time it's okay. My academic advisor was former military at Columbia so I learned pretty quick," she told him. He felt honored that she was sharing information about herself and her life with him. He wanted to know so much more. "Did you have a place in mind? I'm afraid I'm not familiar with Washington yet." She asked him shyly. Tom had to remind himself she was just 20 years old.

"The Marriott is easy enough to find and has a wonderful dining room and an excellent chef. This is my treat so please don't worry about the cost." He assured her, "It's also pretty quiet and private if you prefer."

She said, "Sounds wonderful and it's not to far from my apartment either so I can walk."

"Where did you get a place, if you don't mind me asking?" He was worried, there were some parts of the city that weren't acceptable for young ladies to be walking alone.

At his question she laughed full out and Tom loved the sound. "I have a place at Georgetown Historical Mall, actually a floor above Mr. Glover's office." And at that information Tom chuckled as well at the coincidence. He could understand her laughter more now.

"That's a nice building and a decent part of town. I will meet you at the Marriott tomorrow evening then. Have a good night Natalie," he told her.

"You too sir."

Tom took a deep breath, "You can call my Tom if you'd like. I don't expect anything too familiar until you are comfortable with it."

There was a pause on the other end, "Goodnight… Tom." She almost wanted to say it, Tom could tell. She might be desperate for family ties, to feel accepted and loved again.

They hung up and Tom sat is silence for some time. It took him a bit to realize he was crying. He hadn't cried since Janet's passing. This meant more to him that he obviously realized. His cell phone started ringing and he glanced at the clock, almost midnight now. "Morrow" he answered.

"Sir, we have a dead body in Shenandoah park, appears to be a marine. Who do you want on it? Special Agents Pacci and Gibbs are on call and are currently on cases." Dispatch informed him. It was an unusual occurrence that both his on call teams had other cases they were working on.

"What are their cases?" he asked.

"Pacci has the Norfolk rape case, the numerous petty officers sir. And Special Agent Gibbs team has been working the pentagon fraud case."

Tom knew the rape case was important to solve and many of the female petty officers stations at Norfolk were getting very nervous and Agent Pacci was narrowing in on a suspect and he didn't want to pull him away from that. The fraud case however could be passed off to a lower agent. "Get Agent Strickland to take over for Gibbs on Monday and tell Gibbs that this now takes priority."

"Did you want me to pull Strickland in on the weekend or just leave a message for the changeover on Monday?" dispatch asked for clarification.

Since the fraud case was slow going waiting the weekend was no big deal and knowing Strickland, she would pull the files from home and catch up to where Gibbs was at anyway. "Message only please."

Dispatch hung up and Tom realized it was long past time he went home. He finished signing the report he was reading before his eventful night and grabbed a stack of files to leave for Cynthia on Monday. He locked his office and the outer office and left the building before heading home. He took a very scenic route to pass by his granddaughters building, wondering which apartment was hers and just wanting to feel close for a moment. He went to sleep that night very anxious which was rare for him. He didn't get to be the director of NCIS with anxiety but something about meeting his granddaughter had him nervous and excited. But also, scared. He had lost too much family, he didn't want to lose anymore.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Natalie dressed carefully. The Marriott was somewhat fancy and she didn't want to embarrass her grandfather. Plus she was nervous. She wore a simple dark blue dress that had a boat neck neckline. It covered her ample chest. The dress was snug through the body and flowed off her hips down to her knees. She wore her only pair of dressy shoes, low closed toe kitten heels. She was horrible in heels. Always been such a klutz in them. She was wearing the only pair of pantyhose she owned that nearly matched her milky pale skin. Natalie hated the sun. She burnt. Evidence of this was the scattering of freckles across her nose and cheeks as well as her shoulders. She put a white cardigan over the dress as the night was cooling off.

Natalie's mom had been a make-up artist for Broadway when they lived in NYC and she picked up how to do subtle things. Nat had a very neutral look going except for her ruby red lips. Her deep auburn hair was pulled back into a low bun with a small barrette holding the layers at the front of her face back. It was silver and sparkled along with the small diamond studs she wore in her ears. Her only other jewelry was a small silver locket around her neck. In it was a picture of her mom and a lock of her own baby hair. It was her mother's and she swapped the picture of herself out for one of her mom. She grabbed her purse, a small grey handbag, and locked her apartment. She had 45 minutes to get to the Marriott and it was only a 30 minute walk away according to her internet search.

"Miss Kane, you look lovely," came the deep baritone she recognized as Ronald Glover.

She smiled at him as he was locking his office up, "I didn't know you worked on Saturdays," she remarked.

"Usually no, but had a client who wanted to meet. Where are you off to? A nice date?" he asked while he walked with her to the main doors.

"No, actually I am having dinner with Mr. Morrow," she said shyly as she ducked her head.

"Well if I may, he's a nice guy, you have nothing to worry about. I wouldn't have given you his information if I felt he wasn't worth meeting." He held the door for her and waved her off.

Natalie walked down the street and around the corner to go around the back side of the building smiling as she saw people working out and her trainer helping a guy by spotting him. She continued down the street marveling at how quiet the neighborhood was getting on a weekend evening. She also took note on her walk of a few restaurants in the area for future reference. She wasn't much of a cook and while the café in her building was nice she wanted a bit of variety.

There was a pizza place not far as well as a Chinese place. She was happy to see a sushi and Japanese cuisine place a few blocks away and an Italian restaurant across the street from it. There were a few other restaurants she couldn't determine their cuisine by their names. Near the Marriott there was a couple coffee shops and a couple more restaurants, though those looked to be more high end.

Natalie entered the Marriott at a quarter to 6 pm and walked across its lobby to the restaurant. A hostess was standing at the entrance. She was pretty. A little older than Nat with short blonde hair and hazel eyes. She wore a uniform with cat eye make-up and nude lips. Her nails were painted black and Natalie notice a class ring on her left ring finger. A promise ring likely she thought.

"Name please" the hostess asked. Natalie read her name tag as Shawna.

Natalie was nervous, she wasn't sure who's name to give. "Um, I'm meeting someone at 6. I'm Natalie Kane, he's Tom Morrow" she gave the names up suddenly feeling incredibly nervous. _Relax Nat, you can always leave if you feel uncomfortable and he's probably as nervous as you are._

Shawna smiled in reassurance seeming to understand the situation somehow, "Yes, Director Morrow made reservations this morning, he's actually already here, I'll take you to your table." She lead Natalie past a few tables, most occupied couples or business associates and near the windows was a booth and in it sat a man in his 50's or 60's. "Here you go," Shawna said gesturing to the booth and NCIS Director Tom Morrow rose from his seat to great her. "I'll be back with menus and Mathieu will be your server this evening," Shawna said before heading back to her post to grab menus.

Natalie held out her hand to shake and it was gently engulfed by her grandfather. She gripped him tighter when they shook and a slight smile appeared on his face making him look years younger. "Sorry, I was always taught to give a firm handshake," she said while blushing.

"It's a good skill, I'm afraid I'm still old fashioned and tend to be on the gentle side with women, you think I would learn by now," he chuckled. He gestured to the other side of the booth and Natalie sat while he sat opposite her. He had a tumbler with amber liquid in it which he set aside as Shawna dropped off menus.

"I know I'm early, but I hate to be late to things," Nat said as she picked up her menu to read the drinks list.

Tom chuckled, "I'm the same way and in my line of work its important. Never know what you might miss in conversations before meetings start."

A tanned man in his mid 30's came to their table. He was dressed similarly to Shawna but held a small black notepad and small pencil. "May I get you some drinks?" he asked with a slight French accent.

"I'll just take a water with a slice of lime please," Natalie ordered. Not being of age the impressive wine list was lost on her.

"I'll have the same, and my scotch is fine at just one." Tom replied. He blushed when he looked up at her, "I have to admit I stopped at the bar to get something to calm my nerves."

Natalie smiled, "That's fine, what kind is it? An old professor of mine had a preference for Glenfiddich."

"Macallan. I developed a taste for it when my predecessor introduced me to it."

Natalie smiled and then looked back down at her menu, lost for what to say next. Tom did the same. It wasn't easy to carry on a conversation with someone you just met, let alone someone who is family. Mathieu returned with their waters and left to give them time to look over the menu. "What's good here?" Nat asked looking up into the steely eyes of the man across from her. He had wisdom in those eyes, but also a sadness. But when he looked at her it was like the sadness bled away to joy.

"The chef here does excellent work. The steak, salmon and foix gras are my favorites." He chuckled at her expression when he said foix gras. "Not a fan of fine cuisine?" he asked her.

"It's not that, I'm just not interested in things like foix gras, escargot, well I suppose fine French cuisine" she chuckled. "I do however have a liking for Japanese, sushi, and Italian. Oh and Mexican, the real stuff not Taco Bell."

"Sushi?" he said with a gross look on his face. "Couldn't eat raw fish."

She smiled while reading the menu, "You know its not all raw fish. In fact there are many maki rolls that don't contain raw fish. They even have vegetarian rolls."

"Oh God, please tell me you aren't a vegetarian," he exclaimed.

Mathieu had arrived and to answer her grandfathers question she order a steak, medium-rare with mushroom sauce. "And your sides Mademoiselle?"

"What are my choices?" she asked. She found she could determine what was good based on how a server responded. The slight inflections in their voice as they names the sides often gave way to their favorites, if you paid attention.

"We have your choice in roasted potatoes, mashed of course, baked potato, there is also mixed seasonal vegetable. Tonight is a combination of green beans, peas, carrots and cauliflower. You have the option of wild rice as well as soup or salad. Salads are house and Caesar. House comes with your choice of dressing: French, Italian, Balsamic and chef Torren's own blend of spices in a vinaigrette. Tonight's soups are tomato bisque and French wedding." Mathieu leaned closer and stage whispered, "That's like Italian wedding but with a red wine reduction as its base."

"I'll have the mixed vegetables with a house salad, the chef's dressing please." Mathieu had a lot of respect for that particular dressing and the seasonal vegetables were always a favorite of Natalie's.

Their server nodded then turned to Tom, "And you sir?"

"I'll have the salmon with wild rice and a bowl of tomato bisque please. And can I get extra sauce on the side for the salmon?"

Nodding again Mathieu said, "Certainly sir," before walking away to place their order.

"I find the lime cilantro pesto sauce quite good and like to add it to my rice or potatoes, depending on what I have." Tom explained to her.

"That sounds delicious, I may have to try the salmon another time." Natalie became nervous again. They were without their menus, so nothing to distract them from each other and it would be at least 20 minutes before their server came with their food. "I was sorry to read that your wife passed, as well as your son" she said taking a sip of her water.

"Yes, Janet lost her battle with breast cancer, not many people knew. Tom has been gone a few years now. He was awarded a silver star for his valor." Tom Sr. responded sipping his own water. "I'd hate to ask, I don't want to upset you, but would you mind telling me what your mother was like? I understand if it's too painful." He took a sip of his scotch this time.

"No it's fine." Natalie put aside her water. She had prepared herself somewhat to talk about her mom. It would be important to him and it was good for her to reminisce. It also meant someone other than her could remember her mom.

"She was a great mom. Never seemed shocked at my intelligence growing up. In fact, she pushed me to challenge myself. When I was 4 she took a cosmetology course and did make up for events and weddings and things. I remember studying geography while she was studying and she'd let me make maps with her eye shadows and lipsticks. When I graduated high school, I was only 14. Most kids my age were just starting. She was so proud though. Didn't matter to her that I didn't have many friends and she always stood up for me when kids would bully me."

"You were bullied?" Tom asked, worry on his face.

"Yes, small town, kids can be mean to someone who is different. Mom always reminded me that different wasn't bad. That I was special, and people like to put down what's special because they don't know what makes them special yet. She was happy to move to NYC when I was accepted to Columbia. It was a full scholarship. I lucked out on that with my education. My intellect gets me to go to school for free I guess. She started working on Broadway as a makeup artist. Even worked on Cats. I got to see a lot of shows from behind the scenes. And we had this sweet old lady landlord that would be there with me when mom had to work late. Mrs. Esposito passed when after I got my undergrad, she was there for my graduation. Her son took over the building and he was always good to us."

"What did she like to do? Other than take care of you?" Tom asked, alternating between his scotch and water while she talked.

"Mom loved books. Mostly true crime and mysteries. She had a weakness for smutty romance though. Thought I didn't know about them. We had a cat growing up, Mr. Whiskers. She would teach him tricks like sitting pretty, turning around in a circle and fetch. She was nice to everyone but was fiercely protective of me. It took her many months to get used to my boyfriend."

"You have a boyfriend?" he asked her.

"Not anymore, he went to Stanford for medical school. He was really smart like me, just a couple years older and we dated in college. It started out as just studying and being friends. There weren't many young teenagers in our classes. We keep in touch, he's actually looking to propose to his girlfriend who's a nurse at an old age home. He's completing his residency in San Francisco." I told him.

"I see, was afraid I'd have to continue you're mother's protectiveness and do a background check," he joked. But Natalie could see in his eyes that it was not out of the question. He would likely look into anyone she got close with. She didn't mind that.

Mathieu came around with there dinners and a promise to be back soon with refills on their waters. The food smelled so good Natalie couldn't help but dig in. It was then that something completely unexpected happened, "Would you like to try a bit of my salmon, my dear?" her grandfather asked while offering a small bit to her. She nodded and he placed it at the edge of her plate. When she tried it she found it was quite good and went back to her steak which was cooked to perfection.

They ate in a comfortable silence for some time before Natalie got the courage to ask her first question of the evening. "Could you tell me a bit more about yourself?" she asked shyly.

"Of course," he replied around a bite of salmon. He swallowed, "I've been the director of NCIS for 5 years now. It's been a challenging but rewarding job. I have to admit that I am rather protective of those in the navy and marines. NCIS exists not only to investigate crimes committed by naval personnel but also protect them. They work so hard at keeping out country safe it feels like the least we can do."

"I've always been a supporter of our military myself. I may not always understand why our country does what it does, or even agree, but I know the men and women in the armed forces are only following orders and deserve our support," Nat responded before taking a bite of her veggies. "Have you always worked for NCIS?"

"No, I was a senators aide when I was younger and after an incident of an assault at the pentagon and I met my first NIS agent, as they were back then, I enrolled in the FLETC. That's the Federal Law Enforcement Training Centre," he explained. "I applied to various agencies upon graduation and was gladly offered a job with NIS. I started as an agent then took my experience on capital hill to the administrative side of things."

"It sounds very interesting." She was finding she was nervous again. She was rapidly eating her meal and didn't want her evening to be over just yet.

Tom decided he was curious about this shy young lady in front of him, "What about yourself, you have degrees in biology and psychology," he started, "do you have any plans after your doctorates?"

Natalie had to think for a moment. She had thought of medical school at one point but fell in love with the mind and found herself constantly intrigued by the thoughts and feelings of others. The biology doctorate was mostly in hopes of continuing to study neurobiology as it helped her better understand the brain and she told him as much. "I'm not sure what I'd like to do with everything when I'm done. Perhaps open a practice. I do find I've become more and more interested in the criminal behavior and have actually been looking to do my doctoral thesis on something within that range."

"You should look into working with law enforcement for it then. They often have varying cases, and I know from experience the toll it can take on the officers themselves. Many agencies and departments have psychologists on hand to help them manage. You seem very compassionate and understanding. Patience is key too. Men in particular don't like talking about their feelings. Janet used to have to drag what was wrong out of me." Tom chuckled in memory.

"Is it much different investigating crimes in the navy?" Natalie wondered out loud as she finished off her meal.

Tom was just finishing his rice when he responded, "In some ways it can be. The crimes remain the same but the policies in place and rules and regulations regarding the crimes and how to investigate change."

Natalie was becoming more and more interested, not so much in the crimes themselves but the type of people who investigated them. She imagined the psychological toll for them could be quite debilitating. "Out of my own curiosity, would I be able to talk to a few agents, just to see the psychological effects?" she asked.

"I would be glad to see if a few would be willing. What is going on in that head of yours you seem like some of my agents when they are following a lead?" Tom asked. She must have looked intrigued. Her mother always said she got this look in her eye when she found something interesting.

"Well to be honest I'm thinking about a paper I read last year. A psychologist had done studies on the emotional damage and mental health side effects of medical examiners and it made me think of the people who investigate crimes. I had thought of seeing about doing my paper with metro police officers but I think NCIS agents and their counterparts could be much more rewarding."

"I can look into it if you'd like. If it is something you would like if you do up a formal proposal I can take it to SecNav to sign off on." Tom responded.

Natalie asked, "I'm sorry what or who is a SecNav?"

Tom chuckled before he responded, "It's the short hand we use for the Secretary of the Navy, he is my boss so to speak."

Natalie nodded in understanding as Mathieu came by to take their dishes, "Did you enjoy your meals?" he asked. "Would you like any desserts this evening?" Natalie shook her head. She was stuffed and she still had her first appointment with her trainer after this.

"No Mathieu I think we are good." Her grandfather handed over a credit card, "Would you put the meal on this for me please?" After their server walked away Tom checked his watch, "Would you like a ride home? I'm worried about you meeting your trainer on time, I'm afraid we took up more time than I anticipated." He smiled at her before adding, "Not that I'm complaining."

"I hadn't realized the time, yes a ride would be welcome, I have to change before I meet with Ephraim. He owns and runs the gym in my building."

Tom nodded his head, "I've heard of the place, I hadn't realized they did personal training this late though." Mathieu arrived at their table with Tom's card, a receipt and a small white box.

"For you director, the chef wanted you to have some of your favorite white chocolate truffles to go, on the house."

Tom smiled, "I've been coming here for years and I'm afraid they know me too well. You should take one before I drop you off, if anything to eat later. They are worth the extra calories."

"I will gladly have one," she said. "And I know trainers generally don't make appointments this late but it was a special situation." She took a deep breath before she explained to Tom her biggest fear and why she was doing this. "I had a very bad situation happen back in New York, it actually led to the accident that mom died in. Someone became aggressive and stalker like and I never want to feel like I did that day. I froze. Despite all my learning with psychology and how to help people I couldn't do anything." She sighed, her grandfather looked murderous, and she knew it was not at her, but at the man who had done this to her. "Ephraim Hyatt used to be a part of Mossad. He is going to teach me Krav Maga."

"Dangerous martial arts, but worth knowing." Tom stood with her to leave the hotel. "I know we have just met, but I want you to be safe, and feel safe. If there is ever anything I can do please let me know. Now who was this…" he paused trying to come up with a word she figured, "excuse my language, but fucker."

Natalie laughed. Here was such a proper man with manners who held doors for her and called her 'my dear' and when push came to shove, he had to swear. "You don't have to worry, they are pretty sure they recovered his body out of the Hudson. It's unidentifiable but they are waiting for results to come back."

Tom nodded his head in understanding and took a sigh of relief. "Let me know when they have the results," he asked and Natalie nodded her ascent. They walked up to a very nice looking Lexus in a dark color and he drove the few minutes back to her building. He pulled up to the front entrance and put his four-ways on. "It has been wonderful talking and getting to know you Natalie." He seemed as awkward and she felt.

"Could I hug you?" she asked very shyly. He just reached over and embraced her as his answer. Natalie felt herself tear up, "I'm glad you found me, grandpa," she whispered.

"Me too kiddo," he replied. They pulled apart and Natalie saw the tears shining in his eyes. He reached over and wiped the ones that had started to fall down her cheeks. She smiled and reached into her purse. She pulled out a small piece of paper and handed it to him. "Your numbers?" he asked reading them.

"Yes, I decided if tonight went well, I wanted you to be able to contact me too." They wished each other good night and Natalie walked into her building. She turned around once inside the doors and saw that he waited to see her safely inside before driving away. Natalie had a good feeling about him. He was strong, capable and fiercely protective. He felt like family to her, more than any other family member of hers with the exception of her mom. She felt like maybe, just maybe, DC was a good fit for her. She hurried upstairs to change and go meet up with Ephraim.


	4. Chapter 4

**I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who's following my story. I've also appreciated the reviews. I have a lot going on right now but will try to update once a week. I like to stay a few chapters ahead of what I'm posting. I'm just getting into writing where I'm referencing episodes. You will find I won't steer too far from what's happening as best I can but I won't pull directly from the episodes either, mostly because Natalie isn't an agent. Let me know what you think when we start getting into the nitty gritty. I'm also trying not to go too out of character for the team. We all love them for who they are. Let me know what you think.** **Enjoy!**

Chapter 4

A week later and Natalie had her formal proposal ready and an attached letter from her academic advisory stating that he felt that Natalie would be a wonderful candidate for such a necessary study. After a bit of research she discovered the mental health of investigators hadn't be studied much and that felt like some sort of disrespect to those that sacrificed themselves to hunt down criminals. She knew from some of her preliminary research that NCIS took cases that ranged anywhere from fraud and theft as well as drug abuse and violent crimes. She was looking forward to interviewing special agents and hoped she could get interview with some of the support staff as well. She also started looking into the Navy and Marine Corps to better understand her subjects work environment.

She also had her classes planned out. One, Introduction to Human Anatomy, was a first year undergraduate course she was taking over for a professor on sabbatical. It was planned out in advance for her and she only had to make a few adjustments to her own personal style. She also had to teach a Psychology course. This one was the Stereotyping and Social Cognition course. It was resurrected this year when enough students signed up. It was something Natalie found fascinating herself and had studied at Columbia. She also found that her masters thesis on Transgendered Identity research would be very beneficial for the class and was looking forward to teaching it. She was a little nervous as this would be a course of her own design but looked forward to the challenge. She had gotten over her jitters about helping and teaching in a class when she was working on her masters' degrees. She mostly taught tutorials which were smaller groups from the class itself but attended the lectures as often as she could.

She spoke with her grandpa last night, as had been a nightly thing for them. Sometimes it would be earlier in the evening and others it would be later. He asked her how her Krav Maga lessons were going as well as school. He was always interested in how her day was. He told her a visitors pass would be waiting for her at NCIS headquarters on the Navy yard. She just had to give her name to security and they would call for someone to bring her to his office this morning. She was actually very excited to see where he worked and to see the Navy yard. Her taxi pulled up to the main security gate on the yard and the driver wound her window down so the officer could speak with her.

"Name and business today ma'am?" the young man asked. Natalie wished she knew more to know if he was Navy or Marine and what his rank was.

"Natalie Kane, to see Director Morrow, he's expecting me" replied Natalie. He checked a clip board for her name while another officer with a dog walked around the car. When they nodded to the man speaking to her he gave the taxi driver directions to the building and doors she needed to go to.

"Register with security when you enter and they will take care of you from there. Have a good day ma'am." He walked back to his booth while the other officer and dog went to their own.

"Been a while since I've had a fare out this way, glad he told me where to go," her driver said to her with a chuckle. He mentioned when he picked her up that he was retired now and only came in when they got super busy. Apparently a Monday morning the week before Labor Day weekend was busy in DC.

They pulled up and Natalie paid her fare and grabbed her bags. She thanked the driver and entered the doors. Upon entering she saw a rather serious looking security set up like one would see at an airport. There was a small line up of people but most seemed to work there and almost proceeded as if on autopilot. Natalie placed her bags on the conveyor belt to be x-rayed and walked through the metal detector. The security guard at the other end asked for her name since she wasn't displaying an ID card.

"Natalie Kane," she responded and held out her arms when he gestured with his wand. She beeped upon going in and it was her apartment keys she had forgotten to place in a bucket. "Sorry about that," she told him.

"No problem ma'am, happens all the time." Another guard was calling someone and they told her to wait on a bench nearby as someone would be down for her in a minute. She looked at them with a confused face, how did they know she needed a guide? Do they know, or do they do this with every visitor she wondered. "Director Morrow informed us you would need an escort," said the mind reading guard. She chuckled and nodded her head at him before taking her seat.

She didn't wait long before a beautiful woman came walking up to her with her hand held out, "Miss Kane?" she asked.

"That's what my pass says," joked Natalie. The woman smiled and they shook hands. She was taller than Natalie by a few inches, with dark very curly hair. She was darker skinned and introduced herself and Cynthia.

"If you'll come with me to the elevator," Cynthia explained and led her to an elevator. "I'm the directors secretary and personal assistant. He's been talking about you all week. Just to me though. So don't feel like everyone knows who you are. He is not the kind of person who gossips about his personal life." Cynthia was sweet and they entered an empty elevator. She pressed a button for the 3rd floor and away they went.

"What has he said about me?" Natalie wondered out loud.

Cynthia smiled at her, "Not much, just a little background for me, that you are his long lost granddaughter and that you were going to be bringing by a formal proposal to do some research study with the agency for your doctorate." The elevator stopped at the 2nd floor and two people came on and up they all went for the 3rd floor. "Once everything is approved I'll be the one to get you your Identification paperwork together and put through so you don't need to have an escort every time you visit."

The elevator stopped with another ding at the 3rd floor and their riding companions exited and went their separate ways. Cynthia led Natalie past a bunch of cubicles with people hard at work. She heard someone yell 'DiNozzo' at someone and kept following Cynthia up the stairs. "The directors office is just up here" she said and led her to a silver door. Cynthia scanned her badge and the doors automatic locks released. Inside was a small reception area. It contained a desk that Natalie assumed was Cynthia's and a small couch opposite it. There were a couple plotted plants and a beautiful view out the window of the Navy yard. Across from the entrance was another steel door. This one was open. And upon hearing their entry her grandfather appeared.

"Thank you Cynthia," he said to his assistant and welcomed Nat inside. "How was the ride over? Traffic wasn't too bad?" he asked her as he shut his door.

Natalie stood awkwardly in his office. It was huge and she didn't know where to sit. He had a desk with two chairs opposite it. There was also a conference table and a small casual seating area. "No traffic was okay," she said and followed him over to the two sofas at the far side of the room. They sat on separate sofas and Natalie pulled out her proposal to put on the coffee table before them. "The driver was very informative. He's lived here his whole life and was giving me bits of trivia."

"That's good to hear," Tom responded. "Is this your proposal?"

"Yes, Dr. Edward Carpenter is my academic advisor, he's included a letter on my behalf as well." She told him.

"Wonderful, now, how is your Krav Maga going?" he asked her. He spotted the bruise along her collar bone that she told him about recently.

She chuckled, "Slowly, or at least that's how it feels to me. Eph says I'm a fast learner. I feel like all my bruises and aches say otherwise."

Tom chuckled with her. He knew a few members of Mossad as their agencies worked together at times, he knew from their stories it was a rough learning curve but worthwhile in the end. "Yes it's not the most delicate of fighting techniques. But you seem to be enjoying what you are learning from our phone calls."

She smiled, "It's interesting. Eph keeps reminding me to not get discouraged and frustrated that I'm just a beginner still."

"Of course, did you have anything else going on today?" asked Tom.

"Not until my session with Eph tonight. I've got everything together for classes in two weeks and I've got a few journals at home I'm reading for my thesis."

Tom smiled and rose picking up her proposal in the process, "Excellent, I'm going to give this to Cynthia on our way out and SecNav will be signing off on it."

Natalie rose in shock. "What?"

"I spoke with him on the weekend and he is 100% on board with your research study. He just needed the proposal to sign off on some paperwork with and to have something on file for what you will be doing, and now I'm going to give you a personal tour if you'd permit me to. And I'd like to be able to introduce you as me granddaughter if that's alright. I know you'll get less flack if agents know in advance." Tom walked her out of his office and handed the proposal to Cynthia, "Can you fax a copy to SecNav with the paperwork and get started on the identification for Miss Kane please?"

"Already set up sir, just make a stop at security and they can finalize a badge and have it ready next time she visits." Cynthia then winked at her, clearly she knew all along how this was going to proceed, "Just give security a call when you come back and they will ensure to have your badge at the front gate for you" she told Natalie.

Natalie felt stunned. She wasn't sure if this would go through so quickly, or at all really. She was happy. She hoped she would help some of the individuals with their issues and help them cope with the stresses of the job. She had been looking back into some of her studies with regards to work related stress and coping with traumatic events. She hoped it would come in handy for her.

Tom lead her from the offices and stopped with her at the balcony overlooking the cubicles and a wall that Natalie noticed was filled with Most Wanted pictures. "Behind us is MTAC, its our communication center and is a high security room. We conduct missions and have video conferencing from there." Natalie glanced back at the big MTAC works and saw more silver doors, one which had some special looking window at about eye height. She imagined it was for retinal scans. She knew with her proposal came a security check that would be done and that if everything went well should would be given a high level access in order to talk with agents about cases.

"Below is the bullpen. At least one. There are two more on the 2nd floor and one smaller one on this floor. Two groups of agents work below and some have to share desks. We also have agents posted at other locations on bases as well as what we call agents afloat, they work directly on boats, usually the larger ones like battleships and cruisers."

He led her down the stairs and stopped between some cubicle desks, "Agent Gibbs can I have a moment, I know you are busy with a case." A man with greying hair stood from his desk nodding his head for the director to continue.

Gibbs POV

He first noticed her when Cynthia brought her off the elevator. He wondered who she was. Obviously pretty young but her red hair caught his attention. He watched her covertly and couldn't help admiring her figure and beauty. He caught DiNozzo looking as well and yelled at him for it. DiNozzo went back to work but Gibbs watched the beautiful young woman until she disappeared into the directors office. He missed Kate giving him and update and noticed after she called his name.

Always a sucker for a redhead, focus Gunny he thought to himself and nodded along to what Kate was saying. She went back to her computer and DiNozzo started telling him what he found out from an interview with the dead lieutenants squad. Gibbs nodded and told them good work, but where is the damn weapon!

He watched the director come out of his office with the redhead talking with her and showing her a few things. He put his head back down to keep reading his emails. It was then he noticed and emergency notice from Cynthia. He opened it,

Attention All Personnel,

SecNav has authorized a doctoral candidate to conduct a research study on the effects on investigators and support staff when dealing with the stresses and traumatic events of the job. All Agents are expected to at least have one interview with doctoral candidate Natalie Kane and are encouraged to participate. Director Morrow will be giving her a tour today and be introducing her. Any questions and concerns should be directed to myself and a schedule for interviews will be sent along as soon as its been confirmed.

Thank you,

Cynthia Norton,

Assistant to the Director

Naval Criminal Investigative Service

Gibbs looked up when he heard the director address him and nodded his ascent. Now he knew who she was and why she was here. He didn't like the idea of having an interview but if it meant getting to watch her he was okay with that.

"I'd like to introduce Natalie Kane, she's a doctoral candidate that will be doing a research study with us. Further details will be forthcoming." the director addressed them.

"Why hello there," Tony said getting up to shake her hand, "Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, Tony."

Morrow glared at him, "She's also my granddaughter."

Natalie was grinning and holding back a laugh. Tony looked properly chastised. "I'm Catelyn Todd, Kate." The ladies shook hands and Kate went back to her desk. "What kind of research study are you doing?"

Gibbs piped up, "Check your email Kate."

"Oh" Kate said, while bringing up her email.

DiNozzo read it off "A study of the psychological effects of our jobs. Interesting."

Natalie smiled at them, "I promise to be gentle. And I would never ask you to disclose anything you are uncomfortable with." Morrow then directed her to the front of Gibbs desk.

"This is Senior Special Agent Gibbs," Morrow introduced him. He stood up and shook her hand.

"Nice to meet you." Gibbs was captivated by her eyes. He had never seen such pale blue eyes. Even Shannon's eyes weren't that pale. They were beautiful. He could see the intelligence and vulnerability behind them. He wanted to know her story, more than he had with anyone really. This was dangerous. She was far too young for him and she was the director's granddaughter. It would only pose trouble. He needed to keep himself focused on treating her like he treated Abby, like a daughter.

"You too sir." She said to him.

He chuckled, "Not a sir." He sat back down and told her just to call him Gibbs. When they walked away to continue their tour Gibbs couldn't help checking out her ass. Goddamnit he thought getting mad at himself. "I'm getting coffee" he told his team before walking off. He needed to clear his head.

It been too long since he'd been intimate with a woman. He should call Cecile and see if she was free this week. She was his latest lady friend and they were keeping things pretty casual. She picked him up and dropped him off on occasion and it drove his team nuts. He smile thinking of the last time they were together. It was good. Not great but good. Neither were interested in marriage, which made him grateful. He'd tried since Shannon and Kelly's death but it never seemed to work out right. No one could replace Shannon, and no one ever really came close to her personality. It was hard for many women to handle his job over the long run. Maybe he'd find someone one day, but at his age, he doubted it.


	5. chapter 5

**its been a long tough week, sorry it took so long... its short but I'll try to get 6 up tomorrow or next day.**

Chapter 5

They had just finished touring the second floor was were about to head to the basement. There was an evidence garage, normal garage and forensics. Lastly would be autopsy and her grandfather ensured her that the ME wouldn't have any bodies out. It had been a while since Natalie worked with a cadaver and she wasn't sure she could handle it again so soon.

"Abby, are you here?" Tom called into the forensics lab. Heavy metal music was playing from somewhere and a tall woman with dark hair in pigtails poked her head out from the farther room.

"I'm here." She said with confidence. Natalie was jealous of that. She was dressed very unconventionally and Natalie was warned of this. She had a plaid short skirt on with a black t-shirt with what Natalie assumed was a band logo on it. She had tall black platform boots and fishnets as well. It looked good on her.

"Abby, I'd like to introduce Natalie Kane-" said Tom.

Abby interupted "Oooh, yes, I read the email from Cynthia, it's nice to meet you." Abby walked up and shook her hand.

"It's nice to meet you as well," Natalie responded.

"I have a question though," Abby stated. Natalie nodded her head and Abby continued, "Do I really have to have an interview with you? No offense but therapists and psychology people intimidate me."

Natalie couldn't imagine how anyone could intimidate her, "You don't really have to but it would be nice to see how your job effects you. I know you don't have to go to crime scenes but with processing of evidence and all the things you learn about victims I think it would be an interesting perspective that most people wouldn't think of. But I understand how intimidating it can be. We can share information so you don't feel like I'm learning all about you and you know nothing of me."

Abby seemed to think about it for a minute, "That may work, you wanna see the lab?" she asked.

"It would be an honor."

Tom had been checking his cell phone. It must have vibrated on his hip. He looked to Abby, "Miss Scuitto if its not too much trouble would you mind showing Natalie the lab and then take her down to autopsy and I will try to catch up with you ladies there, I have an emergency I need to deal with."

Abby nodded and Tom left to deal with whatever it was going on. "I'm actually not too busy at the moment. Until Gibbs's team finds the murder weapon I don't have too much to do. I was just typing up some reports for others when you guys came in."

Abby showed her around. The outer room had a lot of forensic equipment and computers for Abby to work on and the inner room was where she did ballistics and a few other things that wouldn't be safe to do in the other room. There was also a back entrance that actually led to a hallway and stairwell that took you down to the sub-basement where autopsy was located. It was through there that Abby took Nat downstairs.

"Hey Ducky!" Abby called out as they walked through the automatic doors. "This is Natalie, the director had to leave and asked if I'd bring her down."

"Why hello Miss Kane," came the voice of the elder ME. He sounded British or Scottish, Natalie wasn't sure which. "I'm Dr. Donald Mallard, most people call me Ducky."

"Like the waterfowl," Natalie said with a smile. They shook hands and he introduced her to his assistant, a younger African American man named Gerald. "Nice to meet you both," said Natalie.

"Well there's not much to see in autopsy I'm afraid," said Ducky, "We have our coolers for the bodies and a few exam tables. A desk and a supplies closet. More like a room really." Ducky gestured towards the side of the desk where another door sat. "I'm reminded of how lucky we are for the space. I worked in a small morgue in downtown Edinburgh when I was younger. There were two medical examiners besides myself and we were often stepping on each others toes just trying to do our jobs."

"Ducky always has stories," Abby explained. "He's like a master of trivia too."

Ducky blushed, "Well I wouldn't go that far. I just like to think I've lived and interesting life."

"I'd love to hear about it sometime." Natalie said smiling.

"Yes, I think your research study is quite fascinating. I'd be honored to be a part of it and you are welcome to interview me as much as you'd like, my dear."

Natalie smiled and made a mental note to let Cynthia know that Doctor Mallard would be a subject for her research, "Thank you Ducky, I would really enjoy seeing into the side of investigations from a medical examiner's perspective as well as how it effects your life."

"And I will be happy to tell you about it all. I've an interest in forensic psychology myself, maybe one day I will head back to school again. Would you permit me to read your dissertation when you are done?" he asked.

"Certainly, if I'm lucky I may get published this time. My academic advisor feels pretty confident that the subject matter would make it into a couple of psychology journals. I'm less sure myself," she told him.

"Oh, I think it would be fascinating enough to be published," Ducky told her.

Abby chimed in with, "Me too. As much as I'm nervous about you knowing all my secrets just from looking at me, I still think psychology is interesting too."

Natalie was blushing. She wasn't as used to being welcomed for her intelligence as she was. NCIS personnel seemed to make her feel normal. In New York, she was still looked down on because of her age and in some cases there were professionals that resented her. She was used to having to prove herself to everyone. "Thank you," she told them.

"You seem young to be getting a doctorate," Gerald said to her. He didn't look at her like most did when they questioned her age, he seemed intrigued.

"Yes, I graduated high school at 14. Undergrads in Biology and Psychology by 17 and my masters just this past spring in both. As much as I loved Columbia and New York I was happy to accept Georgetown and move to DC. I needed the change." She told them a little about herself after that, coming from a small town, losing her mother and the Director finding her.

"How fortunate for you. I hadn't realized our dear director had any grandchildren." Ducky exclaimed.

"I'm the only one apparently."

"So are you going for Biology as well as Psychology, "Abby asked her.

Natalie smiled, "I am actually. I am looking into the neurobiology to help better understand the human brain and how we think, feel and deal with things."

"That's pretty cool." Abby was sweet and Natalie was liking her more and more. She just hoped she could make her feel comfortable about an interview. As much as Natalie would love to have Abby in her study, she wasn't going to push her into it.

"With a biological background you could even be of help in autopsy if you wanted to" Gerald commented.

"Oh Gerald, the young lady probably has a different plan in life. Not everyone has an interest in forensic science and medical science. Those of us that do are usually like yourself and come from a family of funeral directors, embalmers and what not." Ducky teased Gerald openly, it was clear to Nat that they got along very well.

"Actually Dr. Mallard, I hadn't fully decided what I wanted to do. I originally planned to open a practice in New York, but after my mom passed…" she paused, "I just don't see New York the same anymore. It wasn't something I was really passionate about, it was more an idea of mom's."

"Passion is key, I think" said Abby.

"Abby is right, you should find something you can truly enjoy." Her grandfather spoke as he stepped into the room. "I'm sure Dr. Mallard and his assistant would agree, you can't do a good job if it's not something you enjoy."

"Right you are director," Ducky said. "Well it was lovely meeting you Miss Kane and I look forward to our interviews."

"Thank you for the tour Abby, and I look forward to our talks as well Doctor." Natalie walked with her grandfather back to the elevator and the went to security. "Is everything alright, grandpa?" she asked him as they stepped off the elevator.

"Yes, just an emergency conference call with a director of another agency in MTAC. Apparently being asked to give information to an agent was asking too much of him. He would only give the information over in a video conference and I needed to be present." He looked irritated. Clearly some interagency issues arose despite the fact that they were supposed to co-operate with each other.

"Sorry to hear that. Happen often?" she asked as he held the door to the security office open for her.

He chuckled, "More often than I would like."

"Director" said the middle aged woman behind the counter, "How may we help you today?"

"This is Susan, she's our day time security manager," he explained to Nat. "This is Natalie Kane, my assistant should have sent over her information, she needs a photo done up for her security badge."

Susan led her past the desk and over to a small corner with a camera and stool set up. Natalie sat and got her picture taken. Susan escorted her back around the desk and told them she could have a temporary badge done up by tomorrow but one with Natalie's security clearance wouldn't be ready until the end of the week.

"That's alright, I don't think I can make it back until the end of the week anyway" Natalie told her.

Susan smiled, "Then I will just wait 'til the clearance comes back. We have the background check done already but because of the highly classified nature of much of what NCIS deals with the military and Homeland Security as well as FBI and CIA will need to come back first."

Natalie hadn't realized just how many agencies would need to give her the okay before she could start her project. Tom must be pushing things through a little faster for her. They thanked Susan for her time and left. Tom walked Natalie back to the front doors where she handed her visitors pass back over to security. They said their goodbyes and Tom told her she would be getting a ride back with an agent rather than taking a taxi. The agent in question was heading into the city for follow up interview and didn't mind taking her home.

Natalie walked outside to be met by one of the first agents she met. Kate, she recalled. "Agent Todd, I appreciate the ride" she told her.

Agent Todd smiled, "I don't mind, the director asked if anyone was heading in to save you the trouble of another taxi and I'm going nearby to meet up with a witness." Kate walked her over to a dark blue sedan and they got in.

"Do you often have to go by yourself?" asked Nat.

Kate laughed, "No it can change around a fair bit. Tony, Agent DiNozzo, wanted to take it but Gibbs overruled him and sent me instead." Natalie nodded and they were soon on their way out the front gate. "If you couldn't tell, Tony has a thing for ladies and the witness is an attractive female." They both laughed. Natalie could tell. The way he introduced himself to her, she knew right away he was a ladies man and loved every minute of it. He was not her type. She picked up on a little bit of tension between Agents Todd and DiNozzo though and wondered if they didn't get along.

"How long have you worked for NCIS?" Nat asked.

"Only a few months, before that I was Secret Service."

Natalie found that interesting and wondered what would make someone jump agencies like that, "I would love to get your story sometime" she told Kate.

"And I would be glad to give it Miss Kane." Kate then explained, "My older sister is actually a psychologist and I have no problem being a part of your study. I know from her dissertation that everything is kept annonymous so I don't have to worry too much there."

Natalie was grateful. She only expected to hand in her proposal today and here she was leaving with no only the acceptance but also two willing participants in her study. She couldn't wait to email her advisor to let him know the good news.


	6. Chapter 6

**As promised. Glad you guys are liking this so far. I'm a little writers blocked this week so I'm not getting any ahead on the story itself, which is exactly why I like to be ahead of what I'm posting. I'm trying not to rush anything and make everything feel more natural. Let me know what you think, I've been appreciating the positive comments.**

Chapter 6

Natalie locked up her apartment and headed downstairs to meet with Ephraim. It was Thursday and her left shoulder was still sore from the maneuvers she was learning Monday night. Tonight was going to be rough she knew but she also enjoyed working with Eph. He hated his full name and said only his mother and his boss would use his full name. He preferred Eph. He was in remarkable condition for his age and considering some of what he had been through. He left Mossad after being shot three times in the lower spine. He wasn't even sure if he'd be able to walk again let alone move the way he could. He needed physical therapy still at times and often went to a massage therapist for nerve damage in his right hip that would act up at times.

Eph was in his 40's and had been with Mossad for over a decade. He was on a mission when he met his wife. She was from the states and had been studying in Syria at the time. They fell in love and when he was shot, on that very mission, it was she that stayed by his side in the hospital. She even transferred schools to Tel Aviv while he was undergoing his operations and physical therapy. When he was given his discharge from Mossad, he asked her to marry him. They moved in with her family at first and have been happily married for 10 years now. She got a job as a translator in Washington 5 years ago and they moved from West Virginia. He opened his gym with the money he had gathered while working for Mossad and their lives seemed quite complete.

Ephraim could speak 6 languages but was only truly fluent in Hebrew, English and Arabic. He picked up French and Persian early on in his career with Mossad and was learning Pashtu from his wife. He held black belts in aikido and judo and studying boxing when he was a teenager. Krav Maga came in his secret agent days. He said that Krav Maga was like the bastard child of a lot of other disciplines. It was as if they borrowed and stole from the others and created something much more dangerous and potentially deadly.

Natalie scanned her card at the inner doors and walked into the gym. A couple of people were using machines and another person was using the weights. Eph was busy at his front desk working away at something. Natalie was 10 minutes early for her appointment, as per usual. He looked up and smiled. He wasn't much taller than Nat, which really helped her feel comfortable enough with him to want to take one of his other classes. He convinced her to do private lessons and that he would teach her Krav Maga. It wasn't one of his regular courses but upon hearing her story and asking a few questions he felt she would do best with it. As he put it, "Krav Maga will give you skills for your size and you can go up against just about anyone regardless of their size. The others will teach you techniques but your size could still be a disadvantage against a larger male in particular." He sold her on it. He also cut her a deal as his private lessons were usually more expensive. He hated to see women feel scared and felt as if it was his duty to help them in any way he could. He admitted he even taught his wife a few things for his own peace of mind.

"Evening Natalie," he said to her, his voice still heavy with an Isreali accent, "How have you been since Monday?"

She rolled her left shoulder tentatively and it still sent a slight pain down her arm, "My left shoulder is still sore from what we were doing."

"No problem, I can change up what we do a bit to give it some more rest. Have you been using the rub I suggested for joints?" He had given her the name of a product from a natural therapy store in the city. He said it was better than what you get at most pharmacies and is very popular in Europe and the Middle East. He wasn't kidding.

"Yes, it's been a huge help, and the witch hazel you suggested is helping with my bruises as well." At first her academic advisor was afraid she was being abused, until she told him what she was learning. He didn't look at her with pity quite as much since she started using witch hazel. It helped with the swelling of new bruises as well as the coloring. She also found they weren't as sensitive to touch anymore either making it easier to keep going with her training and being grabbed or hit in the same spot until she figured out how to avoid Eph's moves.

He smiled and they walked into one of the classrooms. Eph had two. One was larger and built to take classes of approximately 20 students. The classes ranged from yoga to judo and spinning and jazzercise. He had a wonderful female trainer who was able to teach the softer classes while he took the heavier and martial arts classes. The smaller classroom was equipped with mats all over the floor, a punching bag as well as a few other self defense tools like the padded upper torso of a male on a stand. Eph taught smaller self defense classes of usually 5-8 students and his one-on-one studies.

Natalie walked to the far side and set her bag down on the bench that was along the window that faced the mall hallway. This room made her feel safe as very few people would actually see what she would be doing. The larger classroom's window faced the street. She went into her bag and pulled out her water bottle as past experience taught her she would be needing it multiple times over the next hour. She also brought out her wraps. Eph came over to help her wrap her hands but she waved him off, "I've been practicing," she told him and he nodded. Eph did not wrap his hands. He only did if he would be hitting a bag numerous times in a lesson and their one-on-one rarely called for him to show her a punch more than twice.

They started as always with Natalie punching the heavy bag as he called out the various types. Now that she was familiar with their names this was their warm up. After 10 minutes of her punches and a few kicks Natalie's heart was beating fast and she was sweating. They went through a few of the moves from Monday night, but at a slow pace to make sure Natalie remembered how to maneuver her body. Eph slowly started speeding up and threw in some attacks that Natalie learned to defend against last week. He caught her off guard and had her thrown to the mats within a few minutes. He praised her though as she lasted longer than usual and had done remarkably well when he started throwing in the different moves.

"We're going to start learning a bit more with legs tonight I think, one to give your shoulder a rest still, but also because you've learned some of the more basics with upper body. Once we throw in the lower body stuff I can start to show you how to put the two together and then work at some of the more aggressive attacks okay?" He said all this while grabbing the defense dummy. Nat started calling him Buddy, because he was her attack buddy.

45 minutes later and Natalie was sore. She had multiple bruises developing all along her legs. Her right ankle was sore from hitting the heavy bag wrong and Eph suggested wrapping it for a few days. "It's not broken or even sprained really, just a heavy hit" he told her when he checked it out. She sat on the bench huffing and puffing from all the heavy work and was finishing off the last of her second bottle of water. "You did well. Keep practicing the moves, even at slow motion, to get your body and muscles to remember how to move. The muscle memory will come in time."

Ephraim always made her feel good at the end of a class. It was clear that she would be woefully unprepared to go up against someone like him and it often made her feel frustrated that no matter what she did, what she learned, he always had a move to block her. He only did that to show her she still had more to learn, but was good enough to let her get her hits in and to successful perform a move to build her confidence. She appreciated that he always wanted her to feel like she was getting better and that she could do this. Their first class at the end she was nearly in tears and he stopped early.

"You are doing well, please don't feel bad." He rubbed her back as he sat her down and she started to cry in earnest, "It's okay to cry," he told her, "Is it pain?" he asked worried that perhaps this would be too rough for her.

"No, I'm upset," she told him while wiping tears, "I'm a perfectionist and I hate that I can't just seem to do this."

He nodded his head in understanding, "Remember that I have been doing this for nearly 25 years. When I started training it took me 2 weeks before I actually landed a punch on my trainer and I had studied boxing. It will come in time and no one learns it perfectly right away. It takes time. Be patient with yourself Natalie and allow yourself the chance to make mistakes and learn from them." She nodded her head in understanding and had to constantly remind herself that just because school came so easy to her did not mean this would too. It would take time. Be patient. Be patient. Learn from every misstep and failed hit.

Before she left the gym Eph brought her over to the desk. There was only one person in the gym when they exited the classroom. It was an older lady Natalie saw regularly. She came in late at night and walked on the treadmill. Ephraim said she was also in a few of the classes that they ran but she didn't trust people to go for walks anymore and she had trouble sleeping. She liked to walk at night but rarely felt safe. She lived a few blocks away and always took a taxi at night but would walk until she felt she could go home. Usually Eph or his other trainer, Sylvia, were here and they would drive her home.

"I have a couple things for you to borrow," he told her while he pulled a book and a dvd out from a cabinet. "This was my training guide when I started with Mossad. The book will break down attacks and defenses for you and the dvd is actually of my training class. They used to video us to help up better see how to move, where we needed to work etc. There's numerous videos you can watch so you can see the progress of a group and see how well you are doing." Natalie smiled. "I think you'll like the book, you do well with books" he told her smiling. He got such a kick out of her intelligence and book smarts. She was grateful that he would share these things with her.

She thanked him and left the gym to go back to her place and have a much needed shower. She was also going to have to put some ointment and witch hazel on tonight. She could only imagine what shape her legs were going to be in the morning and she was planning on going to NCIS HQ tomorrow. I guess a skirt is out of the question she thought to herself.

After a steaming hot shower and her rub down on her legs and shoulders Natalie finished her usual nightly routine. She brushed her teeth and braided her wet hair knowing if she didn't it would be a terror in the morning. She double checked her door was locked and set her coffee maker to go off in the morning. She took off her towel and dressed in a tank top and underwear. Her side of the building's air conditioner was on the fritz and with just a window and a fan it could get warm overnight still. She climbed into bed and took a sip of the water she kept at her bedside and took an ibeprophen to help with her aches and pains and slipped off to sleep.

When Nat woke the following morning and stepped from her bed her right ankle told her it was not happy to have weight put on it. She looked down and there was no bruising but a little bit of swelling. Before she did anything, even go get her coffee, she wrapped it. Her legs looked like a rosharch test and she chuckled to herself. Grabbing her coffee and adding a bit of sugar and milk to it she brought it back into the bedroom to sip while she got dressed.

Today she would be getting her NCIS security badge and they said they'd have it for her at the front gate. She really wished she could wear a skirt today with the heat wave that was hitting the city but there was no way she could go about with the way her legs looked. Too many people would have questions she wasn't ready to explain. She also had a few first interviews set up and she hoped a couple of them would submit to being subjects for her study.

She pulled out a pair of dressy capris and put them on. The one bruise on her shin wasn't that dark and she felt confident it wouldn't be too noticeable. She grabbed a short sleeved blouse and bra before getting dressed. After that she went to the bathroom and adjusted the few hairs that came loose from her French braid, grateful that for once her hair didn't go crazy on her in sleep. She put on a little bit of make-up and then took her coffee with her to the kitchen. She finished it and rinsed her cup before grabbing everything she would need for today.

In her bag she packed her wallet along with her personal effects she liked to keep with her. She put in a new notebook and multiple pens. She also put in her recorder so she could have more accurate notes later. She like to write down impressions and things she noticed or would like to discuss at a later date in her notebook and keep the interviews to the tape. She also grabbed a few items that would come in handy. She had a rubix cube, play dough and a string of beads. She found it helped people to talk sometimes if they had something to distract themselves and their hands with. It also helped with anxiety. She grabbed something she through Abby might like, it was a little voodoo doll and it seemed appropriate for the goth. She had their interview today and knew Abby would be nervous. She wanted her to feel comfortable and safe. She also planned on interviewing everyone in their regular workspace if she could.

She called for a taxi and went downstairs to the café. It was open and she ordered a muffin for breakfast and went to wait for her ride. I should look into getting my license, she thought to herself, then I could look into a car and I wouldn't have to take a cab everywhere. Natalie was not a fan of buses or subways. She was stuck on a stopped subway one time for over an hour and from that moment she had a fear of confined spaces in public. They only seemed to really bother her if she was surrounded by strangers.

Her ride wasn't long and she gave them the address for NCIS. Her driver was a talkative fellow and she didn't mind. She imagined driving people around all day could get boring. She had no problems talking with strangers, especially one-on-one. She loved hearing their life stories and matching their personalities to the various ones she studied. She really did love learning how people thought, felt and coped. She had decided it was definitely her passion, she just needed to figure out how that would work in a paying profession.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello readers! So this one is a little longer I think so bare with me. I'd also like to point out I am by no means a psychologist or biologist, anything I write about with regards to those things are just things I've read about or learned over the course of my life thus far. Next week will be a busy one for me so I may or may not get a chapter up then. I hope you guys like this. Enjoy!**

Chapter 7

Gibbs and his team were out on a call when Natalie was due at the office so he actually called to reschedule their interviews for them with Cynthia. Cynthia had taken a particularly liking for the director's granddaughter and made herself an honorary secretary for Natalie. DiNozzo and Kate were due to be interviewed this morning and he asked if they could be moved to the afternoon. Luckily, the case wasn't a dead body so Ducky was available to swap with them as was Cynthia herself. Gibbs appreciated the help and they went back to interviewing the Captain about the missing cargo.

Natalie arrived at NCIS and was excited to take her new badge. The security guard on duty had her sign off on also receiving a packet. It contained a map of the facility as well as security information and numbers she was to call if she needed anything. She thanked the older fellow and went in on her own as she knew where she was doing this time. She pressed the button for the elevator when her cell phone rang.

"Hello?" she asked.

"Natalie, it's Cynthia, I have a bit of bad news. Gibbs needed his team on a case this morning so I've had to reschedule some interviews around. Are you here yet?" asked Cynthia.

The elevator opened a couple people came off and she went in and pressed the button for the 2nd floor. "Yes, just getting in the elevator, I'll see you at your office for the update then if that's alright," confirmed Nat as the doors shut.

"See you-" was all Natalie managed to hear before the call cut off. The joys of elevators, she thought to herself. She exited on the second floor by herself and smiled to a few of the people who looked up from their desks. One gentleman actually stopped her.

"You're Miss Kane, right?" he asked her. He was about her height, friendly enough but he had what she was beginning to see as "cop face". He had dark brown hair and a neat appearance. Natalie noted that he had a holster for a gun that currently was not on his person.

She smiled at him, "Yes I am, can I help you?"

"I'm Special Agent Pacci, I wanted to set up an interview with you in person. DiNozzo has been talking all week how you would be in today and I thought today would be a good day to do it." He held out his hand in greeting and they shook.

Natalie pulled out her planner. Cynthia had been emailing her with updated on people who were setting up appointments through her and Natalie appreciated the sentiment of the gesture. "It's wonderful to meet you Special Agent, I've got openings next week on Thursday and Friday afternoon."

He smiled and led her over to his desk. His own planner already on his desk. He was an older agent and clearly preferred the pen to paper method much like Natalie did herself. "Unless I get a case I will be free all day Friday, I have to weekend shift."

Natalie grabbed her pencil and wrote Pacci under another agent's name. "I can come find you when I'm done with another subject then on Friday."

"And you can call me Chris." Natalie thanked him for taking the time to speak with her and wished him a good day. She walked past the empty looking bullpen and went upstairs to see Cynthia.

"Morning, Cynthia." Natalie was genuinely pleased to see the woman after a long week.

"Morning, so update is this: Agent Gibbs has his team in the field doing interviews and investigating a stolen cargo container that was due to be put on the 'Kennedy'. He assured me that he will have Agents DiNozzo and Todd back this afternoon so I've done a bit of reshuffling and you'll be doing your interview with me now and Doctor Mallard after that." Cynthia was smiling and looked beautiful this morning. "Are you okay doing mine here? I have to man the phone while the director is out to a meeting with the joint chiefs."

Natalie put her things down on the loveseat across from Cynthia's desk, "Not a problem, I'm comfortable anywhere." Natalie pulled out the standard non-disclosure agreement that they would both sign as a statement that their conversations would be between them and anonymous for her paper. She also pulled out an agreement to be signed that stated Cynthia would permit to being recorded. Natalie handed them over, "If you don't mind reading these and signing them, then I'll sign them as well. And for reference they stay in my locked briefcase until I get home and then they are put in a safe."

Cynthia read them over nodding her head in understanding before signing. Natalie took them back and signed in front of Cynthia. She then pulled out her recorder and notebook. "We can actually use the director's office," Cynthia told her, "It gives a bit more privacy and if someone comes it gives us time to stop for them."

Natalie nodded her head and followed Cynthia into the directors office. They sat at the conference table and left the door ajar so Cynthia could keep an ear out for visitors and phone calls.

"This is Natalie Kane with Cynthia, subject title A100." Natalie continued the opening for the recording noting the date and time of the interview as well as the special nature of the interviewee and the potential for stop and go. "Would you mind giving me some background to your position at NCIS? Like what a typical day would entail for you, hours worked, stresses?" Natalie wanted to start her interviews by easing people into their positions before getting personal. It also gave her a frame of reference for their work tasks.

"I'm the assistant to the director and I have been working in this capacity for 7 years. Director Morrow is actually my second director and I was grateful that he wanted to keep me on as many people hire their own assistants and rarely keep the previous ones." Natalie nodded and made a note of that as a stressor any time there was a change in leadership. "I arrange the directors schedule on a daily, weekly and monthly basis and there are often sudden changes that need to be addressed. I also deal primarily with his correspondence, phone calls, and anything minor that does not need his immediate attention. I usually arrive at work at 6am and will be here until 7pm most evenings unless other circumstances arise. Director Morrow will send me home earlier than that on slower days or if I've covered everything for his evening already."

"That can make for some long days. Tell me a little about your personal life. Married, Kids?" Natalie wanted to lead her into that direction as long hours away from your relationships outside of work could make it hard to have a social life. Research suggested that social activities and developing close relationships were an integral part of one's emotional and mental health.

"I'm single still, I just haven't found the right guy yet," Cynthia chuckled. "I've never been in a hurry to get married and my last relationship lasted 2 years. We broke up because his job was taking him overseas and we wouldn't be able to maintain a long distance relationship. We had begun to grow apart and it was a mutual understanding." Natalie made some notes, Cynthia appeared well adjusted towards the relationship and breakup but Natalie wanted to keep an eye there and make sure there wasn't something deeper going on.

"Friends?" Natalie prompted her.

"Oh yes, there's a few of the assistant's I've gotten to know with my time in DC. Three of us like to meet once a week to catch up and let off some steam. We make it a habit knowing that we all work long hours and it's hard to find friends who understand what we do."

Natalie made a couple more notes, "You're very fortunate to have found such friends." Nat looked up at the pretty brunette across the table. Her posture and body language showed she'd been relaxed through the whole conversation and Natalie decided it was time to see if this was a front or if Cynthia would get rattled. "What's the hardest part of your job? What brings you stress in your life?"

Cynthia glanced down at the table and uncrossed and re-crossed her legs. Small signs of agitation. "The hours can be hard at times, especially if my parents or brother is in town to visit my sister…" Cynthia paused and took a few deep breaths and when she looked up her eyes had gone glassy. Unshed tears sat ever so slightly in her eyes, "They don't always understand as they usually plan trips well in advance and there's been emergencies before where I can't really leave. They often have many questions, are disappointed and in the case of my parents, angry."

"I know this is hard," Natalie said reaching over and taking Cynthia's hand, "but it really helps to talk about it with someone, doesn't have to be me. I know NCIS has therapists and counsellors available, have you spoken to them about your guilt?"

Cynthia looked startled when Nat said 'guilt'. Natalie figured, like most children, disappointing their parents made them feel guilty but many couldn't put that word to the feeling. It would put too much onus on the parents. "No, they are others that need their time more than me." Cynthia pulled back on the table and was shaking her head as she said that.

Time for some tough truths Natalie thought, "No. Cynthia, you deserve their time as much as anyone else. There is no scale when it comes to personal problems and feelings. No one person is more or less deserving of help. And it's okay to have feelings and it is not your fault for how your family feels. Each person is responsible for their own emotions and actions. That doesn't mean they have the right to make you feel bad about not making it to see them."

"I guess, I just hate that Debbie, my sister, is a housewife and mother and she has all this time to visit and cook meals and host family. I resent her a little I think." Cynthia shook her head and put her head in her hands- "I can't believe I just said that."

Natalie rushed to her side and handed her a tissue from the box on the table. Crouching beside Cynthia's chair she touched her arm, "It's okay. It's okay to feel like this. Lots of siblings come to resent each other for little things at times. It doesn't make you a bad person and it doesn't reflect badly on your relationship either." Cynthia was looking down at her so she smiled slightly, "You told me you weren't ready to get married right? Can I ask why?"

"I always wanted to get a steady and secure job first. I love DC and politics and working at NCIS has been a dream. SecNav promised last year that they would look into changing policy that meant incoming directors wouldn't be able to just dismiss previous assistants. I'm waiting for that to go into effect so I know I will always have a position here."

"And if you were married, do you want kids? To be a housewife?" Natalie asked. She knew where she wanted to go with her line of questioning she just needed Cynthia to get there herself.

"Kids maybe, but I could never just sit at home. Long weekends get a bit much for me at times because I don't have enough to do. I like to be busy. And I have a maid because I can't keep a place clean longer than a couple weeks."

"How's your cooking?" Natalie asked with a quirk of her eyebrow and mouth.

Cynthia laughed, "Non-existant."

Natalie sat back in her chair and smiled at Cynthia, "So let me recap. You love your job and you've wanted job security before settling down like most reasonable adults. You need help with cleaning and cooking and being a housewife is just not in your skillset or one of your dreams…"At Cynthia's nod Natalie started to see the realization flash in Cynthia's eyes. "So being your sister, would be hell for you huh?"

"Oh yeah, I love her two year old twins but being with them 24/7 would not be fun or rewarding for me like it is her." Cynthia began to realize she didn't need to resent her sister anything. They wanted two different lives.

"So who thinks you should be more like her?" Natalie put down a couple notes as she asked the really hard question.

"Mom." The response was immediate and from the look on Cynthia's face, unexpected.

"It's okay Cynthia. Half the battle is learning who's voice in your head is making you think or feel that way. From there its up to you. You can try and have your voice heard by your mom, and others, or you can accept that no matter what, that's what a parent wants for you."

Cynthia chuckled and said, "Thank-you Natalie, I hadn't realized how much that bugs me at times."

"I'm glad to help. Anything else you want to talk about? Anything bugging you lately about your job or working here?" Natalie noticed they'd been talking for about an hour and miraculously they hadn't been interrupted yet.

"Not today, I mean there are days where I hear about reports, or read them myself, and the information can be a little upsetting but most days I don't actually have to read anything. I guess sometimes dealing with other agencies can get aggravating. They all want their own way and they want everything, NOW." She was chuckling so Natalie figured Cynthia had her own ways of dealing with those days. "Can we keep talking though? I just don't often feel comfortable with others to talk like this. I've kinda surprised myself a little."

"We most certainly can. Just know I'm not exactly a licensed therapist and if I feel at any point that you should see one I will make that recommendation." Natalie stopped the recording and smiled at Cynthia.

"I appreciate that. How often should we meet?" Cynthia asked this while running back to her office to answer the suddenly ringing phone.

Perfect timing, Natalie thought. Cynthia quickly took down a message for the director and by then Nat had packed up her things and met her in the outer office. She took out her date book though. "Well you aren't high risk or anything but I don't want you to feel like you can't talk to me if something comes up," Natalie reached into the outer pocket of her lockable briefcase bag and handed Cynthia a business card. They were simple. Just stated Natalie's name, her degrees and her cell phone number. "So I would maybe say once every two weeks but call me if you need me. If I can't answer, like when I'm in an interview or something, I always set my phone to give a little message that lets you know when I'll be free and do leave a message so I can call back."

Cynthia took the card gratefully. "Thank you Natalie. I do appreciate this. When I set an appointment to have an interview I didn't expect you to get much out of me for your study, I hope differently now or else I'd feel bad, but talking with you makes me feel better." She looked slightly ashamed.

"It's perfectly fine. And I never know what will or won't work well for research. Something less exciting like record keeping and secretarial work may produce interesting emotional aspects that you wouldn't necessarily expect. Everyone knows and fully expects a psychological and emotional toll on investigators but there is always much more to the whole picture than one piece."

Cynthia was smiling when Natalie left to go meet up with Ducky. Natalie personally didn't care if anything came from her interviews with Cynthia for her paper. Because it was rewarding enough knowing it was helping Cynthia and that mattered more to Natalie than any paper or doctorate degree. Helping others was the goal. Always.

She pressed the button on the elevator to go down and watched as it was rising up to her floor. She was busy putting her date book and pencil back in her bag so when she heard it ding she immediately stepped forward and ran into something firm but soft. Startled she let out a slight umph and felt hands grip her arms just above her elbows to steady her. She looked up and felt bad. She ran into someone. Special Agent Gibbs stepped out of the elevator and ushered her in. She was still staring at him when he reached in and asked "What floor?"

Nat recovered, "Oh…um… autopsy." She mumbled he pressed the correct button and smiled at her as the doors closed.

"You're lucky he wasn't holding a coffee." The deep male voice startled her. Why am I so frazzled, Nat wondered. DiNozzo was in the elevator with her. "He hates having his coffee messed with." DiNozzo smiled down and her and was carrying a large plastic bucket filled with what looked like evidence. Which made sense when he stepped around her and out on Abby's floor. "Hope you're not this quiet this afternoon," he called to her as the doors closed after him. She started to respond but realized it was too late.

"Damnit," she muttered to herself before arriving one floor lower and exiting the elevator. The doors to autopsy were already open and Natalie popped her head in, "Ducky?" she asked.

"Down here my dear, I'm just finishing up," came the Scottish brogue of Natalie's favorite medical examiner. He's the only ME you know, of course he's your favorite she thought to herself. Doesn't make it any less true came the chipper retort in her head.

Natalie walked down to the last table where Ducky was stitching up his Y-incision on an older man. He had grey hair, though not much of it, and it looked like maybe a natural death since Natalie didn't see any visible wounds or bruising. "Morning Ducky, so glad you were willing to change up your schedule for me."

"Not a problem my dear, I pushed an autopsy to this afternoon, which works better since Gerald had a dentist appointment this morning. This way I will have this assistance this afternoon." He tied off the last stitch and put down his utensils. "Commander Newell, this is Miss Natalie Kane, she's studying to be a psychologist and is researching for what I'm sure is going to be a remarkable expose into the minds of NCIS employees." Natalie smiled, "This is Commander Newell, he died of a stroke I'm afraid. Passed away peacefully in his bed next to his wife. Bit of scare for her I'm sure, but of all the ways an armed forces person could pass I suppose this would be preferable." Ducky finished putting away tools and placing some in a nearby sink to be disinfected first. "Would you mind putting on a pair of gloves and helping me put the Commander to bed?"

"Do you always talk to them?" she asked while she grabbed a pair of gloves from a nearby shelf.

"Yes, I find what we do to be so invasive. I feel it humanizes them a little more and helps from feeling too detached. I think if you are too detached you could miss things," he told her as they got the Commander onto a gurney and over to the freezers. "Of course too much empathy means you miss things too. A fine balance is key" Ducky said raising his finger in the air to punctuate his point. Natalie smiled and they rolled the Commander into his 'bed'. "His wife will be making arrangements this afternoon. He had a long and decorated career. I hope he finds peace now." Ducky closed the door and led her over to the one sink.

They washed their hands together and as they were drying their hands Ducky asked, "I hope this wasn't too traumatic for you, I had hoped to get him finished up earlier but I had a call from another medical examiner asking my opinion on something and while the answer was simple that man could talk your ear off." Natalie chuckled.

"I dunno Ducky, isn't that the pot calling the kettle black?" she teased.

Ducky looked up startled at her and smiled, "I suppose an argument could be made, just as long as I'm not boring. He went on and on about the shape of a mole on the man's buttock only to realize his assistant hadn't properly cleaned the man, if you know what I mean." Ducky lead her over to his desk and pulled out his chair for her, "Have a seat my dear, I'll gladly take a stool today," and off he walked to bring one of the rolling stools over from across the room.

Natalie took a seat in the desk chair, "Doctor, you could never be boring, even that story seemed interesting. Not the so called mole itself but what it ended up being makes for an interesting story," she told him while she lowered the stool and sat with her.

"Too true, my dear."

Natalie got him to sign his papers and pulled out her recorder and notebook. "First Interview with Doctor Donald Mallard, subject ID F001." She continued her usual shpiel.

"Why F001?" Ducky asked as she finished up.

"Oh, I separated everyone into three categories. Administrative is A, Forensics is F and Special Agents are-"

"S?" interrupted Ducky with a chuckle.

Natalie chuckled as well, "Actually they are I for Investigators."

"How clever" complimented Ducky.

"Thanks, obviously the number just coincides with the order people have been admitted to the study. I have a list of everyone and those who are more inclined to continue the study are given priority numbers. I'd hate to constantly be referring to you as F367. Not that I even have that many forensics personnel involved." She chuckled.

"Of course." Ducky smiled at her and gestured for her to proceed.

Natalie glanced at her notes from early and noted that easing Cynthia into the questioning was good and she knew from Doctor Mallard's personality he would tangeant off which Nat was fine with. You never knew what you could learn by just letting people talk. It's why she was glad to have a few hours with the doctor. "So, Will you tell me a bit about your job, day to day, hours, and common stresses?" she asked in starting.

"Well my hours are often determined on if there is a current case. I could be called out in the middle of the night for a crime scene but there are also times when I come in at 7 or 8 am and only stay til around 6 or so. My mother lives with me and she has dementia so it's important I get home at a regular time every day for her health of course." Ducky continued, "We do autopsies on any naval or marine personnel who have died, even one's assumed as natural causes like the Commander. We even do the odd autopsy for other agencies if requested. I'm known to be quite thorough and highly respected in my field." He paused, "not that I'm bragging," he clarified.

"How many autopsies would you say you perform a week?" Natalie wondered.

Ducky took a moment to think, "A slow week maybe only 1 but I've had as much as 20 to do in a week."

"Goodness!" Natalie exclaimed. "Mind if I ask why?"

"Of course not," Ducky started, "you see one of the military's ordinance disposal teams were taking a load out to Quantico when they were rear-ended by a truck driver not paying attention. They truck had a hood ornament that happened to hit one of the ordinances causing an explosion which then caused the rest to explode killing the two marine's in the truck, the transport driver and 7 other civilians in the area. We were lucky that there weren't more cars on the road at the time. Oh it also killed 4 of the cows that unfortunate driver was carting. I found out later they were going to a slaughter house so they would have died shortly anyway." Ducky chuckled slightly, "The explosion meant we had only bits and pieces here and there and it took some time to even put the puzzle back together and it was during that process we noticed some of our bones were just far too large for people and noticed that one of the poor beasts exploded while the others were merely burnt to a crisp. The rest of the cargo sustained a few bruises and abrasions. Remarkable strong animals if you consider what happened to them.

"Oh my," was all Nat could think to say, "But that only accounts for half of your autopsies that week."

Ducky laughed, "Yes there was also a training accident in Norfolk earlier that week and several navy personnel drowned during a diving exercise. You see, Private First Class was jealous of a buddy that was promoted ahead of him. So he sabatoged his buddy's air tank, but in doing so unwittingly damaged the other tanks and no one noticed until it was too late. One of the rescue divers tragically died bringing the unit to the surface when the ocean surface let go in one dangerous section and he was swept deeper and away from the others. He fell into a suddenly opening in the ocean floor and it took a 70 ft dive to rescue his body then. It was a very dark and sad case."

"Do you often feel that way during cases?" she asked him. She made notes as she had listened to him. While the doctor had seen some very interesting cases and obviously had a remarkable memory for them, she could see the emotions play across his face in his re-telling.

"Yes, humanity never ceases to surprise me with their cruelty to others. I find I end up looking forward to issuing a natural cause of death for people." Ducky sighed, "Many days you wonder at what could make people treat each other in such ways or what brings people to feel that suicide or murder are their only options."

Natalie nodded and made a note of the intense interest Ducky clearly had for psychology, "Hence your interest in the mysteries of the mind?" she asked. He nodded. "How about your personal life doctor, you said you have a mother at home?" she asked steering the conversation a little more personal.

"I'm single I'm afraid, my mother bothered my about it for years and when her memory is good, still does." Ducky got a far off look in his eye as he continued, "It's hard as a medical professional to find someone, let alone if you are a medical examiner. I mean I don't meet many eligible bachelorettes at work," he teased, "but I've dated and hoped for the best but just haven't seemed to find someone who can accept what I do. To many people it's very dark and unseemly. I mean you can hardly talk about your day at work over dinner dates." Ducky paused before continuing, "but I suppose it hasn't dampened my spirit. While I may be too old for children now I truly believe that love knows no age." He smiled at her.

"Very true, all it takes is two people to put in the time, effort and affection to make a relationship" she replied. "Do you ever get lonely?"

"Oh of course. But I have friends and I date when I can. Mother makes it difficult to have a social life, but I'm all she has." Ducky bounced a little, "Oh! Except her Corgis!" he explained. "She dotes on them so, they are little beasts at times. Why Tyson is so names because he's a biter!" He looked at her as he said that as though he was telling a big secret and it made Natalie laugh.

"You seem remarkably well adjusted Ducky, if you don't mind me saying," she told him.

Ducky sighed, "I suppose. I have an old friend from medical school who dropped out to become a psychologist. We speak over the phone when things get rough, but I do find I can bottle things up at times. It's not easy for me to talk when things are more personal. If you ask anyone I normally wear my heart on my sleeve. Why just this week we found a mummified corpse in a pod. I was happy to see the ones responsible pay for what they did. They stole money from the dispersing office and the poor fellow ended up getting blamed. He had a young wife and newborn at home that were denied any benefits because of his dishonorable discharge. I am happy to state that wrong is being rectified now. But it doesn't change that he never even got to see his baby daughter."

Natalie wrote a note and was left with thoughts, How often were families denied the benefits they needed because of mistakes like this? Natalie's brow was furrowed in her thinking, I hope this doesn't happen too often. I mean I understand if someone has clearly been at fault. Oh god, what happens if you were honored with a medal and later you did something stupid, did they take that medal away? It didn't change what they did to deserve it in the first place really.

"Oh dear, I'm sorry if I've upset you," Ducky said while placing a hand on her knee.

Natalie looked up at the doctor, "Oh no, I was just thinking."

"Oh good. I was worried when you looked cross with your brow so furrowed" he told her.

Natalie laughed, "That's my deep in thought face, or so my mother coined it. I'm afraid I do it whenever I get lost on a train of thought. I was just thinking about families and those with awarded medals things like that."

"Oh I see. Yes sadly they will take away medals if you've done something dishonorable. It happens, but most deserve it. It takes extraordinary valor and bravery to receive medals of commadation. Of course, I know someone who refuses to accept them. He's an agent here, and refuses any medal award him for his work here. He doesn't like the attention and in his mind, there are others that deserve the respect and valor." Ducky's phone rang so he answered it, "Autopsy… yes…oh of course. It's for you my dear" he told her.

Natalie was startled as she paused her recorder and took the phone, "Hello?"

"This is Gibbs, my team is ordering lunch, wondered if you wanted something, Kate's picking up food and is hoping to eat and talk this afternoon if that's alright?"

"Oh sure, um, what are you ordering?"

"Chinese."

"Just a lo mein and egg roll with plum sauce. Oooo and wonton soup, love that stuff."

"Alright, see you in 30." And with that he hung up.

Natalie handed the reciever back to Ducky, "Apparently I get to have lunch with Kate during our interview, I still have 30 minutes before I have to be upstairs…" she trailed off.

"Oh, well I may have another story for you."

25 minutes later Natalie was in the elevator to go upstairs and meet with Gibb's team for lunch. Ducky was happily starting into his packed lunch while he waited for Gerald to get back so they could start the autopsy together. Natalie liked her talk with Ducky. She felt it really did show the more grueling aspects of his job and was an interesting window into his psyche as well. She wasn't lying when she said he was remarkably well adjusted. She supposed at his age and doing his job for so long that he would have his own ways of coping. She was looking forward to discovering those. Maybe it would help future MEs.

She exited on the 2nd floor and went over to where Gibbs and his team hung out. Kate had apparently just gotten back and was handing out food. "Jesus, Tony!" she heard her say, "Can you try to eat less like a pig?" And Natalie finally got into a position to see Tony shoveling food into his mouth as fast as he could "Mnnmrrgmrmgmeat" was his only response around a mouth full of food. "GROSS" cried Kate. Tony must have chewed and swallowed, "Gotta eat quick," he clarified, "Gibbs wants me to go bring in Sanders for interrogation." Tony then shoveled more food in his mouth before grabbing his jacket. Natalie finally rounded the bull pen to their area when he finished this mouthful. "Don't worry Natalie, I'll be back by 2 for our interview" he told her with a wink before stealing an chicken ball from Kate and heading to the elevators.

"Gibbs wouldn't let him finish lunch first?" Natalie asked Kate since the boss man himself wasn't there.

"Gibbs prefers you get things done before you eat" Kate chuckled. Upon seeing that Nat was looking for Gibbs Kate explained, "Gibbs is getting an update on forensics from Abby, he'll be back in a few minutes, but here's your food." Kate handed a small paper bag to Natalie and Natalie pulled out her wallet to pay. "Oh no, it's on me" Kate informed her and Natalie thanked her. They sat at Kate's desk while they ate and chatted about where Kate got the food. It was good Chinese and that was always worth knowing about.

"So I have a couple papers for you to sign first and I hope you are okay with my recording this? Did you want a private room?" Natalie was worried it might feel exposed as anyone walking by would hear them.

"Around here there's rarely privacy and since DiNozzo will be gone for our time slot, I can talk freely with no worries. That man is the most nosiest person you'll ever meet. Nothing is sacred to him" Kate told her.

"Yep, but he makes a great investigator for it," Gibbs piped up startling Natalie.

"I like to say you get used to it," Kate said in an aside to Natalie upon seeing her jump, "But you don't."

Gibbs was chuckling as he sat at his desk, "Report" was all he said and Kate had put down her good and walked over to Gibb's desk handing him a file.

"Everything DOD had on the contents of the container. The manifest they had and the one found at port were missing two key items: A case of painkillers and the new credit cards for the dispersing office on the Kennedy" Kate reported quickly and consicely.

"Good, Food?" he asked her finally looking up. She grabbed a large paper bag and handed it over.

"DiNozzo's chow mein is still in there if you're extra hungry today" Kate said walking back to her desk smirking.

Gibbs grabbed a container and started to eat sipping at the coffee he had brought with him. "You ladies do your thing, I've got stuff to read," he told them before turning to his computer while he ate.

Kate told her they might as well start so Nat turned on her recorder and prepared for her third interview of the day.


	8. Interlude

Hey guys, I hope to upload a chapter or two this weekend. I'm sorry for the delay but life has gotten busy and I have 2 other projects on the go. I'm dealing with some writers block so I've started another story that I hope to start publishing soon and it's helping but it just means there may be a bit of a wait between chapters now.

I'm so glad that everyone has been enjoying it so far. And thank you for all your patience.


	9. Chapter 8

**Hey Guys, here's chapter 8 and I will have 9 up momentarily. Just FYI, I'm on chapter 11 so you are almost caught up to where I'm writing so the time between chapters could increase. Thanks for all the patience and I hope you enjoy.**

Chapter 8

By the time Natalie got to Abby that evening she was actually starting to get tired. Kate had been a breeze and she got all kinds of stories about Kate's time in the Secret Service and how things have changed for her with NCIS. It was clear to Natalie that Kate was a bit of a special case since she had access to mental health care through her sister where others didn't get that same opportunity. Nat wondered if things would be different for Kate if she didn't have her sister, would she be like others and actively avoid talking to councellors?

While Kate was easy, DiNozzo was energy. Even his stories had energy. He deflected with humor more times than not. And most of that humor was movie based. DiNozzo knew a lot of movies and it helped in cases for him in the past. When you got deeper Natalie imagined she would get to meet the real Tony.

Nat heard heavy metal music playing quietly when she got off the elevator at 5pm. She walked through the doors to forensics and saw Abby by one of her machines, "Hey Abby," she said to her before standing by her, "What are you working on?"

"Oh Hey! How was your day?" she asked, "I'm just finishing up something to go into my mass spec and then I'm free." Abby put down the dropper and picked up the small vial before putting into her machine and pressing a button. She pulled off her gloves and turned to face Nat. "Now what?" she asked very nervously.

"Well if you feel comfortable here we can talk here. If you feel like its tainting your space," Natalie shrugged, "We can always go some place else. Oh I have something for you though." Natalie reached into her bag and pulled out a little package wrapped in black paper and a deep purple bow.

"For me?" Abby asked retorically. She opened the package to find the little voodoo doll that Natalie thought she would like. "Oh My God, it's so cute!" Abby gushed.

"I usually have things with me to help people relax or divert their anxiety when talking about tough subjects. I thought you could have your own little thing. Somehow rubiks cubes and beads on string didn't seem appropriate for you." Natalie then showed her how the doll had a bag on its back that carried a few pins that looked like arrows. The doll had black hair and a red dress with a skull on it. Abby gushed some more before leading them over to her back room.

"I love it! Thank you, we can talk here I think, if you don't mind keeping the music on? I'll keep it really low." Abby went over to turn the music down some more when Natalie nodded. Nat started to pull out her things and handed her paperwork to Abby to look over. Soon enough the usual pleasantries were over and their interview had started. After hearing some more about what Abby did at NCIS it was time to dig a little deeper.

"How's your personal life? Why don't you tell me a bit about you and your family." Natalie was sure that Abby danced to a beat only she could hear and she was interested in getting a glimpse of that person.

"Well I have a younger brother who I'm pretty close to. I grew up in Louisiana." Abby was busy stabbing at her new doll, "This this is awesome by the way."

When Abby didn't talk for a bit Natalie gently put her arm on Abby's, "Abby its okay to be nervous. Want to hear a bit about me? Will that help?"

"I dunno, this whole thing just feels hinky to me. I always hated having to sit with teachers and talk about why I chose to do my speech on death. It's not my fault it was interesting to me" whined Abby.

"No, actually it can be very normal, it just has a very negative stigma attached to it. Same with people who embrace the dark side of life. A lot of those people are some of the happiest you'll ever meet," Natalie told her. "Well, that's been my experience at least."

Abby nodded her head and looked glumly at her doll. They sat in silence for a bit while Natalie tried to think of a good way to get Abby talking.

"Why don't we play a game we used to do in college…" Natalie pushed aside her notebook and pen and moved the recorder over. She pulled out a deck of cards.

Abby smirked, "Poker?"

Natalie laughed, "No, its like poker and 20 questions had a baby." She dealt the cards evenly between them. "So this is how it works, we each draw 3 cards from the top of our stack and place them face up like this…" Nat laid out the 5 of clubs, king of diamonds and 2 of spades. Abby pulled a 10 of hearts, 5 of hearts, and 7 of spades. "So, whoever had the highest card gets to ask a question. The other two cards show what the question can be about. Hearts are love related, so relationships, friendships, family, even dreams. Diamonds are money related, so future hopes and dreams, 'if you had a million dollars' type things. Clubs are violence related, so questions like that 'fuck, marry kill' game umm….people who've wronged you, stuff like that. And Spades are kinda like death so the really dark twisted questions can come out."

Abby nodded her head, "It's like all the really good drinking games rolled into one, only no drinking."

Laughing Nat said, "Well you could add alcohol to it I'm sure, we just never played like that."

"It's a neat concept, how did you think of it?" Abby asked.

"A bunch of psych majors were studying one night and we realized it was too hard for us to evaluate each other for our assignments because we could just make up stories to fit the diagnoses and that's not how real like works. This was we could get to know each other better and challenged ourselves to be better diagnosticians."

"Cool, so you have the high card. And if I got this right you get to ask a violence and a death question?" Abby looked at her skeptically.

"Yep and when we played anyone else with a 'court' card could ask questions that round too. So a 10 or higher, aces as highest, get to ask questions." That meant Natalie would be answering questions about love and death. Yippy, she thought.

"Alright, this is kinda neat."

Natalie smiled at Abby's remark. Go easy, she thought to herself. "Who's one person in your whole life that you wish you could just punch?" she asked.

"Oh easy, I already did!" Abby exclaimed. "See back in high school my boyfriend Jet, isn't that a stupid name! Anyway, I found out he was cheating on me with a cheerleader of all people. So at a party one night he snuck away with her at one point and I found them. Kicked his ass all the way down Frankie Geroux's lane way. Only punched him once," she explained, "I literally kicked him in the butt down to the proverbial curb."

Nat laughed at the mental image of a young Abby doing just that, "Good on ya! No person deserves to be cheated on. Period." They both chuckled for a bit before Natalie asked her next question, "Were you always interested in goth?"

"Oh yeah. In Louisiana funerals are this big procession and music and it started there I think. I always loved black. And while it can be very freaky at times to a normal person to me I just find it interesting. Everything about it. You can meet really sad goths or sexually kinky goths or…"

"Happy-go-lucky Goths?" Natalie asked with a sly smile.

"Yes!" Abby said hugging Natalie. "It's so inclusive and I love that!" Abby shrugged, "I guess the darkness and creep-factor is kinda cool to me too." Abby looked suddenly scared, "That doesn't mean I'm fucked up does it?"

"Oh God No!" Natalie exclaimed. "You are very healthy. People who don't understand people and only see stereotypes and stigmas would probably think like that, but those are the same types of people who display racism, sexism and all the other isms" Natalie explained to her. "Never feel like I'm going to see someone other than a brilliant, smart, happy young woman. Because regardless of all the other things, that is who and what you are." Natalie smiled at her and Abby smiled back giving her a quick nod.

"So love… Have you ever been in love?" Abby asked. "I mean I know you're pretty young, and like genius level smart, just wondering if you got to experience a normal growing up love life?"

"I always hated the normal word. Typical is better. Each persons normal is different but what everyone views as one way to do it and how it 'should' be done is more like the word typical." Natalie looked down in shame, "Sorry if that seemed like a lecture. It's just.." she paused trying to think of the words, "to me, my life is normal. It's the life I've got, it's how I grew up and each and every day seemed normal. But to others, no my life was beyond normal and I didn't get to liking boys at the same time as everyone else. I'm very socially awkward with guys. As for in love?" Natalie took a bit to think about it. "No. I had a boyfriend, only one, and while I like him and he was like a best friend to me. I loved him, but not in love. I think that's why everything was okay between us when he moved to the west coast for medical school."

"I'm sorry. Did I make you sad?" Abby asked.

Natalie smiled, "No just deep in thought. Memories."

"I'm glad. You're really pretty when you smile." Abby paused to think for a bit and Natalie took much needed sip of water. She wasn't anticipating feeling this emotional talking with Abby. "Have you ever lost anyone? You can totally not answer and I know it's really persona-"

"It's okay Abbs," interrupted Nat, "If I want you to feel like you can by open with me I want to be open with you. I like you Abby. And more than this being about a study… to me its about making a friend."

"Awww, I will totally be your friend," Abby said while grabbing her into a hug.

"My mom" whispered Natalie in answer to Abby's questions. Abby's hug got tighter. They just sat like that for a while. When they pulled back Natalie told Abby about that night. She hadn't spoken of it since explaining the situation to her grandpa. And besides him, the only other people she told her story to where the NYPD and her grief counsellor. It felt good to talk to Abby about it. She was understanding and oddly positive.

"See you gotta remember, if that hadn't have happened you wouldn't be here and we can all be family for you. NCIS is like a big family." Abby explained and it made Natalie smile.

They re-dealt cards and only Abby got to ask questions. One on love and one on money. "If you had a million dollars and could do anything you wanted, what would you do?" asked Abby.

Natalie tilted and pursed her lips when she thought about it, "It's weird, but I'd buy myself a place in DC and I would love to keep working at NCIS. It's so different here and I think I could really change the way mental health is treated here. I hate that you get sort of ordered into therapy if you've dealt with something heavy and you have to go to their office and what not. It's not an easy thing for alphas to do and then expect them to open up in a finite amount of time is ridiculous. There has to be a better way and I hope I can find it."

"I'll help you." Abby was adamate that they would be able to put their heads together and that made Natalie feel good. "Okay, who all have you met here, male wise?" Abby asked misheiviously.

"Umm my grandpa, Ducky, and Gerald. Um… a couple security people I don't remember names of." She thought of which agents she actually knew as well, "Agents Pacci, Gibbs and DiNozzo."

Abby bounced up from her seat, "Perfect" she said while clapping her hands. She went and grabbed a piece of computer paper and a marker. "Okay, so on a scale of 1-10 we are going to rate them. We just need some categories…" Abby was writing the name of each guy, minus her grandpa, down the short side of the page. Two lines were drawn separating the top from the side and across the top Abby wrote, "Looks, Brains, Friendliness, Sex Appeal, aaaaand, Dateable." Natalie started laughing.

"What are you doing Abby this is silly" she told her.

"No Way! You didn't get to have a typical teenage years and this is totally something teenage girls do. They rate their classmates, only we don't have classmates." Abby assured her this would be fun. "Okay, Ducky…"

Natalie thought about it, "Honestly?"

"Of Course! And it stays between us, I'll tell you what I think too!" Abby was clearly very excited so Natalie decided it was kinda fun. Like a secret and it made her feel closer to Abby.

"I think Ducky was probably quite the head turner when he was younger as he's still good looking. Lets give him a 7?" she told Abby. Abby dutifully wrote it down, grinned at Natalie making her feel self concious at first until she saw what Abby wrote beside it, an 8. It made Nat giggle.

"What?" asked Abby, "Duck man has his own good lookingness, like old movie star."

"What's next?" asked Natalie suppressing her grin.

"Brains, which Ducky is super smart so I gotta give him a 10" Abby told her.

She agreed, "10 for sure." Natalie stopped a moment, "And a 10 for friendliness."

"Totally!" Abby marked it down. "Sex appeal?"

Natalie thought about it, "If I were older maybe. I'm thinking a 6."

"9 for me," Abby said waggling her eyebrows, "I dunno what it is but I would totally bang Ducky if I didn't think it would ruin our relationship."

Natalie silently chuckled, "What's the oldest you've gone?"

"My Biology professor, he was in his 60's."

"Abby!" Natalie couldn't stop laughing. She loved Abby, she was so liberated and free and really didn't let things like social norms stand in her way. "I'm actually really proud of you for that," Nat told her.

By the time they were done their chart looked like this:

LBFSAD? Y/N

DuckyN-7 A-810!!!10N-6 A-9Maybe

GeraldN-6 A-910!N-9 A-10N-4 A-7Yes

PacciN-4 A-5N-7 A-7N-7 A-8N-4 A-2No

TonyN-8 A-8N-6 A-710N-6 A-5Maybe

GibbsN-8 A-7N-9 A-8N-6 A-10N-10 A-1Yes/No

"Gibbs is like an uncle to me," said Abby, "But he's really nice so I'm surprised you only rated him a 6."

"I haven't talked with him much." Natalie was embarrassed, now Abby knew that Nat found Gibbs, compelling. She couldn't explained it when asked, "I dunno Abbs, he makes me more nervous that I've ever felt. I actually forget to speak."

Abby giggled, "You totally have a crush, and Gibbs is totally crush worthy."

Natalie was still blushing almost as bright and Abby's voodoo doll's dress. "Abby please don't make a big deal out of this?" begged Natalie.

"Oh sweetie, I'd never." Abby pulled her into a hug. They had shut off the recorder when they started their mini game and it was a good thing because in walked Gibbs. Abby reached for the paper and it fell right in front of Gibbs. He handed it to her with barely a glance and Abby quickly shoved it under some files to discard later. "Hey Gibbs what's up?"

"Just running some paperwork down for you" he said nodding at the file on the table in the other room, "its an old case." They walked over to it, "Mostly ledgers, just need to know if there's a pattern to be found and there's computer bits in there too."

"Harddrives Gibbs." Abby admonished him. "And they don't bite you know" she teased him further. "Want me to start on it tonight? I can get a program running on the ledgers?"

"Yeah but don't stay all night." He then looked to Nat, "Sorry to cut your interview short."

"Oh Gibbs we were almost done anyway," Abby said for Natalie.

Natalie thanked Abby, "I'm going to grab my things and call a cab."

"You need a ride?" Gibbs asked her. Her stomach started doing flip flops again. It was everything she could do not to blush horribly but still her cheeks went pink.

"I don't drive." Dear Lord Girl! Her inner monologue started in on her, is that all you can say, 'I don't drive', and in such a monotone. "Um, what I mean is…" she started explaining, "I never learned and didn't expect to be commuting this much."

"Alright," Gibbs said taking her bag for her, "I'll give you a ride." And with that he placed his hand on her lower back and lead her out of Abby's lab.


	10. Chapter 9

**Here's Chapter 9... it's kinda short that's why it and 8 are being posted at the same time. Enjoy. And please leave comments they help boost my ego and mood ;)**

Chapter 9

Gibbs POV

Gibbs told Cynthia he was taking Natalie home as the director was busy. He walked her to the car and she gave him her address on the way. That was 15 minutes ago. They had been sitting in silence through rush hour traffic. And strangely Gibbs wasn't feeling as agitated over being stuck in traffic as he usually would.

"I haven't set up a time yet" Gibbs said out of the blue.

"Sorry?" Natalie asked him, looking bewildered that he was even talking to her.

"Your interviews. Cynthia keeps bugging me but I'm not good with talking" he told her. He wanted to talk to her. To spend time with her. But the whole subject matter is what made him feel uncomfortable.

Natalie nodded her head and then looked back out the window. Gibbs thought she was going to be silent for a while again and was thinking of what to say when she said, "Doesn't have to be at work. I offered to Abby to do it anywhere she felt comfortable. We can do it anywhere." She was blushing again. She looked beautiful when she blushed and Gibbs thought he knew why.

"Doing it anywhere huh?" he teased. He was pleased to see her blush deepen and his thought confirmed.

"I didn't mean-" she started, "-what I mean is- not that you're not- its just I meant- well…." She was so flustered and Gibbs took pity on her.

"I know what you meant Miss Kane," he said as they inched forward about a foot before stopping again. "So you can't drive?" he asked changing the subject.

"No, living in NYC when turned 16 meant I didn't need to learn. I have been thinking about getting my learners permit I just don't want to ask my grandpa to teach me because his driving scares me." Gibbs was reminded of the one and only time he drove with Morrow and understood what she meant. At first you wouldn't notice but he was actually a really distracted driver.

"I could teach you" popped out of his mouth before he knew what he was saying.

"Really?" she asked. She looked happy that someone would offer and Gibbs couldn't bring himself to taking it back.

"Sure, why not."

She smiled in thanks. And they sat in silence for another 15 minutes and another 45 feet.

"Where do you feel most at peace Agent Gibbs?" she asked him looking over at him. They hadn't moved the car in almost 5 minutes so he looked back at her. She looked genuinely interested. He glanced down and noticed the bruise he thought he saw earlier on her calf. Looked pretty nasty and he frowned with worry.

"My basement," he said before shaking his head and rubbing his hand over his face.

"Do you have a hobby there?" she asked looking out the window as yet another car honked.

"Wood" he said. I should have stopped for a coffee first he thought to himself.

Natalie nodded her head. "I like the smell of wood" she told him. "My mom used to paint folk art, it's the things made of wood and painted like something out of country living. Only hers would never be put in a country living magazine."

Gibbs raised his eyebrow at her "Oh? Why's that?" they were inching their way up to their exit and Gibbs was starting to regret that they would be back at a normal pace soon meaning his ride would be over soon.

"Mom had a dirty sense of humor. Her stuff had bad language, sexual themes and violence. She used to say they should be rated 'R' for Risque" she laughed.

Gibbs turned off the highway and started making his way downtown where traffic was faster but still congested. "I'm scared to ask" he told her, "I just make boats."

"Sail?" she asked him and he nodded. "I've always loved going to the harbor and watching the boats coming in and out while I studied. It was my quiet place." She paused before adding, "Well not that it was actually quiet, just made me feel at peace."

Gibbs looked over at her when they stopped for a light. Her hair looked on fire where the sun touched it and Gibbs marveled at how soft it looked. Everything about her looked soft yet he knew from talking with Ducky that she was very strong. But he couldn't help wondering about the bruises he'd seen.

Soon enough they pulled up to her apartment building and it was time for her to get out. "Thanks for the ride, and offering to teach me" she said gathering her things.

"Wait," he said when she went to grab the door latch, "I'll give you my card and we can figure something out." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a card for her. He added his home number for her and started to hand it over, "but I have to ask," he said to her, "what's with the bruises, if someone is hurting you… you can tell us."

She smiled and grabbed his card from him, "I'm learning Krav Maga Gibbs, I tend to look worse." She got out of the car and leaned back in "But thank you for the concern, Night." And with that she was walking away to her doors. Gibbs shook his head at this conundrum that was Natalie Kane and drove back to NCIS to finish paperwork and to make sure Abby went home tonight.

He got to his desk to see Tony puzzling over a piece of paper, "Shouldn't you be home DiNozzo" he barked at him.

"I'm on my way boss, just picked up some files from Abby and can't figure this thing out. Any ideas?" he asked as he handed it over.

Gibbs could read it perfectly but loved to mess with them so he held it far away to read, "Looks like a bunch of names."

"Well yeah I got that, what's the other stuff, what's the numbers?" Tony continued and was peering over Gibbs' shoulder, "like there, why am I a maybe, and you're a yes/no."

"Why don't you ask Abby" he told him while handing the page back. Tony told him he could keep it, it's a copy, Tony has another. "DiNozzo, go home." Gibbs was getting irritated at him. After he left Gibbs took a better look at the paper.

Looks like a code of some sort. Question is why were only some of NCIS personnel on it. Gibbs put it out of his head while he started looking over his teams final paperwork from their latest case.

"Gibbs. Gibbs. Gibbs" Abby came running up to him, "Where's DiNozzo?"

"Home."

"Damn, he took files from my desk and there was something there he wa-" Abby stopped seeing the paper in question on Gibbs' desk, "Gibbs why do you have that?" Abby asked him accusingly while pointing at the paper.

"DiNozzo. You should know he's made a copy for himself" Gibbs told her barely giving the paper a glance.

"Oh no, she's gonna kill me!" Abby wailed, "And we were just getting to be friends. I have to fix this. Gibbs you have to help me!"

Finally he looked up at the frantic lab tech, "Help with what Abby? I don't even know what's going on." He gave her his patented Gibbs Look. But she didn't budge.

"I can't tell you Gibbs, if you know, then it's the same as Tony knowing and no one can know but its like a puzzle and Tony won't give it up now that he's seen it." Abby was pacing back in forth in front of Gibbs's desk so he got up and took her in his arms.

"It's going to be okay Abby, just talk to me."

She sighed, "Natalie and I were talking today and we sorta played a game to make me feel more comfortable around her and that paper has very revealing things on it that no one besides her and I should know." She paused grabbing the page and thrusting a finger at his chest, "Not even you Gibbs."

"DiNozzo will figure it out." Gibbs was sure he figured it out. The girls had rated the only people they both knew, the question was, why no females and why not the director? Unless its an attraction thing. They wouldn't rate his attractiveness.

"You have to stop him somehow!" Abby pleaded.

"He's gonna know you rated him sooner or later and he'll figure out it was Natalie that was with you Abby." Gibbs figured it was better to just let the cat out of the bag.

"You know?!" Abby's eyes bugged out.

Gibbs brought her in for another hug, "Yeah Abbs, I am a trained investigator." She chuckled into his chest. "Tony's a little slower though."

"Gibbs please don't tell Nat you know, she'd kill me. That stuff is like super personal." Abby shoved the paper into her pocket but Gibbs could only see his line in his head. L had N-8, A-7; B had N-9, A-8; F was N-6, A-10; SA was N-10, A-1 with D? yes/no which meant N was the yes and A the no. N was obviously Natalie and A was Abby. Numbers from 1-10 a basic scale. The only things Gibbs wasn't sure on was the L, B, F, SA and D.

"Abby, it's going to be okay. I won't jeopardize your new friendship. Besides I think she needs a good friend and she could totally kick you butt." Gibbs was leading her to the elevators now.

"What you don't think I could take her Gibbs? I'm hurt" said Abby as they walked into the elevator.

"She's learning Krav Maga, Abbs, Israeli Mossad learn that" he told her as they travelled down to her lab.

Abby looked shocked, "Wow!"

"How's the tests going?" Gibbs asked.

"Already running the algorithym" she told him. "And I'm downloading whatever I can get off the hard drives, so I can work on them in the morning." She walked over to change out her lab coat with her black leather one.

"It's a Saturday Abby, you don't have to work."

"I know." She smiled at him. "So Tony?" Abby asked worriedly before she left.

"I'll take care of it Abby."


	11. Apologies

Hey guys, just a quickie to say I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a long time. I'm at work today and getting a bit more writing done so I should have a few chapters ready to upload this weekend.

I have appreciated all the wonderful comments and encouragement. I've needed the boost as I've always wanted to be a writer but am a perfectionist as well, so I never think I'm that good.


	12. Chapter 10

**As promised...**

Chapter 10

 _Gibbs POV_

It was nearly 5 am when he got a phone call, "Heya boss, I think I may need your help on something."

"Well which is it Stan, do you or don't you."

"I do."

 _Natalie POV_

In her jeans and t-shirt she walked into NCIS and was surprised to see everyone at work. She was coming to take her grandfather to lunch since he was working on something at the office. She heard Gibbs say wheels up in 30. Apparently they had a case. She wished them luck and kept walking up the stairs to see Tom.

Cynthia wasn't in her office like usual but being a Saturday it didn't surprise Nat any. Her grandfather's door was open so she knocked and poked her head in.

"Hey" he greeted her, "just give me a moment to finish this e-mail and I will actually be done for the day."

"No rush," she told him before sitting down.

"So where are we going for lunch?" he asked her as he shut down his computer.

She stood up to lead the way, "I am taking you for sushi."

"Oh God, you really meant that the other day" he said as they walked out.

"You betcha." They walked past the empty desks that once had people at them and they bumped into Ducky waiting at the elevators.

"Oh Director, Miss Kane, nice to see you. Just popped in to make sure Gibbs would take a gift to Agent Burley for me." He said to them as they all entered the elevator.

"A gift?" Tom asked him.

"Yes, a cricket ball." Ducky looked at Natalie and explained, "Stan, Agent Burley, excelled at many sports but never could get a handle of cricket, I thought he'd get a kick out of it."

Tom chuckled, "From what I know of him he definitely will Doctor."

"Ducky would you like to join us for lunch? My treat?" Natalie asked.

"It would be nice to join you my dear but I'm afraid I have to get back home to my mother."

Natalie nodded in understanding and wished him a lovely weekend.

It didn't take long to get downtown but it did take a bit to find a parking spot. Soon enough Natalie was leading her grandfather into Qi the sushi place she came across the other day. They took a seat in one of the booths and soon a waitress came over with menus and asked what they wanted to drink.

"Two green teas and two waters please," Natalie ordered for them both. "You can't have sushi without green tea" she told her grandpa.

"None of this really looks appealing Nat," he said looking dubiously at the menu. She pulled it away from him.

"I'll order, you eat."

She ordered a variety of rolls for them. Some she knew were just for her but others she thought her grandpa might like. He looked very skeptical at the first piece she placed in front of him so she explained, "It's called a California Roll. All cooked meat, nothing you're allergic to." He quirked an eyebrow at her so she continued, "Like this" she said showing him how to pick it up with the chop sticks, "And feel free to dip it into some soya sauce." She ate hers in one bite and watched Tom do the same. Watching the look on his face was comical but eventually he swallowed.

"Okay, not at all like I thought it would be, its actually good." He grabbed another of the same and ate that one too. Slightly more game he asked, "What's next?"

She smiled and pointed out the next, "Dynamite Roll, has a bit of a bite to it."

"Not going to tell me what's in them are you?" he asked before taking the new piece into his mouth.

She grinned, "Nope. Only if you tell me you really like something or really dislike something. If you don't like it, I need to know what so we can avoid any similar types."

This one he seemed to like even more than the California so she told him what was in it. He was surprised but game for more. After 20 minutes they had a variety of types and it seemed her grandpa wasn't a fan of BBQ eel but seemed to like the salmon and butter fish, even though both were raw she told him. He was surprised because they didn't taste like he imagined they would. The owners found out what was happening and started to bring over other types in smaller batches for them to try. Some were things even Nat wouldn't eat but Tom willingly tried each. He only spat food out twice. One was the raw tuna and the other was one even Nat didn't like, octopus. She found it too rubbery. But she liked calamari, go figure.

"Were you always interested in different foods?" asked Tom.

They were being handed their dessert, mango ice cream. "Yea, mom always said living in New York meant we had a whole world of food we could try. So we often tried different foods. There were a lot of nights we didn't like what we tried, but mom reminded me that we wouldn't know if we didn't try it."

"What all did you try?" he asked eating his ice cream.

She took a spoonful herself and marveled at the flavors melting on her tongue. "mmm, well Sushi made the list, but all the usuals too. We did Chinese, Italian, French, Mexican. But we also tried curry, which mom loved and I couldn't stomach. Falafel, I like but mom could care less about. Various Japanese dishes, Mom loved miso soup. We tried some traditional German and Polish dishes and one of the stage hands at the theatre mom worked at was Swedish and his wife always made Christmas goodies for us. I have to say that some of those were to die for."

Tom had finished his ice cream and was sad to see their lunch coming to an end. "You certainly were brave, it took me years to try new foods."

She smiled grabbing the check, "Yeah, I think I was only so brave because of mom. She's the one that really wanted to try everything and she was always so encouraging. If I didn't like it, shed say, you can have Kraft Dinner for supper. It was my favorite."

They walked up to the cash to pay and thanked the workers for a wonderful meal and walked out, "Would you like to come to my lesson this afternoon?" she asked him. She was worried he wouldn't want to come but she was becoming proud of what she could do.

"Thought you did night classes?" he asked her.

"Usually, but Eph has his wedding anniversary tonight."

"Well I would love to come watch." So they walked back to her place and she let him into her apartment while she changed. "You weren't joking about the size" he told her as she walked into her bedroom.

"Nope, but I like it" she said before sliding the door closed. She quickly changed and they made their way downstairs. She pointed out some of the businesses before unlocking the doors to the gym and going inside. "Hey Eph," she called to her coach. He was signing someone up and waved at her.

"Just go on in Nat, I'll be there in a minute" he told her. So Natalie showed her grandfather the room where she'd been learning to not get beat up as often.

"Quite the place," he said looking around.

"Thanks for coming this afternoon, I got us reservations at Gino's and after we are going to walk the promenade" gushed Ephraim. He'd been planning his anniversary all week. "And is this your grandfather then?" he asked her.

Tom surprised her by going up and introducing himself first, "Tom Morrow, director of NCIS, and yes I'm Natalie's grandfather, is it alright that I watch?"

"Of course," Eph told him. He showed him where he could sit while Natalie started warming up, "Nat mentioned she was going to see if you'd like to watch. She's learning remarkably fast."

"I dunno Eph, you still kick my butt" she said taking a few hits of the bag. "Toss me my wraps grandpa?" she called over and he dutifully tossed the pink splotched white wraps with a questioning glance, "Some is mine, Some's Eph's" she told him while she wrapped her hands.

"Yeah a couple days ago she got a good hit in and busted up my lip," Eph told him showing the underside of his lip where it was still healing, "Like I said sir, she's doing very well."

"Ready." Natalie called and she and Eph started to fight. With today being an afternoon it was only going to be a half hour so they were just going to spar with the knowledge she had already. Natalie was pumped.

Tom POV

Watching his granddaughter grapple with a man he knew was capable of killing her was somewhat difficult. He hated to see her take hits but she could give as well as she got and was moving quite well. Tom could see what Ephraim meant by her doing so well. It had really only been a few weeks but her capabilities were clear.

She was quick, light on her feet and took hits better than he had seen some marines. Her muscles were defining themselves and she was gathering a better balance. He noticed whenever her and Eph got into grappling and trying to pull each other down she was balancing very well and moving her legs well. She could twist and weave like a snake trying to get caught and she used her small stature to her advantage by hitting low. Tom found that even though he watched her take a couple of hard hits and knew she would have a couple new bruises, he was very proud. Just when he thought she might manage to take Ephraim down he spun so quickly Tom barely followed the movement and Natalie was flat on her back with a foot at her throat.

Rather than be deterred she huffed out, "You're gonna have to show me that one next week." Eph helped her up and checked a small cut on her eyebrow for her.

"Just a scratch, I'll grab a butterfly bandage for it to keep it closed, but watch when you shower it will probably bleed a little again" he told her before leaving the room.

"Well?" she asked Tom.

"I'm speechless." He really was. He didn't like seeing her get hurt but she was so remarkable to watch taking on Eph that he would forget that she was his flesh and blood for a moment. He got that way with Scott when he was in boxing. "You are doing very well, he always end with something like that?" he asked her. She nodded and Eph came back to patch her up.

"It was wonderful to meet you Sir and I hope it wasn't too hard to watch," Eph said to him while shaking his hand again.

"Oh I think I managed."

"Indeed, only saw you wince once. I promise that punch probably hurt me more than Nat, she spun and I caught her hip mostly." Eph showed him where he was already bruising on his left hand. "My wife will shake her head at me but she's seen me worse." He turned to face Natalie then, "I will see you next week, are you sure you just want the 3 lessons now? I don't mind making the extra time."

"Yeah, between school and NCIS I need to cut back a bit." She wiped her face and winced when she ran over her cut, "Besides, don't you need to start thinking about getting ready for a baby?"

"Yeah, 5 months to go. Sorry I didn't say anything sooner, but we wanted to be sure." Eph and Natalie hugged and everyone went their separate ways.

"Eph says I'm doing good so it is not like I'm going to be falling behind if I cut back. And really, I'd feel better if he had more nights at home with his wife. They've had a couple of miscarriages and had actually given up hope on kids so I hope this all goes well for them," she told him as they made their way back to her apartment.

"Well he seems a capable teacher for you." Then Tom said his goodbyes and went home.


	13. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"So I want you to be thinking about your final paper early on. It's easy to get caught up in all the information out there and these papers are only 8-10 pages. I know that seems like a lot but trust me it's not when you start writing. I'll be available Mondays and Wednesdays for office hours from 9-11am. Keep in mind I do see some of my biology students as well during those times. I'm always available on email as well. I think we are going to end early today and if anyone wants to talk about the class I'll be in my office in a matter of minutes." Natalie packed up her materials and headed two floors up to her office. She shared it with 2 other doctoral students. One was studying neurobiology and they other was doing microbiology. Since Natalie had two degrees on the go she opted to just share the one office and her psych students would have to see her in the science building. Her lectures were also in the science building.

She had a Monday Tuesday Wednesday schedule. Monday's and Wednesday mornings she had her psych lecture from 6:50-8:50. It gave her just enough time to get upstairs for her office hours. Tuesday mornings she did a lecture from 6:50-9:20. She took a break for meetings with her academic advisors. She met with Dr. Shultz at 9:30 and met with Dr. Carpenter at 10. It gave her enough time to grab a bite to eat before she went to lab at 12pm. Labs were open for 4 hours for students to do work and learn things and Natalie's anatomy class got to work with various dummies and skeletons. When they continued their study they would eventually get to work with cadavers in later years. Natalie scheduled her own research on Tuesdays after labs. She kept her biology stuff on Tuesday and a bit on weekends and kept her Psych stuff to Monday and Wednesday. She also scheduled what she could for interviews with NCIS personnel in between, but mostly Thursday and Friday.

She unlocked the door to her office and sat at her desk. It was a smallish room with three desks and some filing cabinets and book shelves to separate them and to give each other some privacy. Natalie's desk was in the corner past some filing cabinets. She had two chairs opposite her desk for students to sit at and an old desktop computer that she could use. She logged into her account and opened her professor email. It was mostly faculty information and functions but there were also some emails from NCIS personnel wanting to schedule their interviews through her rather than Cynthia since she was very busy this week. She flagged them as important and would look at her day book later. She preferred to keep herself occupied with class things while available for her students.

She'd been making copies of possible essay topics for her students when one walked in.

"Professor Kane?" asked the shy Asian boy in front of her.

"Come in, have a seat," she said pointing to her chairs, "I'm just about done making these copies." When the copier spat out the last page she gathered them up and walked over to sit behind her desk, "How can I help you…" she trailed off waiting for the student to give her his name. With 75 students in her class there was no way she knew them all by name yet.

"Justin, Justin Chow." He was fidgeting in the chair. Probably nervous, she thought to herself.

"Hi Justin, what brings you by?" she asked politely with a smile she hoped would make him feel more comfortable.

"I um…" he paused, "I was wondering if we could talk about essay topics?" He pulled the syllabus out of his backpack. "It says here it could be on stereotyping or social cognition, but I was wondering if I could kinda do it on both?"

"What did you have in mind?"

He sat up straighter, like he gained some confidence in himself, "I was hoping to look at racial stereotypes from an Asian perspective. My family is very old school and I grew up with stereotypes on other races as being inferior to our heritage. I thought that perspective with regards to racial sterotyping would be interesting as Asians aren't generally seen as racists in and of themselves but I know from the small town my parents came from racism is very much prevelant Ma'am."

Natalie smiled, "Sure, something like that could be very doable as you as looking at a stereotype from a specific social group who essentially trained the generations to think a certain way. I think you will have a bit of trouble finding some sources. I know there is a social psychologist from Japan who has done some studies on Asian racism I'd have to look him up again. I would be interested to see if any of his work has been translated. Can I ask why this topic?" she asked.

"My family is racist, and I hated it growing up. So did my dad, that's why he moved us here. But with my grandmother getting old she's come to live with us and she doesn't like mine or my little brothers friends. They are not Chinese so they aren't good enough. I was hoping I could help get her to understand that how she is thinking and treating others is negative and doesn't only affect others but herself too."

"How very ambitious of you Justin. I'll make a note and see if I can get some more information for you. Why don't you see me just before class on Wednesday and I'll get you what I have okay?" she told him.

"Thanks professor, and thanks for understanding. I'm not racist" he said almost sadly.

"Racism exists and wanting to study it doesn't make you racist, Justin. We can't move forward as a society and people without first understanding those negative forces. And unfortunately, we can't change the world, but sometimes we can change little things in people's lives and make a difference for them, and that's enough in my opinion. Because," she paused for dramatic effect, "we changed their world."

Justin left and Natalie got back to some of her paperwork. She was starting to feel like everything on her plate was a little much at times. Between school and her doctoral work, she barely had time to think. However, Nat was used to the heavy loads. All her life she looked to push herself because whatever was given to her came easily. She always needed more from her teachers because learning came easily to her. She remembered being a kid and wanting more and increasingly difficult math, reading at a grade 8 level by the time she was 7, and being given special projects until she could be assessed and placed in a proper grade. But even then, she was able to finish work faster than the other kids and could take on a heavier workload. She went to summer school to keep busy and when she was completing her undergrad most students would take 5 classes a semester, Natalie took 8.

For her, organizing her life and education was easy. The hardest part for her was the inability for her hands to keep up with her mind. She thought much faster than she could write or type and at times this could be frustrating. To her, having to slow her thoughts down was annoying. She wished technology would catch up, find a way for her thoughts to appear on screen as they were happening. It would make writing notes and essays and dissertations so much faster.

"Miss Natalie! I was hoping I'd catch you." Natalie looked up and saw her psychology academic advisor Dr. Carpenter in her door way, "Can I come in?" he asked before walking over to her desk. She gestured for him to take a seat.

"Dr. Carpenter, to what do I owe this visit?" she asked him in return.

He pulled out a folder from his briefcase, "I have some paperwork for you with regards to your thesis as well as some letters from collegues and a couple of journals who would be interested in your work when it is completed. I put everything together for you to go over at your leisure. Dr. Kurki, he's the dean of psychology at Princeton, he's offering an assistant of his to help you with your work if you're interested. He's rather disappointed you declined Princeton for us. Personally I'd rather have you here, he tends to like to "collect" students and I think it stunts their abilities to expand in the field if you know what I mean."

Nat was nodding along, used to Dr. Carpenter's personal opinions and tendency to ramble at times. She appreciated his support and his hands off attitude. It was something she had read about Dr. Kurki herself and was a slight deciding factor. A professor at Columbia had warned her this spring, "He tried to take credit for some of my research," she was told. That wasn't something Natalie wanted to put up with.

"I think I'll be okay, and if I need help I'd rather give my own students a chance rather than taking an assistant from someone else," she told Dr. Carpenter.

"That's why I like you so much, you put Georgetown first while you're here" he said with a wink. "If you do want to create a part time research assistant position let me know, we have programs in place to give students extra credits depending on their time and performance. It's a little extra work on your part as you have to do evaluations but it can help with the load."

"I think the biggest hurdle for me is transcribing my interviews. I can do a lot of the research no problem but transcribing takes time." Natalie pulled out some of the notes she had from interviews last week to show him how much she had so far.

"We can look into that. I've got a friend in the Business department, they have students in some programs that could use the practice. They usually contract out to businesses or politians in DC but I'll see if they have an opening." Dr. Carpenter made a note in his binder. "Any you need from me in the coming weeks?"

Natalie took a moment to think, "No I think I'm good."

They both stood then and shook hands. They said their goodbyes and Nat put the folder in her bag to take home with her later. She'd go over everything later.


	14. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

It had been a few weeks and Natalie felt good about the progress so far with her work and school. She had been interviewing quite a few agents and support staff and was getting a much better picture at the psychological lives of NCIS personnel. She was at home one evening when her cell went off. It was her grandfather so she picked up while saving the interview transcripts she received from a student working with her.

"Hey Grandpa," she said sitting back on her couch, "How are you?"

"Hey Sweetie, I've got some bad news." He sounded distraught and Natalie started to worry. "Chris Pachi was found murdered in an elevator tonight."

"Agent Pachi? I had been interviewing with him. Oh My God." Natalie was stunned. She assumed something could technically happen to the people she spoke with but never really thought it would happen. "I'm speechless."

Tom spoke, "I know it comes as a shock to all of us. And I hate to impose but would you mind making yourself available if anyone needs to talk. I know some of the people you've been working with would probably feel more comfortable talking to you than to our on staff psychologists and councellors."

"Yes, of course, did you want me to come in tonight?" Natalie was already thinking in her head who would be hurt most by Agent Pachi's passing. Doctor Mallard would be distraught having to autopsy a collegue and after everything that just happened with a terrorist in autopsy NCIS was already pretty shook up.

"If you don't mind, I have Agent Gibbs's team working on the case. I've been a little worried about them since the terrorist but I know Gibbs would want to investigate Chris's death himself," Tom said.

Natalie was already grabbing a few things and getting ready to call a cab, "Where they close?" she asked.

"As close as anybody who works in the same office would be I guess," he answered. "I'm gonna send a car for you, I don't want you taking a cab. But speaking of how is your drivers training going?"

"Well I have my learners which I am very happy to announce. Passed the test just last week and I'm not going great with my instructor. He makes me nervous." She decided she'd might as well sit back down if she was going to have to wait for a car. "I was going to ask Agent Gibbs if he'd be willing still since he offered weeks ago."

"Just be careful, Gibbs has an aggressive driving style," Tom chuckled.

"I will. How are you doing with this?" Natalie asked in her professional voice.

"I don't know," he sighed. "Chris was a good man, good agent. He's not the first agent I've lost but something like this…" he paused, "It's bad Nat."

She could only imagine, "You said it was a murder?" She hoped she could get him talking a bit; not only for himself but so she could help everyone else.

"Looks like. He had a gun shot to his neck, bled out from it knicking an artery. But worse, someone disembowled him." She heard her grandfather sigh again. It was obviously very difficult. "I don't need to tell you everything is classified for this."

"I know," she paused trying to think of something to help her grandpa, "I know it must be difficult to lose an agent this way, but you are a strong and capable leader. You have great people working for you who will do everything to find Chris's killer. Have you called his mother yet? I know he was a pretty solitary around the office but someone should find his planner too, he had been in a relationship for a while. He was very private about it."

"I hadn't realized he had a woman. Did he talk to you about her? Do you know her name? We can contact her and let her know, I've already informed his mother and she took it pretty hard."

Natalie felt awkward. She flashed back to her second interview with Agent Pachi.

 _"So Chris, how have you been this past week?" she asked the middle aged agent in front of her._ _He took a sip of his coffee, "Not bad. I've been combing through some cold cases after I got a tip from one a few years ago."_ _"Somehow I don't think a cold case is what has you so anxious today." Natalie noticed he was antsy, and seemed distracted. She felt the case was just a cover for what was going on. She wished she could get him to open up more outside of his relationship with his mother. He was pretty work driven. Had a few friends from college he still saw and a cousin that worked in DC but he never talked about his romantic life._ _"No my partner wants…" he stopped talking and looked down. He huffed, "I've never told anyone, not even my mother and my partner wants to meet her."_ _"Have you been dating long?" Natalie asked._ _Chris smiled, "Over 10 years." Chris got a far away look for a minute and Natalie let him be. "His name is George Wilks. He's a high school math teacher." Chris was obviously waiting for a reaction. But Natalie wasn't phased by things like homosexuality. Any sexuality really. To her, what mattered most in a relationship was that the people cared for each other, and that the relationship was healthy._ _"10 years is a long time, Congrats." She smiled and Chris was obviously not expecting her acceptance. "I'm guessing it's been hard on you, keeping George a secret?"_ _Chris looked ashamed before saying a soft, "yes."_ _"Can I tell you something?" she asked tilting her head to the side._ _"To be honest, I've wanted to tell people many times, but, in my job… I just didn't want to be judged."_ _Natalie reached over and supportively touched his arm, "You're from a generation that was unaccepting of different lifestyle other than monogamous heterosexuality. It's natural to feel awkward. But I want you to remember something. You have been with someone you obviously love, it was all over your face when you were talking about him, and that couldn't happen if you didn't accept yourself. Telling your mom and introducing George doesn't mean you have to open yourself up to everyone in your life." Natalie sat back, "You don't have to put a label to it. You just have to be happy. Have you been hiding this from your mom out of fear?" she asked._ _"I don't know." Chris sighed, "I wasn't always…like this. I just thought I hadn't found the right woman. I met George on a flight back from London. He was visiting his sister who was at school there and I was returning from a stint abroad. We talked. He was obviously gay. But he's always respected my want for privacy. He was charming and sweet and I had never felt like I did with him with any woman I had been with. It suddenly clicked. At first, I felt ashamed. But with George as a friend first, I slowly opened up. He has always made me feel safe. My mother has always wanted me to be happy, she's tried to set me up on dates over the past decade but stopped trying lately, I think she knows but I am truly afraid she'll reject me. I'm afraid of being treated differently." He shook his head, "Outside of George you are the only person I've ever spoken to about this. I mean George's family has met me but in my life, no one knows. I don't know why I felt comfortable talking with you.."_ _"I do." Natalie said, "You don't want to be viewed differently by the people you work with because it really doesn't matter who you date or what your lifestyle is, you are still the same Agent Chris Pachi. Your personal life doesn't define who you are or how you act but telling someone you see at work could start to effect you, you begin to wonder if they are keeping it quite, if they are treating you differently. Talking to an NCIS councellor will always make you wonder while talking to me feels safe. I'm outside your work sphere. Also I'm younger and from a generation more accepting to things but I want to tell you that no councellor working for NCIS would ever judge you or treat you differently. And I think talking to your mom would be good for you. I know you love her, and I'll be here to help support you any way I can." Natalie took a moment to pause and let that sink in, "So how's your relationship with George with your work?"_ _"He's great. He's the most understanding and patient person I've ever met. He's a great teacher too. His students love him and he teaches math with fun. He gets upset sometimes if we make plans and I have to cancel last minute but he understands how important my work is, that what we do here matters. The same way I understand his after school math programs are important to him." Chris smiled, "We sound so well adjusted but we've had ups and downs. Mostly in the beginning when I was first coming to terms with myself."_ _Natalie smiled, "I'm glad. You do sound like you have a healthy relationship and I think that's really important for you both. It doesn't matter what kind of job you have, every job has its own unique quirks and demands that can take a toll on relationships and it's how you approach everything that really matters. So I have one last question for you today if that's alright, I know you need to get back to work."_ _Chris nodded, "Sure, but please know this has helped me feel better."_ _"I'm glad, but through all of this, you've admitted to a partner, that he's male, and you love him and he loves you, but you seem afraid. Can you say the words or are you afraid to really admit it out loud?" Natalie felt it was important for Chris's own mental health with regards to his lifestyle that he say the words. Admit it out loud to himself._ _"I hadn't realized I don't until you said something. I wonder if George notices." Chris's brow was furrowed. "If I say it, it becomes real."_ _"It's already real Chris," she said gently._ _He nodded before he whispered, "I'm gay?" in a questioningly manner._ _"How did that feel?" Natalie asked._ _"Strange." Chris said, "But true." He finished his coffee in one gulp and stood up, turning to go. He reached the door and turned back around. In a much more strong voice he said, "I Chris Pachi am a gay man and I love George." He smirked._ _"Maybe when you get home you can tell him that?" she suggested._ _"I will. Thank-you."_

"Grandpa I don't know how to tell you this but, Chris was involved with a man. His name is George Wilks. He's a high school math teacher. They lived together."

"He's not on Chris's emergency contact list." Tom said. "I had no idea."

"He was very private about it, he just told his mom last week I think." Natalie felt awkward telling Chris's secret like this, "He never wanted anyone to see him differently and please don't tell anyone I just wanted to make sure George knew because Chris and he were really in love."

Tom spoke quietly through the phone, "I know this must be hard for you and I will handle it with delicacy and care myself."

"Thanks." Natalie said. Her phone beeped for a text and she quickly checked it. "Grandpa I have to go your car for me is here. Will I see you at NCIS?" she asked grabbing her things and locking up.

"I'm not sure, I'm going to head to Pachi's and see if Mr. Wilks is home so that I can break the news personally."

Natalie was waving to the agent behind the wheel when she said her goodbyes, "Then if I see you, I see you then. Good luck, and I'm here if you need to talk."

"Hey," said Agent DiNozzo. "You know?" he asked gently.

Natalie nodded her head, "Yeah, I'm still in shock. Agent Pachi was a good man. I hear you are on the case?"

DiNozzo pulled away from the curb, "Yeah, Gibbs had me out picking up some things when Morrow asked for me to swing by."

"I appreciate the ride" she told him.

"No licence yet?" he asked. He had stopped flirting with her but still flirted on occasion. Usually when he was stressed out and avoiding something.

"I have my learners. But my instructor makes me so nervous. He's kinda mean. I can't believe he teaches teenagers how to drive." She chuckled, "Maybe he thinks less of me because of my age."

DiNozzo shook his head, "Nope, he's just a jerk. At least that's what I'm going with because how could anyone be mean to you. You are so sweet. Until you go into Professional Mode. Then you can be intimidating and Abby says you can get scary when you're mad."

"Oh God Abby told you about that?!" she wailed. "I'm gonna kill her."

Laughing DiNozzo said, "Yep, so remind me to not grab your ass at a bar. While drunk."

"I was so upset. That guy was a total creep and I wasn't the first girl he was creeping on. I had a couple drinks-"

"A couple! Way Abby tells it you were well into your cups" Tony interupted.

Nat shook her head, "I mistakenly told her I'd never been drunk."

Tony was laughing so hard he nearly missed their turn. "Abby would be the one to get you drunk."

"Kate was there for a bit but got called away with a family thing. I watched this guy hitting on girls and just being way to aggressive and he was all hands when I was dancing with Abby that I told him to back off. He wouldn't so I laid into him."

"And you were all kicked out of the bar, followed by you knocking the guy out, who's friend took offence and when he went after Abby you took him down like a bad-ass."

"She told you about that part? I'm embarrassed. I've been taking Krav Maga and I guess the training worked?" she wimpered out. "How many people know?"

"A few." Tony pulled into a parking spot at NCIS HQ, "But it was mostly to praise how bad ass you were and that people should not mess with you."

They got out of the car and headed into the building. Natalie went to pin her badge to her shirt when she realized she never changed out of her casual clothes. She was wearing a sundress that went to her knees. It was dark blue with sunflowers on. DC had a heat wave and after school today she changed into something to cool off not even thinking she'd be going anywhere. It had little spagetti straps and she hadn't grabbed a sweater to cover up. She blushed when they entered the elevator.

"So do I comment on the dress or will you beat me up?" Tony asked.

She blushed even harder, "Depends what you say."

"Well there's two ways, One would be you look nice and its normal to be dressed casually when you get called in…" he paused waiting for my reaction.

"Thank-you that's nice of you Tony, I appreciate that you are trying to make me feel better."

"The second would be that dress suits you…" the bell for the elevator went and the doors opened, "and you look smokin' hot." He quickly exited and was speed walking to his desk calling out to Gibbs.

Natalie was stuck stunned in the elevator and almost missed getting out before the doors closed. She checked herself out in the reflection of the doors. Her breasts where rather prominent in the dress and it was fitted with a flirty frill at the bottom. Her hair was up in a messy bun and she still had lipstick on from earlier in the day but by now it was faded to a soft pink. She took a big breath and went to the bull pen. She said hellos to the team working on Pachi's murder and glanced at his desk. It still had much of his things around it. Not that he had much out. He was very neat and orderly.

After setting her things on a desk in the cubicle beside Gibbs's she stepped back over towards Gibbs and his team who were looking at the plasma. "Just wanted to say I'm in the building if anyone needs me tonight. My cell will be on me, and I'm gonna go check on Abby and Ducky while you guys work." They all nodded and she went downstairs to see Abby. She knew Abby would be busy but knew the goth would need a friend as well. She was a soft hearted individual and this would be hard for her.


	15. Chapter 13

**This means you are officially caught up. it could be a little until i post again. enjoy...**

Chapter 13

Music was playing when Natalie got off the elevator and she glimpsed Abby walking around in her lab, "Hey Abby," Natalie said softly while she leaned in the door way.

"Oh My God, Nat!" she rushed over to hug her. "I'm so glad you're here."

"Grandpa called, I thought you might need a friend." Natalie came into her lab with her and took a seat on a stool while Abby worked on the computer.

"Gibbs needs some work and I have to get it to him ASAP. Pachi was family. I'll work all night if I have to." Abby was clearly into a cafpow. Nat found her endearing when she rambled. "But I still, I can't even think about him. It's so sad."

"I know, Pachi was a good man. And he has the best team working on his death, he has the best medical examiner to find out what happened and he has the best damn forensic scientist on his case." Natalie looked at Abby as she stopped typing for a moment, "Remember that while finding everything out is important that Chris would not want you to forget to take care of yourself. Have you eaten dinner yet?"

Abby looked to the side, "Yes?" she questioned.

"That's a no," Natalie said, "I'll make sure to get you guys some food. I doubt Gibbs and his team have eaten either." She got up to leave, "And Abby, Chris would want you to be okay. It's sad, its horrific and it's completely unnecessary that he died, but he would want to be honoured."

Abby nodded her head and went back to work and Natalie went to check on Ducky.

The autopsy doors wooshed open and Natalie walked in. "Dr. Mallard, may I?" She always asked for permission when he was doing an autopsy. She respected his work space as well as the dead.

"Miss Kane, I figured you may show up, please come in. I can cover him if it's too much for you." He was standing in the way of Pachi so Natalie didn't have to see him if she didn't want to.

"It's alright. He's a friend. It's intimate but he's not the first dead body I've seen that I knew." Natalie walked over and saw that Dr. Mallard had already opened Chris. Knowing Ducky would understand she put on gloves and brushed her hand over Chris's head, "I'm so sorry Chris. Gibbs's will get whoever did this." Tears filled her eyes and she choked them back. "How are you holding up Ducky?"

He smiled his sad smile at her, "As well as can be expected. It's never easy when it's someone you know, but its my duty by him to make sure it's done properly and thoroughly."

"You are the best man for the job." She put a hand on his shoulder, "I was gonna get everyone some food as they likely haven't eaten. Have you?"

He shook his head, "I've been distracted by our friend because I think I found something in his esophagus."

"I'll add you to my list of food needers then. What did you find?" she asked curiously.

"I think Christopher swallowed something. I'm waiting on X-rays to be sure where it is before I dig it out. I noticed some irritation at the back of his throat here," he said while showing her. She could see the reddness. "I called Gibbs and my X-rays should be ready, wanna wait to see?"

"Sure. Knowing you guys you won't eat what I get right away anyways" she said while he grabbed the X-rays and put them on the screen. "Is that….what is that?" she said looking at the item that darkened part of the esophagus. Ducky took some measurements and measured Chris and marked where he needed to make his incision.

Gibbs walked in, "What did you find Ducky."

"We were just about to find out." Ducky started cutting while he spoke, "It appears Christopher swallowed something."

"Okay.." Gibbs watched as Ducky pulled it out. "Is that a memory card?"

"Has anyone seen his camera?" Ducky asked putting the chip into an evidence bag for Abby.

"Ducky do you think whoever cut him open was looking for this?" Gibbs asked.

"You can bet on it," said Nat, "sorry, it's just, disemboweling someone you've shot that bled out or is bleeding out is pointless. Not unless there was other mutilations going on. The psychology of it doesn't match, but disemboweling someone to look for something does."

"Absolutely," Ducky concurred.

"I wanna know what's on that and why someone would murder for it." Gibbs took off to head back upstairs and Natalie followed.

"Gibbs?" she asked sneaking into the elevator. "I'm sorry if I stepped on any toes. I'm not an investigator but I have studied the way people think, even criminals and murderers."

"Don't apologise," Gibbs said.

"Sign of weakness" she replied with a smile. "McGee may have mentioned something."

Gibbs chuckled, "Your insights are always welcome."

The doors opened and before Gibbs could step out Natalie stood in front of him. He gave her a glare, "I know you won't talk, but I'm gonna say it anyway, I'm here whenever you need me." And with that she turned and walked away. Talks with Gibbs were always difficult. He wanted to help with her study but he hated the psychology unless it suited his investigations. The most they had talked about was that he did wood crafts and was building a sailboat in his spare time. She knew he was a Marine and felt responsible for keeping the men and women in the navy and marines safe. He took his job seriously but also enjoyed teasing people.

She grabbed her wallet and left to go to the cafeteria on base. It would still be open and she could grab some food for everyone. The "Mess" as they called it was shutting the hot food sections down so she went to the coolers to grab things. She grabbed a few sandwiches and wraps as well as some veggies and dip. The selections were limited so she went back with two tuna salads, a chicken salad, a roast beef, a veggie wrap and a chicken wrap. She snagged some protein bars as well. They were all currently in a bag and she had two trays of drinks. She had coffee for everyone the way they liked it and a tea for herself. She tossed a couple bottles of water into the bag before she left as well. An off-duty officer offered to help her carry everything but she declined.

Walking into the bull pen she noticed everyone busy and started dishing out food. She had an idea on what people liked so it wasn't hard. Though the men gave her strange looks when she put the veggies and dip in front of them as well as Kate. "They are good for you, just eat them" she ordered before taking off with the rest of her deliveries.

She decided to go back upstairs with her own snack and worked on her own doctoral thesis. She needed a rough outline and examples to be completed by next week and she was getting along wonderfully. She would glance at the only people still working this late and knew she would wait all night for them if she needed to. Her cell rang and it was her grandfather.

"Hey Natalie," he said when she answered. "I spoke with George, he had actually met Chris's mother and she told him something had happened. He was still very grateful that I stopped by. It was hard. They've made arrangements and I'm e-mailing the details to NCIS personnel and you. George may call you and I hope that's alright. I'm still with him."

"No of course, I'm here if he would like to talk." Natalie hung up shortly after and warned the team that the arrangements had been made.

Her phone rang again and this time it wasn't a number she recognized and assumed it was George. To get a little privacy she walked away and went upstairs on the balcony. "Hello, Natalie Kane speaking."

"Natty, baby, I finally found you." Said a male voice.

"Excuse me do I know you?"

"Aww I'm hurt." He chuckled, "I've been waiting a long time to talk to you. Look I'm sorry about everything and you know I have only every cared about you. We are forever you and I."

Natalie's hold body went cold. She new that voice, "Leave me alone, never call me again." She hung up and called her cell carrier to block the number. So he was alive. He survived the crash. I always felt like it wouldn't be over until the found your body, she thought to herself.

"Everything okay?" came a deep voice behind her and she jumped.

"Gibbs you scared me!" she admonished. "Yes, everything is fine. Or will be." She smiled and went back downstairs.


	16. mini update

So sorry you guys. You've all been super patient while I've been busy and struggling. I don't want the plot to feel forced or too fast so I've been editing what I have a little but I should have an update in the next few days (I'm thinking this weekend).

Just be forewarned with creepy guy back things get kicked into high gear a little, especially with the team still dealing with Pachi's death. Aaaaannnnnd here's a mini spoiler, someone else finds out about the attraction between Natalie and Gibbs!


	17. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Gibbs POV

He had just came back from talking with Abby and noticed Natalie was on the phone upstairs. He couldn't help checking her out again as he had never seen her in a dress before. She looked beautiful. He was admiring her when he noticed her body went stiff and she turned white. He made his way to the rear elevator and went upstairs to investigate. He didn't want to intrude but couldn't help being worried. He heard her asking for a number to be blocked. He felt a surge of protectiveness.

"Everything okay?" he asked her. It apparently startled her as she had jumped.

"Gibbs, you scared me!" she said. "Yes, everything is fine. Or will be." She gave him a sweet smile, yet he could tell she was still bothered by the call. She walked back downstairs answering her phone again. When she smiled and seemed to relax Gibbs let himself refocus on Pachi's murder investigation.

They had a lead they were following and it was time everyone went home to get some sleep. They couldn't do anymore tonight.

"Go home guys." He explained, "Get some rest. We'll pick this up again in the morning."

"-Well if you need anything or just wanna talk you let me know. And again I am very sorry for your loss" said Natalie as Gibbs walked over.

"Need a ride?" he asked her. She nodded and gathered her things.

She smirked, "On one condition, you have to open up a bit more about yourself. I know you are private Gibbs but your lack of opening up is starting to effect my ability to complete my paper. If you don't open up I may have to drop you."

Gibbs nodded. He hated talking about himself. He hated bringing up the past. It was too painful and really what was the point. It happened and nothing anyone said or did would change that. He led her out of the building to his car and they got in.

"I'm not sure what to say…" he said as he started the car.

"Lets start simply, I know you said you like carpentry and are working on a boat. You live alone then?" she asked him.

"Yep" he answered.

She chuckled and Gibbs loved the sound. "I heard from around the office you've been married before. I'm going to take a wild guess that you're more married to the job than you ever were to them?"

He chuckled, "I'm sure my ex-wives would say that."

"Why marry then?" she asked earnestly.

"I don't know anymore." He was honest with her. He usually made a back handed comment about marriage or that he thought he was in love, they were pressuring for more etc.

"That's okay. Lots of people don't know why they do what they do." They sat in silence for a bit before she asked, "You said you were a marine. Any good stories?"

He shook his head and smiled, "Maybe, but the best stuff from that time of my life was because of the people I was with or knew, not necessarily story worthy."

She nodded her head, "Have you stayed in touch with many of your company?"

"Some."

"What were you like back then? Monosyllabic like today?" she teased.

"No, I worked hard, had morals." He sighed before mumbling out the one thing he could never really mention to anyone, "married."

Natalie got very quiet. "The first I'd say by your demeanor." Gibbs could only nod in response. His chest hurt thinking of Kelly and Shannon. Natalie laid a hand on his right arm, "You don't have to say anything else and I won't ask. Gibbs you obviously have a troubled background and I would never push someone to talk about their struggles. I won't bring it up again." She turned then with her hands back in her lap and stared out into the night.

Gibbs reached over and held her hand, "Thanks" he said. Soon enough they were at her building and with the lateness of the hour Gibbs parked and walked her in. "I know it's a secure building, but I'd feel better knowing you were safe."

Natalie smiled at him and lead him upstairs to her place. "Did you wanna come in? I know its late, but I'm not going to be able to sleep and some company would not be turned away."

"It was that call." Gibbs said as she unlocked her door, "You've been anxious and rubbernecking since we left the car."

Natalie bit her lip and nodded. "Please come in, I don't know who I can turn to. I mean Tom knows a bit but I just can't-" She stopped with her door open standing in the opening. She took a deep breath, "You make me feel safe" she rushed out.

Gibbs nodded his head and said, "Got any coffee?" before gently guiding her into her place.

While Natalie went to make coffee Gibbs sat on the couch. He took in the surroundings. It was a small apartment but it suited her. Parts of it were modernly furnished and others had a homey hippy vibe. He surveyed the sheer amount of books displayed and was impressed.

"Have you read all of these?" he asked gesturing to the wall.

She nodded, "Pretty much. A lot of them are textbooks or academic journals." Gesturing to the mug in her hand she asked, "Black right?"

He murmured his ascent and took the cup. He noted hers had some kind of tea in it. After taking a tentative sip, not sure what kind of coffee she kept he was surprised at how good it was. "I know you like tea more than coffee, surprised… this is good."

"It's a dark Italian roast. It's for the rare occasions I want a real jolt of coffee." She sat beside him on the couch.

Gibbs sat his coffee on the table and asked, "So, the call?"

Nat nodded and looked so scared that Gibbs put an arm around her to make her feel safer. She snuggled in to him, "Promise you won't judge me?" she asked with tears in her eyes. She looked back down so Gibbs tilted her chin up with his other hand.

"Never. Nothing you could ever say would ever make me think less of you" he told her looking into her eyes.

"I mentioned my mom died in a car accident right?" she asked and he nodded. "Well I was in the car as well, but someone else was driving. He…" She choked back some tears and cleared her throat, "He became possessive. He was just a friend but he thought he was in love with me. That we were meant to be and got aggressive. He took us hostage. The police never found his body but assumed he was in the Hudson River somewhere and would wash up at some point. They even had me come in to identify him once but it wasn't him."

Gibbs was angry, he wanted to keep this woman safe at all costs. It made no sense to him. She was too young. She was younger than Abby. He never saw Abby as anything other than a daughter but something about Natalie drew him in.

"He's alive. He found my number, he called. I'm scared, if he knows my number, what else does he know?" She looked to him, "I have to contact NYPD and DC Metro."

"What's his name?" Gibbs asked going into investigative mode, "Does the director know who he is?"

Natalie shook her head no, "I never said names. He assumes like I assumed that he was gone…dead."

"Who Natalie?" Gibbs asked, "We can keep you safe."

"Paul Brown. He's 26…no 27 now."

"Don't worry about contacting NYPD or Metro, with your working with NCIS we can take jurisdiction and do a protective detail." He took a moment to try and think of how they were going to manage this with their current investigation. "Can you take time off work?" he asked.

She nodded, "I'm already taking tomorrow off to be available for NCIS personnel as per Grandpa's request. I think I can get someone to cover classes for a week. My boss and academic supervisor are pretty understanding people."

"Good, I'd say tomorrow make that call. I'll stay tonight and take you in with me tomorrow and talk with the director. You'll have to stay with an agent when off NCIS property and when we get Pachi's case solved I'll have my team work on keeping you safe and get this guy off the streets."

"Right." Natalie looked stunned and said, "Sorry, it's just, this is a lot. I'm usually good at managing strong emotions and stress but this… I don't know. Something about Paul has me completely useless."

Gibbs hugged her, "You're not useless, it's personal. Everything personal makes it harder for people to do their jobs. There's a reason cops can't investigate family and what not." She snuggled into him.

"Thanks Jethro" she whispered and sniffled.

"Why don't you have a shower and get ready for bed." He helped her stand and watched her wipe away a few tears.

"I'm not sure if I could sleep."

"Got any movies? DiNozzo is always saying I should get out more" he chuckled.

She nodded and pointed to a small book shelf around the corner in her living room. "Help yourself."

While Gibbs perused her selection Natalie grabbed her things and slid the door shut to her bedroom before going into the bathroom. Gibbs saw an older movie he remembered seeing once. Who Framed Roger Rabbit. It was a comedy if he remembered and figured that would be best. He heard the shower kick on and had a brief flash of what Natalie must look like naked. He shook his head and focused on what all he was going to need to do tomorrow.

He walked over to her door and locked it, but also checked out the windows to ensure there was no one lingering in the converted mall. He set the movie on the coffee table and finished his coffee. The shower shut off when he was rinsing his mug in her sink and he could hear Nat moving in her bedroom. She appeared a few minutes later in boxer shorts and a big t-shirt. It had the I HEART NYC on the front.

"My mom bought this when we first moved to NYC. It's comforting," she said with a shrug. "What movie?" she asked while they walked into the living room.

"Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" he asked sitting down.

She nodded her head and started shutting off some of the brighter lights leaving a small light from the bedroom and a floor lamp in the living room on before setting up the movie. She came back and settled beside Gibbs for the movie.

Sure enough half way through Gibbs felt her slump into him, asleep. He adjusted slightly and let her sleep. She needed it. After the movie was over he used the remotes to shut everything off and was afraid if he woke her she might not get back to sleep so he got comfy and slept with her on the couch in her arms. If he was honest with himself, it was the most restful sleep he had in ages.


	18. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Natalie POV

Natalie woke up to the sound of a phone ringing, only it wasn't hers. She felt her bed move and that's when she realized she had fallen asleep on Gibbs. She shifted to let him answer his phone and when he turned she couldn't help blushing at the situations. She liked him. He was nice, sweet and very sexy to her. She knew it was unrealistic with their ages but something about him just oozed masculinity and something completely indescribable to her. She smiled and stretched before heading to the kitchen. It was just after 6 and she had gotten a few hours sleep. She started making coffee and some semblance of breakfast.

"Okay Tony, that's great" Gibbs said before following her in. "Tony's setting up surveillance on a person of interest. Looks like Pachi was looking into her too."

"That's good." Natalie said. "Do you want something to eat too?" she asked as the coffee percolated. He nodded and she grabbed some eggs and pre-cooked bacon from her mini fridge. On a second thought she grabbed some cheese as well and made an open faced omelette for each of them. He fixed her a cup of coffee as well and she said, "Sugar and milk, please" when he raised the milk in question.

They sat back at her coffee table, only she had him hold the plates and mugs for a moment while she adjusted the table to become more like a dining table. They ate in silence which was fine with Natalie as she was still reeling from waking up in Gibbs's arms.

"I'm sorry I fell asleep on you last night."

Gibbs gulped some coffee and shoveled more food in his mouth. He said, "It's fine, just glad you could relax a bit."

Natalie nodded and they finished eating in silence. "I'll go get ready and call work. If you leave the dishes I can do them later."

"I'm a man but I do know how to do them," he joked with her, "Get ready, and pack a bag for a few days and nights, I'll do the cleaning up."

Natalie grabbed a bag and started packing and then closed her door to get dressed for the day. It was still unseasonably warm and she picked a pencil skirt in navy blue with a white sleeveless blouse. She grabbed a Navy cropped sleeve sweater to go over it when she was in air conditioning. She picked up a pair of ballet flats in grey and her runners at the door. She called her boss and briefly explained the situation who assured her that she could take as much time as she needed. She promised she would still be available to mark assignments and would be reachable via phone and e-mail.

They left for Gibbs's place so that he could change before work and it was while they were in the car that Natalie remembered something.

"Shit! I have to call Eph. We have training tonight. I'll have to cancel." She quickly got out her cell to call the gym while Gibbs gave her a questioning look. "He's my trainer. Been teaching me self defense and Krav Maga."

"Ahh, he's the one."

Gibbs pulled up to a nice little bungalow style house and they went inside. "I won't be long, I'll shower and change and we can go in 5 minutes."

"Well remember to breath," she joked.

"Marine," he said referring to himself, "I can shower in under 2 minutes."

Natalie chuckled and took the chance to look around his house a little. It was a lot of wood and warm colours. Very masculine with leathers and older fabrics. He had a very old television set and tons of books. There were all kinds of military history and fiction books, as well as encyclopedias. He had numerous books on woodworking and sailing. She even spotted a couple of cook books.

She wasn't surprised at the tidiness or the functionality of everything. With his military background Gibbs wouldn't be the type for clutter. But he was apparently a sentimentalist as she spotted antiques and things a guy wouldn't normally hold on to. She noted that there were a couple of photo albums on the book shelf.

True to his word, Gibbs re-appeared within a few minutes. He was freshly showered and smelled wonderfully. He wore a sage green polo shirt and greyish-green sport coat over a pair of dark grey pants. He ushered her out the door and stopped at the car. "Wanna drive?" he asked her.

"I don't know where to go, and are you sure, my instructor tells me I'm rubbish."

"I'll chance it, and I can give you directions." He tossed her the keys and they got in.

"I've heard from Tony you don't let other people drive normally, what gives," she asked while adjusting the seat and mirrors.

He chuckled, "You deserve the chance to learn without someone saying you're rubbish. Rubbish?" he asked incredulously.

"He's British" she responded and started the car.

"Ahh." Gibbs directed her to back out of the driveway and head left.

Soon enough they were on their way with Natalie gripping the wheel and still jerkily stopping at stop signs.

"Relax your grip," said Gibbs, "and gently and steadily apply pressure to the pedals. Think of the car as an extension of your body."

Natalie took the advice and found it really helped her. At the first set of lights the traffic was slowing and she managed to stop without having Gibbs fly into his seatbelt.

"Good." He smiled at her and she took the moment to notice how relaxed he was in the car. Her instructor always looked like he was about to pounce. It made Natalie feel more confident. "Okay, you're going to turn right here and head for the on-ramp, traffic will be light on the highway this time of morning." She must have looked as anxious about going on the highway as she felt. "You can do this," he assured her.

"Never driven the highway before," she said as she started towards the ramp.

"Just increase your speed, checking your blind spot and mirrors while signaling to merge." When she did so and merged successfully he responded, "Good, just maintain speed and keep and eye on traffic around you. We'll take the 5th exit down, it will be on the right."

10 minutes later and Natalie was successful in exiting the highway and driving back at town speeds. "That was cool."

"You did well. I think you're instructor is the problem, not you, you're doing great" Gibbs told her.

She smiled and confidently drove into the Navy yard and up to the guards gate. They both flashed their IDs and Natalie drove over to the parking area. Gibbs pointed to a spot. It had cars on either side, "Oh god, can't we go to another, with maybe no cars?" she asked looking at it dubiously.

"No, you can do this." He guided her through everything. Never telling her turn now, do this here, just how it is done and let her find her pace with it. She was very slow but managed to not hit either car. However she was crooked in the spot.

"I messed it up." She was shaking her head looking in the mirrors and noticing that there was little space for Gibbs to get out.

"Many people end up a little off centre. Just pull a head a little, adjust yourself and reverse back into the spot."

She did as he suggested and was much straighter and this time Gibbs could exit without wishing he was a toothpick.

"Well done," he praised and they exited the vehicle. "You can leave your overnight and bring your work stuff."

She grabbed her bags and handed him the keys, "Thanks for believing in me" she told him. They set off for the building and for a very busy day.


	19. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Natalie was hanging out with Abby in her lab. Abby hooked up Nat's laptop to the NCIS internet network so that she could get some of her work done. It was nice in the lab and it meant she was in a semi-private space in case anyone needed to talk, which Natalie was glad to see a couple of people took advantage of.

Abby left for a deposition upstairs and her grandfather walked in.

"I spoke with Gibbs," he said sitting on a stool next to Natalie. "I've got NYPD and Metro helping us out and a junior agent doing some background for Gibbs when we get this other investigation behind us. I wish you had told me Nat."

"I was embarassed and scared. All I knew is Gibbs made me feel safe." She suddenly realized how that sounded, "Not that you don't!" she rushed.

"It's alright. I'm just glad you had someone you could turn to." They sat in silence for a moment before he said, "He's a good man, little old though…" and quirked an eyebrow at her.

Natalie blushed horribly, "I guess so," she said before turning back to her work.

"I noticed you sometimes. It's alright. I don't like it, but given some alternatives, I approve of this crush."

Natalie was sure her eyes bulged out of her head and her face had to be on fire it was burning from embarassment so much. "I..uh.."

Tom chuckled, "I'd rather someone younger, but you are vastly mature. And I don't believe Gibbs is aware, so your secret is safe with me."

"Oh God. Kill me now."

They both laughed a little. "I'll see you later. What's happening tonight?"

"DiNozzo and McGee are doing surveillance and I'm staying with Agent Todd. We'll go to the funeral tomorrow before her and Gibb's watch. From there, McGee or DiNozzo will bring me back here for the day."

"Alright, Agent Todd used to protect the president, I can't imagine you could be any safer," Tom said as he was leaving.

Natalie went back to work.

It was much later when Dr. Mallard stopped by with some lunch for them both. They enjoyed a peaceful lunch and he didn't pry into anything which Nat appreciated.

"How's your day going Ducky?" she asked him.

He smiled, "Not bad. Mostly routine paperwork and a few non-urgent matters. How are you holding up?"

"As well as can be expected. Thank you for not indulging in your own curiosity." She smiled and finished her salad.

"Of course we are all curious but you've been a wonderful addition around here and really helped a few people. We care about you. But try very hard to be understanding of people's privacy."

The smiled at each other and when Ducky went to go back to autopsy Natalie hugged him. He wasn't the only one to just stop by and chat for a few minutes during the day. It was something that touched Natalie deeply. People knew something was going on but also seemed to know to keep to themselves. They never pried or bugged. Just little hellos, how are you today and small talk. A few hung around to discuss what losing an NCIS agent meant to them for her dissertation. By the time it was time to go Natalie was actually tired. The stress from the last couple of days had caught up to her.

"Hey, wanna pick up a pizza tonight?" Kate asked her as they were gathering their things."Sounds perfect" Nat responded.

Kate walked her out to the car and had her call in their order to save time. They went in together to pick it up as Kate didn't want Nat out of her sight until they were safely at Kate's place. Kate gave her a tour and gave her some security protocols they were going to follow. Natalie was to sleep with a whistle just in case and Kate would be spending the night on the couch waking up every hour or so to do a security check.

"Doesn't sound like you are going to get much sleep, I feel bad," said Natalie as she dished herself some pizza.

Kate placed a reassuring hand on Nat's shoulder, "Don't you worry about me. This will be a breeze compared to protecting the president." Kate turned the TV on to some sort of home and garden channel and they mostly tuned it out and chatted about their lives, more as friends than business or research. It was comfortable.

Kate talked about growing up with her crazy brothers and how she learned quickly to fight back. She was often like one of the boys, but how she always looked up to her sister. She was always there for Kate's emotional needs.

"So for Thanksgiving we would always go to my aunt and uncle's farm since they had the biggest kitchen and dining area. We'd have my family, theirs, my grandparents, other aunts and uncles and their kids… had to be 25-30 of us all ranging from babies up to our 90 year old great grandma who lived with my Aunt Carol and Uncle Don." The TV was completely forgotten at this point and they two women were curled up at opposite ends of a couch with their own blankets. "I was 16, my brothers were either in high school or college at that point and my sister was working on her master's I think. Anyway we usually ended up making teams and playing touch football. I say 'touch' in the vaguest sense of the word. Generally the boys would get a little rough but would be gentle with whatever girls were playing. Well my cousin Tommy ran for a long pass and tripped and ended up taking down my oldest brother John in the process. The two ended up in a cow patty. Well naturally Jim and Brian, my other brothers were killing themselves laughing. John took offence and on the next play ended up taking down Brian first, who ended up with a black eye. Jim was next with a bad bruise on his lower back from falling into me. At that point I was upset with the lot of them and ended up taking them down one by one. It was one of the messier games. When all was said and done someone needed stitches, someone dislocated a shoulder, there were two dislocated fingers, one broken wrist, countless bruises and cuts and almost everyone had mud or shit on them in the end. The only one unscathed was my youngest cousin Beatrice. So naturally Uncle Don decided that wouldn't do and picked her up dunking her in one of the water troughs. It took my Great grandma to break up the brawl that started over whether or not someone actually made the final touchdown or not. It took two vehicles to take all those needing the hospital there. It's a small town so we were literally the only ones at the ER that night and the doctor and nurses on staff ended up having a good laugh at our family."

"Oh god, they probably thought you were crazy people."

Kate chuckled, "Nah, they were used to seeing some of us at some point on Thanksgivings and 4th of Julys. I don't think we ever had a year where no one had to go. One year was just one, which was one of my aunts who had cut herself peeling sweet potatoes and needed stitches."

"I don't know how I would have fared. I'm an only child. It was always just me and my mom. But we celebrated everything. We even developed strange little traditions because it would just be the two of us."

They sipped their teas before Kate asked, "What kinds of traditions?"

Natalie smiled in memory, "On our birthdays we'd always pick what we wanted for supper. And instead of cake it would always be pie and balloons. They were helium balloons and we would attach birthday wishes and set them free." Nat set her tea down before continuing, "Christmases we would always have neighbors over to share in a feast. Same with Thanksgiving, but on Thanksgiving we would always go to visit a retirement home or homeless shelter and visit with those who didn't have family. Mom said it was important to make people feel loved no matter what had happened in their lives. She said real family never turns their backs on you and real family isn't always blood, sometimes its just people close to you."

"Your mom sounds like an amazing woman" Kate said.

"She was," Natalie sighed, "I try to take the things she preached and continue that in my life. I think that's why Paul was able to… I dunno… fool us maybe? Even when he had mom tied up and scared and crying, she still looked at him like he just needed to be loved by someone. It was the same look she gave the homeless who made bad decisions in life. Like love could fix anything."

"Natalie, it's not anyone's fault. Paul is sick, you should know that better than anyone." Kate hugged her.

"Do I? I feel like I question everything I know."

Kate looked at her and held eye contact, "Let's look at it differently. Don't think of Paul as the guy you knew who was your friend. Look at him as a test subject in a research study you read. What do we know about Mr. X?"

"I dunno Kate…" Natalie trailed off.

"Alright. What would you tell me if I said I have a suspect who has shown obsessive behaviours, stalks a victim and tried to control them and their loved ones? What kind of psyche would I be looking at if they are solitary, very intelligent, meticulous and violent when pushed?"

"I'd say they likely had an emotionally and probably physically abusive past. They are showing signs of declining mental health, possible Obsessive Compulsive, maybe Schizophrenia. I'd want to know if their co-workers, family or friends noticed any signs of mania, depression, self-harm. I'd want to look into their past and have an MRI done. Those with some genetic mental health disorders have them from birth and there really is no fixing it so much as medicating them so they can hopefully live a peaceful life."

"So you're telling me its likely my suspect is just sick, they can't help what's happening to them?" Kate asked her.

"Possibly, but I think the obsessiveness and meticulous behaviors would point more to making choices, maybe as a way of compensating something else in their life."

Kate nodded before asking, "What was Paul's home life like as a kid?"

"A lot of pressure to do well. I think his parents were somewhat absent. Why do you ask?"

"Gibbs sent us everything Abby could pull up about him and I read everything I could. He was never taken to the hospital with any signs of physical abuse and all his school records are clean. If I was to guess, I'd say it points to choices not anything uncontrollable. That doesn't mean he isn't sick. I just think that there was never any signs of him becoming obsessed or stalker-like prior to you. And his family doesn't have enough money to make something like that go away, you know what I mean?"

Natalie nodded in return, "If I didn't know Paul, I'd tell you, you have a dangerous person who's psyche broke and has since made bad decisions."

"So, I'd then tell my victim," Kate started pointedly looking into Nat's eyes, "That they did nothing wrong, there is no way they could have known or done anything differently, regardless of their educational background."

Natalie started to cry, "Kate… I…." she bit her lip unable to find words, "Thank you."

They hugged and stayed that way until Nat felt her tears slow, "I think I kept blaming myself, if I just could have seen the signs, maybe I could have saved Mom." They pulled apart, "You helped me see I couldn't have."

"Come on, let's get ready for bed. It's gonna be an early day tomorrow," Kate said standing up.


	20. My Apologies for the Delay

Hey guys, I am so sorry it's been a while since I updated. Life got very busy (I'm engaged!) and I'm trying to plan out ideas for this story with the ncis time line. I'm struggling a bit with writers block. I'm a perfectionist and it's rearing it's ugly head when I try to write.

Thank you for being patient and all the love and support for this story. I can't believe how many people have liked it so far.

Side note: I have been writing on a tablet which my fiancée took to work with him (he's gone for a few months) so I've been trying to get back into using a lap top. *insert face-palm here* I had part of a chapter written that wasn't uploaded and now I'm struggling to remember stuff.


	21. Chapter 18?

Chapter Who The Heck Knows,

Hey Gang, thanks for patiently waiting. I'm finally just now getting back into this thing. I am writing on a new tablet (long story) and I don't have my original story in front of me with all my notes. So if I have any inconsistancies I'm apologising now. I've had a lot of thoughts on what I want to do and I agree I'd like to have Nat as part of NCIS, so my hope is that during the Pacchi murder that she proves herself as a valuable asset and that it will be Director Shepard that is the one to eventually offer her the job. But who knows if that't where this will go. I tend to let the characters speak to me and just tell their stories. I can try to guide them, but you never know.

Onto Chapter Who The Heck Knows (hopefully I figure this out!!)

Natalie was sitting at NCIS waiting to hear back from Gibbs' team. They found out that their suspect was actually a man and DiNozzo was in serious trouble as they had proof that she was resposible for another crime that Pacchi figured out and was murdered for. Natalie felt grief come over her again. It was sad thinking that Chris was gone and after cleverly figuring out a cold case. His husband would find very little comfort until they caught the murderer.

"Just don't Kate… I don't want to think about it anymore," came the voice of Anthony DiNozzo.

Kate was laughing, "Oh, come on Tony, just tell us."

"Kate. Enough" was Gibbs' sharp reply. "I don't want to hear about it, tease him later."

Natalie stood up, relieved to see everyone back safe. "Tease Tony about what?"

"NO." Tony said, as Kate said "Tony kissed the suspect."

Natalie gave Tony a comforting grasp on his shoulder, "If you need to talk, I'm available, but you have nothing to be ashamed of." He burst out in a beet red blush but went to his desk to type up his report. "So where is our mystery lady?" Nat asked. After everyone's eyes looked down she knew it couldn't be good news.

"Autopsy". Gibbs was swapping items on his desk as he asked, "You ready to go?" She nodded and they started to leave, Gibbs turned around to the team and said, "Remind McGee when he gets up from Abby's that I want a trace on the scumbag." Kate and Tony nodded. Natalie figured Patrick was the scumbag in question. Now that the case was over the team would be focusing on her "case".

Nat and Gibbs walked out of the building to the car. Gibbs took her bags and put them in the trunk and walked her to her door. After ensuring she was safely in he walked around to his side and started the car. "I don't have much for food at home, thought we could stop and pick something up from Giovanni's if you'd like."

"If you are interested in italian it would be cheaper to just go to the grocery store and pick stuff up, I really don't mind cooking," she replied.

"Too late," he chuckled, "I called in an order on the way back to the office." He reached over and held her hand that was drumming on her leg. She hadn't realized how nervous she was. "Got a few different things depending on your tastes. Carbonara, fettuccine alfredo, mushroom risotto, shrimp scampi and tiramisu for dessert."

Natalie's stomach growled loudly, "Apparently my stomach say yes please," she joked. "That sounds a lot better than anything I could make. Well maybe fettuccine, but the rest is a little beyond my skills."

"We'll get you fed." He squeezed her hand giving her butterflies and she couldn't help blushing. She felt silly still in her black dress from Chris's funeral. Kate helped her pull her hair back in a sleek bun and she had let it out hours ago. Now it fell in a horrible mess of mismatched curls around her face. In self-conciousness she tried to tuck it behind her ears yet again.

GIBBS POV

He grinned to himself watching her fidget in the car. Her hand was soft in his and he hoped that holding it would help with some of her nerves. He knew she was still worried about Patrick but could tell by the way she blushed that she was interested in him. He knew he shouldn't want her. She was too young for him, but he couldn't help himself just the same.

"When we get to the restaurant I'll park and you will come in with me. Stay on my left." Gibbs gave the directions as he turned the corner and could see the restaurant. He knew she was used to getting odd bits of directions during her protection detail and wasn't worried about explaining himself.

He parked near the entrance on the street and they walked to the restaurant with her on the inside next to the buildings. Gibbs knew the chances that Patrick knew where they were or would try anything was slim but he was going to play it safe. Better safe than sorry. It was similar to the idea Kate had instilled in Nat, better to attack first and ask questions later. Gibbs fully agreed. Since Natalie knew how to protect herself the team were confident in their abilities to proctect her. But Gibbs knew there was a difference between knowing in the classroom and knowing in reality. Some people still froze. He had been thinking of discussing with Director Morrow trying to get some of the agents at the office to "attempt" something with her to see how she would react and give her some real world practice. He didn't want to say anything to her to test her first.

He opened the door and let her walk through first, keeping an eye out for Patrick or anyone looking suspicious. They walked to the Hostess who was smiling at him in recognition, "Gibbs, got your order at the bar, I'll go grab it for you," she said while handing him his receipt. He pulled cash from his wallet, enough to cover the bill and give a little tip. She handed over two bags of food which Nat took from her before Gibbs could.

"Keep the change," he told her and they were on their way. Gibbs noticed someone in a dark hat outside and pulled Natalie behind him. The person lit a cigarette and Gibbs watched closely as they had then crossed the street. They were soon out of sight and Gibbs allowed Nat to walk to the car. He stopped her from opening the door. Checked under the car first then opened it for her. She gave him a strange look but got in. He handed her the bags then went to the trunk to check there as well, still no signs of anything but Gibbs' gut told him the man in the hat did something. He called McGee from the car while he drove around not heading back to his place.

"McGee," Tim answered.

Gibbs barked out, "McGee, meet me at the coffee shop on L street. Bring gear to check for those tracking things or anything else someone might have attached to the car."

"Yes Bo-" Gibbs had already hung up knowing McGee would comply.

"Are we in danger?" Natalie asked looking at him with a slightly wide eyed look. Gibbs knew she was hiding her fear.

He took her hand and rubbed it reassuringly, "I'm just playing it safe, gut feeling."

30 minutes later and McGee pulled into the lot with Tony. They immediately walked over to Gibbs's car and started doing their thing. He and Natalie were sitting on a park bench. It was why Gibbs chose that spot. It was next to a well lit park and allowed them a chance to eat. Various food containers were open and Gibbs had to coax Nat into eating. Once he reassured her it was probably nothing.

It was not nothing.


	22. chapter 19

Chapter Maybe Something in the Late Teens??

she's just a short one so I will post the next one shortly

NAT POV

Watching two NCIS agents walk over with grim looks on their faces threatened to make Natalie's dinner come back up. McGee was holding something in his hand.

"Boss," Gibbs was already standing when McGee spoke, "Tracker, Tony also found a small incindiary device, disarmed it, its in the back of the van." McGee passed the tracker over to Gibbs. "It's expensive, latest tech. It would actually be kinda cool if it wasn't so scary. It's very near military grade, so you know how good and how far those can track."

"My question is how did he get to you?" Tony asked, "I mean you have to be pretty crafty to sneak up on you boss."

"Headquarters. Must have over heard the last of my dinner order, knew I'd be at Giovanni's. Pull surveillance from the area and watch for a guy in a dark ball cap. Bet you it's him." Gibbs was looking at the tracker, "Any chance you can backtrace this McGee?"

McGee took the tracker back, "If not we might be able to use it to set him up. I'll see what I can do."

"Why a tracker, why a bomb?" Natalie asked very curious. She couldn't quite figure out the motive.

"He may have been watching you and realized you weren't alone. That we were protecting you. If he's half as smart as you say, this was the best way to follow you without being noticed," Tony explained.

"The bomb was small, likely just meant to be a distraction," Tim explained further.

Gibbs gestured to the tracker, "Can you reattach that?" he asked Tim who nodded. "We're going to take the car to a hotel, check in under my name. While we do that I want you to bring another car back for us and we will then head to my place. Scumbag will think we are keeping Natalie at the hotel and we can set him up."

Everyone nodded in understanding and went to do their tasks. Natalie started packing up the food and getting ready to go. "Gibbs, tell me this will end," she pleaded.

"He will spend the rest of his life in prison, or go to an early grave. I promise." He pulled her in for a hug and kissed the top of her head. She snuggled into the warm and comfort he provided.

Their little exchange did not go unnoticed as Tony and Tim nudged each other at the sight of the two. "You know they make a cute, if strange, couple" Tony said.

"Isn't she a little young though?" Tim commented.

"What's the matter McGee, you falling for the redhead?" Tony teased. But McGee blushed and Tony knew he found Nat attractive, "I thought you had a thing for goth forensic techs?"

McGee looked at Tony sternly, "I do."


	23. Chapter 20

Chapter 20?

Forgive my earlier mistaked, I realized it was Paul not Patrick (that's my brother-in-law, he's not a creepy bad guy). I couldn't go back and make the changes yet so I'm starting it back at Paul again. I feel horrible, I'm so sorry folks. Things are heating up in this chapter. Between our hero and heroine and in a totally different sense. Enjoy!

GIBBS POV

He circled around the outside of his house checking everything before getting ready to have a little nap again. He had been having 20 minute catnaps all night. When he wasn't napping he was checking the house for security, checking on Natalie who was sleeping on the couch in the living room (despite him urging her to sleep upstairs in the bed), and carving some small toys for the kids this winter.

He walked back inside and grabbed the toy train he had been working on. He sat on a chair across from the sleeping beauty. She was curled into herself on the couch and looked so small. It took a few sips of whiskey to get her to calm down enough to sleep. It was also after midnight when they got to his place. He had 2 NCIS agents staking out the hotel on the look out for Paul. Tony let them know that it was confirmed the man in the baseball hat tampered with the car, but they couldn't get a clear shot of his face to confirm it was Paul. Abby was diligently working on enhancing reflective surfaces trying to confirm for them. Gibbs made sure to call her an hour ago to tell her to get some sleep too.

Natalie shifted in her sleep and let out a slight whimper. Her breathing started to change, getting faster and shorter. Gibbs figured she was having a nightmare and went to wake her. She startled awake and pushed him away, quickly blinking her eyes. It took her a second to realize it was him and not the thing in her dreams. "Jethro," she breathed before pulling him to her and crawling into his lap. "He had me…" she started to cry, "he was going to hurt me. But you were there, he killed you. It was horrible."

"Shhhh" he told her, "It's okay, just a dream. And I'm too stubborn to be killed." He held her in his arms. He kissed the top of her head again. Only this time she looked up into his eyes and he felt himself drawn into her. He slowly brought his face closer to hers watching her lips. He looked into her eyes and found her watching him back. He gave her a chance to turn away. When she didn't he closed the distance and kissed her lightly at first.

NAT POV

His lips were soft but firm. He tasted like coffee. He gently held her head in his hands and started to deepen the kiss. Natalie accepted this kiss and even opened her mouth further taste him. She pulled back realizing she wasn't as close as she wanted to be.

"Sorry," he said to her but she shook her head.

"Don't be," she crawled to straddle his lap and initiated the next kiss, taking his head in her hands. She had never been so bold before but her body was on fire. She craved him unlike anyone she's ever felt attracted to before.

His hands stroked down her back and held her hips close to him. She felt him harden beneath her. She felt her body respond in kind. She rocked her hips forward without even realizing and Gibbs grabbed her hard and pulled back from the kiss.

"We need to slow this down," he told her, "You're vulnerable."

She tried to catch her breath and nodded knowing he was right. But part of her didn't care. Part of her knew this was right. She rationalized that if it was right, and would happen, that it didn't matter when. And wouldn't it be better when they could take their time anyway?

Gibbs helped her off of him and adjusted himself, "I don't want you to think I don't want you, I do." He sighed, "Very much." He turned to face her, and she couldn't help feeling self-concious. "I'm not sure if I'm the right fit for you. You'd be better off with someone your own age."

She snorted, "Hardly, I've never fit in. Never been the one to do things normally." She took his hand in hers, "Can I be honest with you Jethro?"

He nodded, "Always."

She gulped and braced herself, "I've never felt like this about anyone. I've been attracted to guys before but never like this. I admire you, respect you and…" she paused. He squeezed her hand in reassurance and she took a deep breath, "I like you Jethro, more than I should. I know this makes no sense, my brain tells me you are old enough to be my father, but I don't see you that way."

"Me too," he said kissing her lightly, "You're young enough to be my daughter but all I see is a beautiful, intelligent, brave young woman."

"Geez Gibbs, I think you've just shared more personal information there than ever," she joked. She knew it wasn't true but she couldn't help teasing him. She didn't take compliments well and struggled to tell him he was wrong. She wasn't brave, she wasn't beautiful. She was arguably intelligent, book smart at least.

He gave her a look for the teasing and she smiled. "Why don't we try and get a little more sleep before heading into the office?" he said. This time he pulled her into him and she settled the blanket around them both. It wasn't long before they were both drifting off to sleep.

It was a couple hours later when Gibbs phone went off. He answered it as Natalie sat up. She could only hear his side of the conversation and heard him say Abby and McGee in the same sentence. She figured Tim stayed the night at the office to help Abby. She got up and went to the kitchen to make coffee. It was a little after 5 am. They were only asleep for about an hour but she felt more rested sleeping in Gibbs' arms than she did alone. She started humming a song to herself as she made the coffee. She grabbed Gibbs' Jamaican blend and made it extra strong. She pulled down two mugs. In hers she added two spoons of sugar but kept his empty.

He lightly touched her hips and kissed the top of her head. "They got confirmation it was Paul." She froze, "The agents last night confirmed a man in a black ball cap had loitered for about 20 minutes but left when he realized the hotel had security."

"Okay, so whats the next step?" she asked while she poured the coffee. She handed Gibbs his mug and took a tentative sip of her own.

He sipped approvingly, "I think we set him up, if you're ready to play bait?"

"I think so," she took a deep breath, "Are you sure, you look worried about that?"

He shook his head, "No just thinking. I don't want you put in any more danger than is necessary."

She nodded in return. They sipped coffee in quiet. It was something Natalie loved about Gibbs, he didn't feel the need to fill the silences at all times. "Do we have time for me to shower before we head in?" she asked, patting the unruly hairs on her head. When he nodded she took her coffee upstairs to the bathroom. She was so excited for a hot shower she forgot to grab her change of clothes.

GIBBS POV

He heard the water stop and looked over to the couch and saw Nat's bag. She forgot her clothes. He grabbed it and was heading upstairs when he ran into something wet. He must have startled her and she startled him on the stairs. Her towel had dropped as her hands came up defensively. He dropped her bag upon hitting her and went to grab her so she wouldn't fall. Gibbs had a very naked, very wet, very enticing Natalie in his arms. He pulled her to him and was kissing her before he even knew what his body was doing.

Her arms curled around his neck. Her face as almost at the same height as his, meaning she was on the step above him. His hands traced the water dripping down her back and couldn't help himself grabbing her ass. It was firm, but juicy. She let out a little moan and that was like a shock of ice to his system. What was he doing molesting her in his stairwell!

"I'm sorry," he said pulling her back from him and closing his eyes in modesty. "I don't know what came over me." He blindly reached down for the towel at his feet and handed it to her. "I was bringing your bag."

She was breathing heavily and lightly touched his arm so he opened his eyes looking down. He saw that she had the towel back on. "Yeah, I forgot it," was all she could say. She was flushed, one hand over her heart and trying to get her breathing back in order. He handed her the bag and she turned around going back upstairs. Gibbs followed shortly after the bathroom door shut. He was wet and needed to change. And maybe needed to do something about the raging hard on he kept getting around her. He didn't have time to do anything this morning but he was sure he would be remembering the feel of her under his hands and the feel of her breasts pressed to his chest all day.

NAT POV

They were just heading out when Gibb's phone rang again, "Gibbs", he answered. "Okay meet you there." He did a quick u-turn and headed towards to hotel. "An explosion happened at the hotel this morning. No one was hurt but a couple of rooms are demolished on the ground floor."

Natalie gasped, "Oh my God."

"We're going to make sure everyone has their duties and then head into the office. DiNozzo and Kate are on scene." He was driving well over the speed limit and Natalie could see the stress he was feeling in how hard he was gripping the steering wheel.

Natalie walked with Gibbs towards his team. It looked like Tony was taking pictured and Kate was bagging evidence. Gibbs had her wait near them and went to talk to the manager. Natalie was just standing around watching everyone when she was grabbed from behind.

Instinct took over at first and she tried to pull away before remembering her training. A hand covered her mouth before she could scream so she stepped back into the person knocking them both off balance and falling to the ground. She placed a few good hits before rolling off the individual and standing up ready to fight. She was breathing heavy and was very confused when she saw a groaning McGee holding his private area. Clapping ensued.

"Good, you can handle the unexpected outside of the classroom," Gibbs said walking over, "Good job McGee."

Natalie helped McGee up, "I'm sorry, what just happened?"

"Gibbs told McGee to try to take you down, he wanted to make sure you could handle yourself," Kate explained. "He's got various agents prepared to try to take you to keep you on your toes and prepared to fight Paul if needed." Kate patted her on the back, "We needed to make sure your abilities could extend beyond prepared fighting."

"Right." Nat was still shook but also grateful to know that her body knew what to do even if she was scared. It took her a moment to override the fear response but when she did she had to admit it went well. "Sorry Tim, are you okay?" she asked as he was still holding his groin.

"I'm fine, you hit hard," he said before walking back over to his kit to keep working.

Gibbs nodded at everyone and closed his notebook. He steared her out of the hotel back to the car. "I'm not exactly happy you didn't tell me about this but I understand why. Part of me appreciates that I get to practice in a safe environment"

They drove to HQ in mostly silence until he said, "I know you will be on alert with Paul loose, and the best practice is not knowing who might attack so you won't know which agents I've asked to simulate if Paul grabs you. They've been told to do everything in their power to take you, and warned that you know how to fight." They pulled up to the front gate and were quickly admitted. Soon enough they were walking into the elevator when Gibbs was called back by security. "Head on up, I'll be right there."

Natalie got in and pressed the number for their floor. It stopped at the next floor to let someone on. They were unassuming and texting. Next she knew the elevator had stopped and she was fighting the male in the elevator. They were trying to subdue her and were preparing the elevator to go to the basement at the same time. Natalie was grabbed and slammed into the elevator hard enough to see stars. They got her to the ground before she could react. She rolled as they tried to hit her and struck out at them in response. The hit was rushed and barely hit. She wrapped her legs around the assailant as they went to stand and started hitting their temple with a fist and jabbed her fingers in their throat choking them. They dropped her and she just barely got her feet under her. The elevator dinged and she immediately ran out seeing the evidence garage. She stood to the side waiting for her attacker to exit and struck a kick at their knee knocking them off balance. She then grabbed an arm twisting to hold them in a position Eph had shown her. By then the attacker went limp and let her take him to the floor. They knew she had them.

"Damn, Gibbs wasn't lying when he said it would be hard" the agent said. By now Nat figured out they were NCIS and let them go. Behind her the elevator opened showing Gibbs and her grandfather as they exited.

"I watched on security, I'm impressed," said Director Morrow. "When Gibbs presented his idea to me I was worried but you're even better than when I saw you at your class."

Natalie was grinning. She was also a little out of breath. Whoever this agent was had her working harder than McGee. She also enjoyed trying closed quarter combat. "That was actually kinda fun. Once the immediate fear went away," she told them. She shook the hand of the agent who was now sporting a couple spots that would bruise later, "Thanks for making me really work for it. You were great" she told him.

"Agent David Reynolds, Gibbs asked for me because he knew I wasn't in your study so you wouldn't immediately recognize me." He shook her hand in return. Gibbs clapped her on the back in recognition of her good job. "I'm sorry if I hurt you but I was told to make it real. I thought close combat would be good. Had security hold Gibbs up for me and let me know when you got here to make sure I was in position."

"Nah, I'll be fine. Little headache maybe, but it was good practice, thanks again Agent Reynolds."

Reynolds went back to work and Natalie went back upstairs with Gibbs and the Director. If today kept up like this she was going to be in for a long ass day. "So do I have more of this to look forward to," she jokingly asked.

"Yep." Ever monosylablic our Gibbs, she thought. "I'm putting a plan in place for tomorrow, we want to end this before he escalates and hurts someone, especially you."

"I trust Gibbs, and I trust that you can keep yourself safe, I wouldn't have authorized this if I didn't believe it," her grandfather said.


	24. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

It had been a long day. Luckily this time away from the university gave Natalie plenty of time to interview NCIS employees. In between her various attacks from agents. So far she had been attacked 3 times since the elevator incident. One agent even pulled a gun (it wasn't loaded) but they wanted to see if she could disarm them. It was tough going. She didn't manage and heard the click signaling her loss of that fight. That agent was Kate.

She had been using a desk in the bullpen for the last hour typing up notes and organizing an outline for her thesis. Gibbs' team had been in and out most of the day getting evidence on Paul's explosion at the Hotel. Security confirmed it was him who placed the device. It was larger than the one he placed on the car, and he managed to place it beneath the room Gibbs had reserved. It wasn't enough to do damage to that floor but it would have been felt. It was designed to scare her. If she was honest, it was scaring her. It was one thing to be attacked or kidnapped and another thing entirely to be blown up.

She finished her outline and thesis statement. She even managed to get her opening chapter finished and sent to her academic advisor. Hopefully with his approval she would be able to get to writing her report. She wanted to have most of it completed by next semester so that she could focus on actually helping some of the agents with some of their problems and finish her paper with a conclusion of results rather than hopes for the future.

She must have been very distracted because she didn't notice the team got back again. This time with food. Pizza! Gibbs had grabbed her some and was walking over to give it to her. "Don't eat it all DiNozzo, leave some for everyone!" Kate snarked at him.

"Buff I'm sarwing."

"Chew first, then speak."

Tony chewed quickly then swallowed, "But I'm starving. I haven't eated since this morning and its nearly 6 o'clock."

"Whatever." Kate was dabbing some grease off her slices before biting in.

Natalie couldn't help but smile at the two bickering agents. She knew they had the hots for each other and in a different situation they may have actually gone out, but in this job it's important to keep relationships as professional as possible. Course that didn't stop agents from dating as there was no NCIS policy against it. Just a Gibbs policy. "Thanks," she said as she took a bite. After chewing and swallowing she said, "I didn't realize it had gotten so late. I got so wrapped up with work. Good thing no one tried to attack me at the desk. Kate wouldn't have been the only one to beat me today."

"I'll have you know you did remarkably well," Kate called over across the bullpen. "After Jacobs mentioned he pulled a knife on you I was disappointed because I was going to try that. He said you did well, got a pressure point so he dropped it pretty quickly. I wanted to try something new, and it's something we would do with the president at times as part of his training."

"Wow, I feel honoured." Natalie devoured her slices as Gibbs and Tony ate mostly in silence.

Tony couldn't not take part in a conversation of course, "I just don't get why you didn't ask me?" he asked.

Gibbs chuckled, "DiNozzo, did you really want to get your ass kicked by Nat?"

"You don't know that, I'm unpredictable!" he argued.

"Okay Tony, after lunch lets you and I take it to the mat at the gym?" Natalie offered.

Tony grinned shoving half a slice in his mouth, "Yooo oon."

"DINOZZO, what did I say about talking with your mouth full!" Kate sniped.

Tony's response was a non-verbal unkind gesture.

Soon enough they were in the outer building that held the NCIS training centre and gym. They had changed (Kate leant Natalie her clean gym clothes) and wrapping their hands. Tony was already bouncy and talking smack. Nat was just quietly preparing.

"Watch his left hook, he usually jabs with his right immediately after," Gibbs told her as he handed her a mouth guard. Tony was all ready to go so Natalie decided to do a few stretches first. She was bruising in a few spots from her spars of the day and a muscle in her thigh would protest at times from a hard fall with Agent Hellyer this afternoon.

They circled each other giving some half hearted attacks before Tony lunged for real. He was right. He was unpredictable at times but Natalie saw that he held himself too loose. His hits were hard, but he avoided her head. She dropped when he tried hitting her and swept his legs out from under him. She pounced and tried to grab an arm to control his movement. He was squirrely and manged to flip her. She wrapped a leg up by his shoulder and one around his middle effectively making his left arm useless. She used her arms and weight to turn and twisted him to his side. He tried kicked and pulling her legs apart but she had him locked. She locked his right arm in another hold and waited for him to tap out. His response was to try and stand. He managed to lift her with his one arm in hold so she let it go and lifted herself up so she was almost sitting on him. She quickly loosened her grip letting herself drop and re-gripped Tony while she brought him down in a twisting motion. They hit the mat hard, Tony almost completely on his face. She let him go part way down and managed to jump on top of his back. She grapped both arms and pulled them hard behind him and felt satisfaction when he called "UNCLE".

"Jesus, okay, Gibbs you were right," he said rubbing his sore face, and shoulders. His nose was bleeding slightly so Nat knew he hit hard.

"Sorry Tony, are you okay?" she asked him peering up at his face.

Tony nodded while pinching his nose to stop the blood, "Yeah, Kate can I have a tampon?"

"Why are you asking me?" she replied.

Tony gestured at his face as the blood starting flowing faster, "Because I think my nose is broken."

Natalie rushed to hug him, "I'm so sorry Tony!"

She glanced up as Kate ran back with a tampon for his nose. She saw Gibbs grinning at her. "I don't know why anyone worried about you. That was the most impressive hand-to-hand I've seen today" he told her. "DiNozzo, you need to see Ducky?" he asked.

Tony shook his head. "Nah, I'll be fine. I think my ego is more hurt. How the hell did you do that spinny twisty thing? One minute I'm standing, the next my face is hitting the floor."

"Yeah, I want to learn to do that." Kate chimed in.

"It's really hard, I didn't even do it right. I'm still learning it from Eph right now. It's hard for him to show me since he's not little enough to get up on someone like that. The best we manage is me getting into position and him moving me in the motion. I've seen it done on tape though, I'll bring it by for you guys to see."

"I think we're ready for tomorrow," Gibbs told them. "Lets head to Abby's lab to go over the plan."


	25. Chapter 22

Mhuahahaha: 2 chapters in one day!! 22 is one of my lucky numbers, I was born on the 22nd. Its a short chapter with a cliffhanger-esque ending. Mostly because I'm not sure which was I should go and want your opinions. So please leave a review to let me know what you want to read.

Chapter 22

They had been in Abby's lab for over an hour going over every little detail for the set up. They were going to be staying at another hotel and making sure Paul was aware of it. Nothing too noticeable or else he would know he was being set up. They knew it would take him a bit of time to figure out a plan. The hope was that he would make whatever attempts tomorrow night. Natalie would be staying in the room from tonight until then. Gibbs would be in and out with her as well as his team. They would make everything appear normal with agents stationed outside for watch duty.

Nat was getting a headache from looking at all the floorplans and exit strategies. McGee was making sure she had a tracker on her in case Paul got the drop on them so they could follow. She was now sporting a simple looking bracelet with a GPS tracker in it. It was waterproof so she could shower and not worry. She had gotten 2 phone calls while they were going over everything. One from her grandfather confirming agents were set and he would be in MTAC or his office until everything was settled. The other was from her trainer. Ephraim wanted to make sure she was still okay as he hadn't heard any updates.

Truth was, she was far from okay. She missed her own place. She hated the constant vigilance and fear that plagued her for over a week now. She just wanted to feel safe and secure. The only way she felt that now was in Gibbs' arms. Not that she could request a hug right now. Maybe later, she thought.

"Everyone knows what to do and where they are set up. Remember I want staggered arrivals in disguise in case he knows what you guys look like. McGee, I want you and Abby to run coms and video from MTAC and here." Gibbs was in full protection and boss mode. Natalie thought it was vaguely hot how he barked orders. She pictured him in the Marines barking orders and following commands. He was always in such control. Except with that terrorist that shot Gerald. He was very different and nearly unhinged trying to find him. Her problem with Paul helped distract him a bit but she imagined he would be just as focused again trying to find that particular bastard. Gibbs liked to get his man.

Natalie and Gibbs entered the hotel together. Visible but not too visible. An agent handed over their room key in the lobby and headed out to their partner in the car stationed somewhere outside. It was one of the ones who had practiced with her today. She smiled in thanks. They went up to the 5th floor. 1st floor was the lobby, fitness center and restaurants. 2nd floor was mostly conference and business centers. 3rd had the spa and pool as well rooms. 4th floor was under renovation. If they had a room any higher up and they risked any number of exit strategies that they couldn't cover. Tony and Kate had a room on the 6th floor from which they were going to be monitoring. It was also where anyone could crash between their "protection" duty with Natalie. Mostly it was just going to be waiting around.

Natalie was starving and exhausted. She needed a hot bath for her sore muscles and a snack. Gibbs left her to run her bath to grab ice down on 3. He had called for some room service to be delivered in 20 minutes. Turkey sandwich and chamomile tea for Nat and ham and coffee for him. Natalie was comfortably in her bath with epsom salts when she heard Gibbs come back with the ice. She needed an icepack for her one knee which was beginning to bruise.

Gibbs said, "I'm back, food should be up soon, but don't rush." The door was left ajar, per his request. She told him okay and continued to enjoy her comfort. She couldn't get rid of the pit in her stomach or the anxious feeling coursing through her body. She knew that wouldn't end until Paul was behind bars, but at least the hot water was soothing her muscles.

Room service came and went and the water had begun to chill before Natalie came out. She must have been too quiet because Gibbs had asked if she fell asleep in there at one point. She said no rather petulantly.

GIBBS POV

He worried at one point because it was so quiet in there. But he was also hyper aware of every move she made in that water so he was happy they were few and far between. Each move brought a visual of a naked Nat with water caressing her the way he wanted to be. He would remember the feel of her naked wet body and his hard on was getting unbearably painful. She emerged in a soft yellow tank top and boxer shorts. He could slightly see through the material and could see she wasn't wearing underwear and her nipples were hard. He quickly averted his gaze and admonished himself for some very dirty thoughts going through his head. He thought his imagination had gone wild when he heard her moan. His head snapped in her direction to see her chewing her sandwich.

"So good," she moaned around another bite. "So hungry."

I'm going to die of blue balls.

Gibbs sat down and continued sipping his coffee having already eaten his sandwich. "Have a seat and put some ice on that knee," he told her. She followed his instructions taking her tea with her. When she got settled on the bed Gibbs was surprised by a view from the mirror. It was showing her slightly splayed legs with the shorts gaping slightly. He could see her. Slight red curls still damp from her bath. Puffy lips. He cleared his throat and re-adjusted his sitting position trying desperately to make himself less hard. He thought of Paul and it helped a little. Sadly, seeing her shapely legs, wet hair and hard nipples kept distracting him.

Natalie got up to get rid of her ice and tea cup about a half hour later. They had news playing in the background but neither really paying attention. Just happily sitting in silence. She went over to her bag and bent over. Gibbs couldn't take it any more. They were likely safe for tonight. Extra agents undercover watching the lobby, ones outside, even a couple of them in different rooms. He got up and walked up behind her while she was digging in her bag. She slowly stood and he pulled her back into him. He kissed her neck and shoulder.

Question to my readers: who's POV would you rather for a sexy time scene? Gibbs or Nat? I'll wait to post for feedback but will keep writing. I'll write out both just in case. (Not gonna lie, I'm definitely writing Gibbs POV first as he's the one talking in my head, but I'm curious about Natalie's view, just feels like a bit of a struggle at the moment)


	26. Chapter 23

**_Hey guys, WARNING: this is one of the reason I can only post in Mature, it gets very mature audience only in this chapter. Sexy sexy times. (Sorry for the wait, I was struggling to get this out and I don't know why) Hope it's everything you've been waiting for as the story has basically been building up to this and the confrontation (which I'm working on shortly). Well on with the show!_**

Chapter 23 GIBBS POV

She tasted amazing. She moaned and tilted her head back giving him even more access to her neck. His hands started roaming around her hips and up her body. He ground himself against her ass. "Jethro," she moaned, rubbing herself back against him. "Can we do this?" she asked turning slightly to look at him.

"Hell yes," he responded taking his hand from her squeezing her breast to run it up her neck and cup her jaw. He put all his feelings into his kiss. It was passionate and hot, filled with sucking, biting and teasing motions. She started unbuttoning his shirt. "I'm nothing special to look at," he told her.

She pulled his shirt from his body and said, "Everything I see, I like," and began running her hands over his chest. He bent to keep kissing her as her arms circled his neck. She went on her tip toes and pushed herself up against him much like earlier.

His hands had a mind of their own. They were caressing, squeezing and pulling at her body before he had enough and wanted to touch skin. He pulled her shirt off and over her head breaking their kiss. She was stunningly beautiful. Panting made her breasts rise and fall quickly. She had a faint blush spreading all over her. He wasn't sure if it was shyness or arousal. Maybe both. He lightly touched the underside of her left breast, "Beautiful," he whispered. He suddenly grabbed her to pull her back onto the bed on top of him before continuing to make out.

He loved kissing. Making out. It was always a favourite. The build up to the main event. Getting lost into each other. His left hand was roaming her naked back while his right was gripping her head as they kissed. She was straddled on him and lightly rubbing herself onto him. Probably unconsciously. He could feel her breast pressed to his chest and it felt wonderful. His left hand came up to caress her cheek while his right made a slow pass down her side to grip her hip while he thrust up making her gasp.

"Jethro," she moaned and he knew she could feel him through his pants. He wanted her badly but wanted to make sure she was ready. It was always in the back of his mind that she was young and different from other women. She likely didn't have much experience and he wanted this to be good for her. He always cared more that his lovers enjoyed themselves than his own pleasure. His right hand moved to slip under her waistband and caress her through her curls. He wanted to feel the slick sweetness that always came with a woman. They were always so soft and sweet.

She was slightly wet when he ran a finger over her clit. She gasped at the contact and pushed back against his hand. "Shhhh I got you," he whispered as he continued to explore her body more intimately. His fingers spread her slightly and dipped into her core where she was much wetter and drew circles with that wetness around her clit. He was kissing her cheeks and jaw and lightly sucking on her neck.

"More," she said, sitting up. He sat up with her and helped her pull off her shorts while she went to work on his belt. Soon enough she was laying naked beside him while he was clad in only his underwear. Her delicate but capable hands were toying with his waistband like she wanted to explore more herself but was too unsure of herself. He took her hand in his, making her caress him through the material. She blushed deeply but took over pleasuring him on her own and was gaining the confidence she needed to finally dip her hand beneath and touch him skin to skin.

She lightly gripped him around his head and slowly moved her hand down the shaft to the base. At the base she tentatively squeezed before starting to pump up and down on him. He returned the favour by resuming his attention to her. They were kissing and panting and working each other up before Gibbs pulled her hand out of his underwear. She looked worried so he reassured her, "It feels too good," he said.

Gibbs stood up off the bed, dropping his drawers and stooping towards his pants. He bought condoms a few days ago and put one in his wallet. After grabbing it, he put it on the bed and crawled on to kiss her. His body was only half covering her when he lowered his head to take the nearest nipple into his mouth. Her body arched at the contact and a low long moan escaped her throat. He did the same to the other breast before kissing his way down her stomach.

When he reached her navel he dipped his tongue in before tracing it from hip to hip above her mound. She was squirming and moaning and caressing his head the entire time, but when he first licked her slit she grabbed his hair and would have come off the bed had he not held her hip down. He loved her reactions. She was so honest and open with him. Literally open, as her legs fell to the side. He positioned himself between them, spread her lips and began lapping up her wetness. She tasted musky and sweet. Very light flavour unlike some women he'd been with.

When he thought she was ready he slowly pushed his middle finger inside her feeling for that special spot along the wall that would make her feel everything. He knew when he first touched it because he could feel her clench around his finger. He began pumping slowly at first and picking up speed. He went from lapping and kissing her to sucking and flicking his tongue over her nub. She was wild, bucking into his face and when he looked up at her, her hands were gripping the sheet and her head kept going from side to side. It was too much for me. He wanted to be inside her.

He quickly grabbed the condom, putting it on. He continued to stroke her inside as he leaned over her to kiss her. She moaned into his mouth and he didn't know if it was because of his manipulations or tasting herself and he didn't care. He removed his hand and positioned himself to enter her. He teased them both a little with the tip first before slowly entering her. Natalie's hands clung to his shoulders and she arched her back as Gibbs bottomed out. She was tight and slick. Her walls gripped him hard as he backed out before plunging back in. She let out a slight "Umph" before a long moan escaped her again. He couldn't take it. She felt too good. She was beautiful and passionate and Gibbs started to pick up the pace.

The bed had begun to make a slight noise. He could hear the slap-slap-slap of their bodies meeting one another. Her hips were rising to meet him and he hoped he could make her come before he did. She was milking him with her vagina nearly sending him over the edge when he felt the walls clamp down around him and a loud moan escaped her. He picked up the pace wanting to send her further over the edge. She was saying "Oh God, oh Jethro," like a mantra as he pushed her orgasm even higher. When she let out a slight scream he couldn't hold back any longer and came himself.

They were both heavily panting on the bed and Gibbs felt like a young buck again. He hadn't been able to do something that vigorous in a while. He hadn't felt that hard since his younger days. This woman was magic and special. He pulled the condom off tossing it to the floor not caring enough to leave Natalie yet. He pulled her to him and she rested her head on his shoulder. He kissed her forehead.

"Wow," she said looking up at him. "I had no idea it could be that good."

Gibbs worried a moment that it was her first time, "Are you a virgin?" he asked quietly.

She chuckled, "No, but its pretty close. One guy, one time." She leaned over to kiss him, "But you are well worth the wait." He grinned.

"You too," he told her.

 ** _Well what did you think? Was it everything you wanted it to be? Do you need a cold shower now? (tee hee). Let me know what you think and I do like your suggestions of Nat having flashbacks to it to show her side._**


	27. Chapter 24

Hey everyone! Thanks for all the wonderful comments and support for this series. Also very grateful that you are so patient with my uploads. Been going through a lot personally lately and just getting back to this again after a few months. The best I can see is a couple more chapters. I need to settle this issue with Paul, and am planning to get this up to her graduation and becoming a Doctor in Psychology and Biology. All in all it should only be a few more chapters at most. But I am open to ideas on furthering this series if you are interested so please let me know in the comments. Also any ideas for future seasons or plots that would be great too. I don't want to really change anything about the show itself (Kate's death, Gibbs leaving NCIS etc). Some stuff I like changing in shows but I feel these aspects are crucial to the show. Now onto the chapter… there may be some OOC Gibbs, but I think he's put in the effort, personally. Action ahead!

Chapter 24 Natalie POV

Natalie woke to an empty bed. Luckily there was at least a note left for her. She smiled seeing Gibbs neat scrawl.

"Nat,

Couldn't bring myself to wake you. Needed to work, you'll be safe. Remember we are watching. Signs of Paul last night so be on the lookout. Remember we need him to make a move before we can get him. Burn this. Xo Gibbs."

She called down to room service for breakfast while she found a match book and the metal trash can in the bathroom. She made sure the trash was empty and burned the note. Not understanding why, only trusting Gibbs to know what to do.

She waited almost 30 minutes for her basic eggs and toast breakfast. Apparently, they were busy. She didn't have much planned today but did mean to get to the business center to get some work done. She needed a space outside the room to spread out a bit. She had marking to do, writing to do and keep an eye out for Paul. There was a bonus to her working on her laptop, McGee. He was patched in and could give her messages sneakily.

She brought her bag down to the center and got herself set up on a large table. Getting papers organized and her laptop set up she noticed the text box in the corner pop up. Morning Sexy! it said. She shook her head before responding McGee, you'll get in trouble for that. Not McGee, Abby, Tim's here, just wanted to say HI Hi Abby, gotta work if I plan to graduate and get marks in Workaholic Damn straight! I've got an eye on the exits and will warn you if we see Paul-McGee now Morning McGee!

It took her an hour to get her notes typed up form her latest interviews as well as observations. She had also decided to start a report for the Director with suggested programs or training that could be of use to the NCIS employees. She also was including a report that suggested who should be seeing someone on a semi-regular basis, or who could benefit from it. She noted that some agents were making job performance gains after starting their conversations. Kate for one seemed less stressed and was becoming better at time management. Abby was always going to throw herself into the work she was so very passionate about but was beginning to open up to the idea of an assistant to help the workload. She was learning the value of self-care, that it was just as important and would make her a more productive employee. She couldn't be convinced that more sleep and less CafPows. Natalie hoped the reports would be beneficial.

She was on her 4th paper grading when she noticed the text bar on her laptop. Suspicious male entering rear of hotel. Avoiding cameras Agents confirm suspect in building, 1st floor lobby. Suspect entering elevator Off on 5th Floor

Natalie couldn't help but feel nervous knowing Paul was around. She wanted to run. Her body screamed at her to just run but she knew they needed to catch him first. She was bait. Bait didn't run. She typed back to McGee acknowledged, will continue grading. Agents on 2nd floor lounge as back-up Suspect knocking on room door and loitering around

Natalie felt a shiver down her back but put her mind on her task. While she wasn't exactly hiding, she wasn't readily found either and with 3 business centers it could take a bit to locate her. And there was no clue what Paul's plans could be. She refocused on the paper in front of her. It was decently written but a little plain. The student was basically stating an idea already well established in the community and just reiterating why it was crucial to the study of psychology. It wasn't exactly inspiring reading. Unlike the paper before which was unique. Someone had researched the effect of early parenthood on the psychology of a teen. How it could in theory effect them in the future. They were using personal examples and interviews with their sibling as the teen parent in question. It was interesting thought experiment as teens had not matured yet psychologically as opposed to adults having children. They even brought bullying, from classmates and adults into the psyche of the new parent. That was fun to read. This was blah in comparison. This student just felt like they didn't care about the class which was sad.

Natalie always got a kick out of what interested the students about the general topics she taught. It always gave a slight insight into their minds. She wondered if any of them realized the irony in that. She finished grading the paper and pulled up the chart to enter her remarks and grades and noted another note from McGee.Suspect leaving 5th floor via south stairwell Suspect exits 1st floor. Appears to be searching while checking phone. acknowledged.

Shaking her head she grabbed her next paper and got back to work. This was stressful.

It was over an hour before she got another notification, suspect on 2nd floor, searching rooms inconspicuously. Gibbs says be careful. Acknowledged she sent back. She was down to 4 papers left and she was beginning to wonder if she would get them done before Paul found her or not. Part of her hoped she would, part of her wanted the anxiousness to stop. She grabbed another paper, this was one she was looking forward to. It was her student who wanted to talk about accepted cultural racism in Asian culture. She was curious what his argument would be. They talked extensively about what constituted racism from his own family. The fact that they pushed for him to date Korean women first, but would accept other Asian cultures but would reject anyone else. He said it constituted as racism while the family said no.

She was entering her comments and final grade into her spreadsheet when another notification popped up, entering your bus. Cent. So Natalie casually glanced at the window and could see a male shadowy figure reflected about 20 feet behind her. She purposefully picked the biggest table, which was at the back of the room. Rather than have herself be in full view from folks walking by she faced the window and beautiful view of DC instead. It also meant she could view reflections slightly in the window.

Her heart pounding she worked very hard to make her movements look natural. She grabbed another paper, took a sip of her tea, and began to pretend to read. She wouldn't do the student the injustice of attempting to read their paper now. She could feel a presence behind her but feigned interest in what she was reading. Conscious that Paul knew she could speed read she made sure to flip pages accordingly. He had leaned down over her right shoulder while simultaneously grabbing her left. As he spoke she quickly glanced at her laptop in clear view and noted McGee wisely closed their chat for her. He was remotely on her laptop and she knew was able to view and record from it. They had every word he said taped.

"Hello Beautiful, you're going to casually walk out with me with no trouble. You've been very hard to get a hold of Natty," Paul said while pushing a gun into her ribs.

Acting startled Nat said, "Paul! What-How, You shouldn't be here, please leave me alone."

He laughed, "Not a change, you've gotten away one too many times, you will be mine." He moved slightly and grabbed her upper arm as if 'helping' her up. He squeezed hard, "Now" he sternly ordered. Natalie slowly rose and looked into eyes that once belonged to a friend. He looked completely sane. He looked clear and focused, so unlike that day at her mothers. She tried pleading with him as they walked out.

"Paul, this is wrong and you know that. You need help."

"Yes, and you will give it to me. You will give everything to me or so help me no one will ever see you again. I can make that happen."

Natalie was scared. He had a gun and there were too many people in the hotel to really make a move without causing them potential harm. She glanced at the buttons on her sweater hoping like hell the voice and video recorder on them were activated and working properly. Everything he was saying would be used to put him away. As he was escorting her out of the lobby she noticed Kate, only because she knew her shoes, they were pink polka-dots, very memorable. She felt herself feel stronger. She could take Paul. He was dangerous but she was wiser, stronger and better prepared this time.

Paul led her down the parking lot. "Where are you taking me?" Natalie asked.

"Away." Was all he said. Once they were away from people she tried pulling away. It obviously didn't work and she didn't want it too, she wanted him less calm. Less calm meant he would make a mistake. "Don't fucking think about it Natty" he said grabbing her to him and pointed the gun at her face. "I have nothin' to lose and will just kill you here and now. Do you think your grandpa boyfriend will still think you pretty with a bullet in your face?"

Natalie froze, grandpa boyfriend? He meant Gibbs. But how…

"That's right, I saw you fucking him last night." He pulled her up to a van and opened the door. He shoved her in, "I know why you never wanted me, I'm not old enough for you. Daddy issues bitch! Well I'll make you want me. I'll be better than any old guy. I can last longer, go more often and fuck you senseless." He put the gun in his pants at his lower back and moved the close the door. Natalie knew she needed to do something and quickly kicked with all her might.

He slammed into the vehicle beside them with a yell. She bounced out of that van so fast after him slamming her forearm into his windpipe. She kneed him, hard, in the groin as he was reaching for his gun and headbutted him before running off back out of the parking garage.

"Natalie Down!" she heard Kate yell, and immediately dropped to her stomach mid run. She hit the ground hard enough to push air out of herself. Gunshots rang out echoing in the space. She glanced behind herself seeing Paul fall back with the gun raised. He recovered faster than she thought. Tony ran out from between cars and kicked the gun away.

"Nice shot Kate, he's still alive though," Tony said.

"Yes, he deserves prison." Kate said helping Natalie up, "You okay?" she had asked. "Gibbs wants to know…" so Natalie nodded her head still unable to speak yet. She was in shock.

"My stuff" was all she could say, thinking of her papers and laptop left behind.

"Secured," Kate said giggling, "You almost get kidnapped, fight for your life, and are involved in a shoot out and all you can think about is your stuff, yeah you're fine."

"BITCH, I'll get out!" Paul was saying as Tony was handcuffing him. He was bleeding profusely from his right arm and both knees. Kate took out his knee caps and gun holding arm. Natalie was impressed. "Get me a doctor you asshole, I'm bleeding out!" Paul said to Tony.

Tony chuckled, "you'll live, unfortunately. OWW!" yelled Tony. Paul was free and stumbled in Kate and Nat's directions. He could barely stand but that crazed look entered his eyes.


	28. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Kate was standing between Nat and Paul and was still in the process of turning around. Natalie quickly pushed Kate out of the way of the knife suddenly thrusting in their direction. Natalie roundhoused Paul in the head as Tony shot from a prone position. The kick spun Paul so that he took the shot in the chest. He dropped and started gasping. Blood began spilling out of his mouth. Tony was holding his stomach and Kate was holding her gun back on Paul. They called for the paramedics to hurry but it was too late. They watched as Paul gasped his last breath.

"Guess jail is out of the question," Tony said.

"Tony are you okay?" Natalie asked rushing to his side to check on his wound.

Tony chuckled then winced from the pain, "Yeah, just a cut, he didn't have the angle to stab. Should have noticed him reached for a weapon, stupidly thought he was trying to grab his knee or something from pain."

They could hear the sirens in the distance but knew whatever help they could provide would be too late for Paul. The good news was case over, Natalie was safe. She wouldn't feel like it was real until she saw Paul in autopsy, or buried, or both. It still seemed like he was some kind of movie monster. Like any minute he would sit up and continue his crusade. She snapped out of staring at his body when Kate handed her a cell, "Gibbs" was all she said.

"Hey Gibbs," she said.

"You okay? I'm on my way, FUCKING MOVE PEOPLE!" she heard him while obviously driving to her.

"Please drive carefully, I'm okay, Tony's been cut, Kate is unharmed. You don't need to rush," she advised him.

She swore she could feel him glare, "I don't care, I'll be there shortly, 2 blocks away. You're sure you're alright?"

She took stock of herself just for him. Other than a few sore spots she knew would bruise she was okay. Still shaking slightly but she clearly kicked Paul's ass and felt proud. "Yes Jethro, I'm alright. May have a couple bruises and a little shook up but I'm alright."

"SHE WAS TOTAL BADASS!" yelled Tony as the ambulance pulled up. "Hey Hey! Me, help me!" he was telling the paramedics when they rushed to Paul's dead body first, "Dead guy ain't going anywhere!"

"Gibbs, you're starting to scare me, CHRIST SLOW DOWN," she heard McGee say in the background of the phone and saw the NCIS crime truck drift around a corner before coming to a stop beside the ambulance.

"I didn't think it was possible to drift on of those," Kate commented watching Gibbs exit the vehicle closing his cell and berating McGee's backseat driving. Natalie hung up as well before handing Kate back her phone. She ran to Gibbs and he hugged her. He grabbed her face, looked into her eyes carefully before he kissed her. In. Front. Of. Everyone.

"I KNEW IT! Pay up McGee!" Tony said while paramedics were checking him over.

"Don't pay McGee," Kate began as she walked over to Tony, "He only made that bet because he heard Abby and I talking about it. He didn't think about it on his own, he was prompted by us."

"Nu UH! OWW" grumbled Tony as the paramedics put something on his cut. "I always know when people have a sexual chemistry, I knew, pay up."

"No one's paying anything." Gibbs barked, "No one bets on my personal life."

Natalie smiled while she snuggled into Gibbs. "Can we go get my stuff, I really need to finish grading papers. And I have to get my dissertation done."

"Woman, you were just attacked, and all you think about is work?" Gibbs said to her.

She kissed his cheek, "I know you need to take a statement but you won't be ready to take it for at least an hour. Do you have any idea how much work I can get done in that time?" she argued.

It took Gibbs 3 hours before he could take her statement. She had completed grading her psych papers and was alternating between her dissertation and her bio students lab reports. The lab reports were less pressing but she needed a break every so often from what she was doing. While her dissertation was pressing (she had to get it to her advisor soon before she could submit it to review), her work with her bio Phd was more an ongoing project and needed less time but it too was due soon.

"Ready," he asked walking into the conference room they set her up in. It wasn't a big one, thankfully she didn't need THAT much space. "We can do this here," he told her when she went to stand up. He put down his own recorder and so they started. He asked questions and let her tell her side of what happened. They had some video and audio to back everything up but they still needed her victim's report to complete everything. It took nearly an hour to go through it all but when they were done he asked her, "You ready to go see him? Ducky has him prepared?".

Natalie nodded. She confessed to Gibbs her fear, that she needed to see him dead and buried to feel like it was really over. He understood given her past with Paul. He led her to the elevator and they went down. It was only late afternoon so the office was still quite busy. By the time they reached the morgue though it was much more quiet.

"Hello my dear," Ducky greeted her. "You ready?" he asked while gesturing at the covered body on the table. Upon her nod he pulled back the sheet.

Paul lay on the table. He was so pale. He had been cleaned and all that could be seen were the bullet holes on his chest and arm. She imagined his knees looked pretty bad under the sheet. She grabbed a pair of gloves and put them on, "May I?" she asked the little scotsman.

"What would you like?" he clarified before saying yes.

Natalie thought for a moment, "To touch him, know he's really dead."

"He's very dead my dear, help yourself, I haven't started the autopsy yet. I'm my own assistant today, Jimmy has exams." Ducky explained. "Would you like to stay?" he offered her.

"Can I? At least for a bit?" she asked Ducky, also looking back at Gibbs for his approval. They both nodded.

Ducky let her touch Paul. She felt for a pulse first. Left a hand on his chest feeling for breathing. She knew it was irrational, the man was dead, but she didn't trust her eyes, she needed to feel, she needed to know it in her soul in order to feel safe.

Ducky walked her through the autopsy. It wasn't the first one she'd seen. She was involved with a couple back when she was completing her Masters. She had done well then and wasn't worried about 'losing her lunch'. He was meticulous, making noted as he went but was sure to point things out to her. Specifically the chest wound.

"This was the cause of death, DiNozzo's shot punctured a lung, without immediate medical attention a person dies," Ducky explained to her. "I know you know this, but if it helps make it real, I don't mind explaining in more detail," he offered.

"No, thank-you Ducky, this helps. Seeing him open, seeing the damage. He's really gone" she said. She whispered to herself, "He won't be coming back this time."

Ducky went to put a comforting hand on her arm but stopped himself, "No Natalie, he won't bother you in your waking life. I imagine you may dream of him occasionally, but that will lessen yes?"

"Yes." She knew the likelihood of nightmares involving Paul, but Ducky was also right, those would lessen over time. And she had the benefit now of knowing it was over. Her nightmares before were worse; knowing Paul was out there.

She thanked Ducky and left him to complete his autopsy. It would take Ducky hours to complete. She went back upstairs and stopped by the team's desks. She thanked them as well, for the millionth time, before she continued to the conference room they set her up in. She packed up her things and got ready to go home for the first time in two weeks. She almost didn't know what to do with herself now. She imagined she could get back into a routine, but it would be a new routine. One that included Gibbs in a personal capacity.

McGee drove her home as Gibbs was still working. Tim walked her to her door as Gibbs ordered. It was good he did. Her place was trashed. "We'll get someone over to document it, get it cleaned up for you, wanna go back to the office with me?" he asked her while calling Gibbs.

"Can I just go to Gibbs'?" she asked suddenly feeling exhausted. Gibbs preferred it that way it seemed so off to his place they went. After ensuring Natalie was settled McGee left to meet people back at Natalie's. Natalie was making food when she got a call from her grandfather.

"Hey Grandpa, I'm okay" was the first thing she said.

He chuckled, "Course you are, just checking in after I heard about your place. I got some junior agents tidying up when McGee and Todd are done documenting. It will be cleaned up when you get back to it tomorrow. So sorry about all this, you are a sweet girl. Also heard a rumor going around, thought you should know, people are aware of you and Gibbs. They also know not to fuck with you. I guess they heard about your badass Krav Maga skills. I'd blame DiNozzo for bragging.:

She smiled, "He would be my first guess. He's strangely proud of my skills, for a guy who was beaten up by them."

"Yes, personally I think he might be a little deranged," he joked. "Well I have another call I need to make I just wanted to check in one more time."

"Thanks, I'm good. Just about to make some food actually."

"Well Gibbs should be done in about an hour, expect to see him shortly after. Love you kiddo."

"Love you too."


	29. Testing

Hey guys, it's not over, just testing if this will work on my mobile rather than the tablet and I'll try to transfer the story over to upload. Bare with me through this technical difficulty


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